Work Stress
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 1,087
Work Stress
How do you deal with the work stress while staying sober? I honestly can't see how it's possible. Took a few months off, which was a great break, but back into it now. First while was just consultations, proposals, and the easy stuff. How difficult is it to talk to people, right?
Now it's crunch time, and when all the money gets made. Now how the hell could I keep myself sober while putting myself through this mental stress? Things happen way too quickly, there's loads of stress, everything always needs to be done yesterday, there's always new things coming in, etc.
So I don't know, guess I failed, which sucks. Took 3 months off to sober up, didn't happen, and there's no way it's happening while working. Oh well.
Now it's crunch time, and when all the money gets made. Now how the hell could I keep myself sober while putting myself through this mental stress? Things happen way too quickly, there's loads of stress, everything always needs to be done yesterday, there's always new things coming in, etc.
So I don't know, guess I failed, which sucks. Took 3 months off to sober up, didn't happen, and there's no way it's happening while working. Oh well.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Jackson Tn
Posts: 53
Don't beat yourself up. Things are overwhelming sometimes, I agree. Your job sounds much more difficult than mine, but I know in my managerial position there's always someone that needs something from me that just can't wait (looking at it now, I guess I felt that way about alcohol; there was always an urgency to my needs). In my short recovery so far, I've had to dive headfirst into putting my energy back into my family and I've tried to find a way to leave work at work. There's a balance that, if we don't find it, it's so easy to go back to what we addicts and alcoholics know. I wish you luck!
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,443
How do you deal with the work stress while staying sober? I honestly can't see how it's possible.
That observation is not meant to downplay your stress - but the answers not a bottle...in fact drinking is likely to make you fall further behind and lead to shoddy work....and more stress.
There are many practical and healthy ways to reduce stress. Forward planning as opposed to waiting until you have to run a deadline...set reasonable deadlines per day...take breaks...ramp up the exercise..eat well...get a decent amount of rest.
there's a lot more suggestions here:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...44-stress.html
D
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Planning ahead and being aware that there is stress in all areas of life is a start. Concentrating on the task at hand helps too. You can only focus on one task at once so make it your goal to perform each task as well as you can before moving on to the next.
Guest
Join Date: Jun 2015
Posts: 444
Hi Troy,
I know how you feel. I run my own business and the stress can be unrelenting. The start of my many year drinking problem coincided with starting this business. Alcohol took the edge off.
Two really important things mentioned by previous posters:
-Millions of people do not drink a drop and get through stresses of life in other ways.
-Performance. The alcohol will almost certainly lead to increasingly shoddy performance at work, poor health and the depression/anxiety that comes with that.
You can find healthy alternatives to stress reduction that are far more user friendly and free yourself from this.
Wishing you the best,
d
I know how you feel. I run my own business and the stress can be unrelenting. The start of my many year drinking problem coincided with starting this business. Alcohol took the edge off.
Two really important things mentioned by previous posters:
-Millions of people do not drink a drop and get through stresses of life in other ways.
-Performance. The alcohol will almost certainly lead to increasingly shoddy performance at work, poor health and the depression/anxiety that comes with that.
You can find healthy alternatives to stress reduction that are far more user friendly and free yourself from this.
Wishing you the best,
d
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Posts: 18
Others make a great point when they say that drinking just adds to stress. I was an all-day drinker and dealing with all the stress at work PLUS the 'drunkover' was ten times worse. I know I'm performing at my best when I'm sober. That's not to say it's easy, though. Today is my 7 days sober (again), and it's rough!
I've had periods of sobriety before and it does get better. It can just be hard to see that sometimes. I've replaced alcohol and drugs with working out. Swimming, running, and strength training. You just have to find that thing that makes you feel better and go to it when you're feeling stressed. I know that even with all the effort I've been putting into my exercise these past couple months, it's still hard. We have to relearn how to cope with things and that just takes time, I guess.
I've had periods of sobriety before and it does get better. It can just be hard to see that sometimes. I've replaced alcohol and drugs with working out. Swimming, running, and strength training. You just have to find that thing that makes you feel better and go to it when you're feeling stressed. I know that even with all the effort I've been putting into my exercise these past couple months, it's still hard. We have to relearn how to cope with things and that just takes time, I guess.
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Probably my living room. Maybe my bedroom if I'm feeling lazy
Posts: 1,085
Work stress was always a trigger for me.
I'm an anxious person as it is, and somehow, I found myself in a career that is extremely stressful (albeit my current job is slightly less stressful than my previous one).
So first and foremost, I got sober and stayed sober. It's crazy how simple something as just not drinking really helped. I still have the same job I did when I ended up having a physical and mental breakdown that landed me in the hospital and then inpatient rehab 28 months ago. I still have to deal with the same crap I did back then. But the same situations I faced before I was sober that made me crazy anxious and stressed just don't bother me anymore. And because I missed so much time from work with rehab and then a major surgery just 6 months after that, I had to spend a lot of time proving myself to everyone, which meant billing hours like crazy. I may be more tired than I was from running around all the time, but the stress level has definitely decreased with long-term sobriety.
I've since been promoted and have a lot more responsibility, which comes with a lot more stress.
So here's how I deal with it. Same thing I do with alcohol. Just take things one day at a time. I am constantly prioritizing things and deciding what needs to be done just for today and take care of that. The rest can wait until tomorrow.
I'm also able to recognize what is in my control and what isn't. Usually, there's far less in my control than I initially think. I don't sweat that stuff. If a client doesn't get me what I need by a deadline, it ain't my problem. If a coworker doesn't reply to an important email in a timely manner, there's nothing I can do about it. I can only look at my list of things to do and try to keep crossing things off faster than I add them (which almost never happens, but I keep trying).
Finally, I've learned to celebrate my successes. Even the little things. After finishing a big project, I do take a little time to feel good about my accomplishments in a healthy way instead jumping right into the stress of the next project. Maybe a nice dinner out or catching a movie that I've been putting off seeing because I've been so busy.
I don't know if you're an AA guy or not, but, at least for me, going through the steps definitely helped me tremendously, especially in knowing my character defects and keeping them in check. Also, being involved in something like AA outside of work gives me a sense of higher purpose than just being a corporate slave. I still work 60-80 hours a week and have to travel regularly (my taxes at the end of the year are a bitch with all the state returns I have to file). But I still make time to be an active participant in AA, whether I'm sponsoring someone or taking service commitments. It's a great change of pace from the corporate gig.
I'm an anxious person as it is, and somehow, I found myself in a career that is extremely stressful (albeit my current job is slightly less stressful than my previous one).
So first and foremost, I got sober and stayed sober. It's crazy how simple something as just not drinking really helped. I still have the same job I did when I ended up having a physical and mental breakdown that landed me in the hospital and then inpatient rehab 28 months ago. I still have to deal with the same crap I did back then. But the same situations I faced before I was sober that made me crazy anxious and stressed just don't bother me anymore. And because I missed so much time from work with rehab and then a major surgery just 6 months after that, I had to spend a lot of time proving myself to everyone, which meant billing hours like crazy. I may be more tired than I was from running around all the time, but the stress level has definitely decreased with long-term sobriety.
I've since been promoted and have a lot more responsibility, which comes with a lot more stress.
So here's how I deal with it. Same thing I do with alcohol. Just take things one day at a time. I am constantly prioritizing things and deciding what needs to be done just for today and take care of that. The rest can wait until tomorrow.
I'm also able to recognize what is in my control and what isn't. Usually, there's far less in my control than I initially think. I don't sweat that stuff. If a client doesn't get me what I need by a deadline, it ain't my problem. If a coworker doesn't reply to an important email in a timely manner, there's nothing I can do about it. I can only look at my list of things to do and try to keep crossing things off faster than I add them (which almost never happens, but I keep trying).
Finally, I've learned to celebrate my successes. Even the little things. After finishing a big project, I do take a little time to feel good about my accomplishments in a healthy way instead jumping right into the stress of the next project. Maybe a nice dinner out or catching a movie that I've been putting off seeing because I've been so busy.
I don't know if you're an AA guy or not, but, at least for me, going through the steps definitely helped me tremendously, especially in knowing my character defects and keeping them in check. Also, being involved in something like AA outside of work gives me a sense of higher purpose than just being a corporate slave. I still work 60-80 hours a week and have to travel regularly (my taxes at the end of the year are a bitch with all the state returns I have to file). But I still make time to be an active participant in AA, whether I'm sponsoring someone or taking service commitments. It's a great change of pace from the corporate gig.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,450
I have a theory. I know `millions of people deal with stress without alcohol' but I think some of us are more sensitive than others and stress affects us differently. It just means we have to work harder to counteract the effects.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: California
Posts: 2,693
Troy,
How is it working during crunch time with a debilitating hangover though? I guess some people don't get the hangover jitters/sweating/panic/racing heart. I'll just speak for myself when I say that the hangovers made my career/days at work darn near impossible. I wasn't able to think straight/perform.
Another problem I had while drinking was that I was completely useless after 5 PM every day because I was drunk. There were times I received emails from my boss in the evening or even a few phone calls and I had to not answer them because I was too drunk to talk or write.
How is it working during crunch time with a debilitating hangover though? I guess some people don't get the hangover jitters/sweating/panic/racing heart. I'll just speak for myself when I say that the hangovers made my career/days at work darn near impossible. I wasn't able to think straight/perform.
Another problem I had while drinking was that I was completely useless after 5 PM every day because I was drunk. There were times I received emails from my boss in the evening or even a few phone calls and I had to not answer them because I was too drunk to talk or write.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,443
Originally Posted by Tang 
I have a theory. I know `millions of people deal with stress without alcohol' but I think some of us are more sensitive than others and stress affects us differently. It just means we have to work harder to counteract the effects.
There's no reason we can't learn new, more positive and more effective ways to deal with stress -
in fact sensitivity kinda makes finding some new strategies even more important
D
Re-Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 7,909
So did the drinking help? Sounds like now you've just added stress about drinking to the pile.
Maybe you need something more intensive like an inpatient rehab?
I repeat it over and over again in here, but sometimes the best we can do in a day is not take that first drink no matter what. Put your sobriety first and your work second.
Wishing you the best today...
Maybe you need something more intensive like an inpatient rehab?
I repeat it over and over again in here, but sometimes the best we can do in a day is not take that first drink no matter what. Put your sobriety first and your work second.
Wishing you the best today...
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
Posts: 25,826
Alcohol is not the answer, no matter how hard we try to justify it is to ourselves, simply giving up and accepting we need alcohol to deal with work is a lazy approach.
Instead we need to get creative, find new ways, new stress busters, new tools in the toolbox for dealing with life, exercise, yoga, meditation, more sleep, healthier diet, less caffeine etc etc
Sobriety needs work, we have to become proactive and make it happen and stop accepting the status quo, it can be done, the question is how much energy are we prepared to put into making it happen?!!
Instead we need to get creative, find new ways, new stress busters, new tools in the toolbox for dealing with life, exercise, yoga, meditation, more sleep, healthier diet, less caffeine etc etc
Sobriety needs work, we have to become proactive and make it happen and stop accepting the status quo, it can be done, the question is how much energy are we prepared to put into making it happen?!!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 732
I was determined to get sober during my time off, but didn't, I drank more than ever. I got sent home from work today with 'flu' as I'm now day 2. I wish I had done it then but never mind, I'm still going to do it. As for coping with stress when sober, that's where I fall down every time :-(. Not this time though - I've lost my partner because of my behaviour I will not lose my job!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Troy, let me know if I am not understanding this correctly. You took 3 months off of work to straighten out, and ultimately did not? So you are still drinking?
If that is correct, I will share my experience. You asked how you deal with the stress, and how you get out and talk to people. IMO, the alcohol is what is holding you back, not the other way around. I have a business, and I simply can't handle the stress when hungover or going through withdrawal, so I would never even attempt it. When it came to work, I had to be 100% spot on, no interference from alcohol. So that's how you deal with it. Don't numb it with booze, get the booze out, get your confidence and a clear head, and these daunting tasks will be easy peasy.
If that is correct, I will share my experience. You asked how you deal with the stress, and how you get out and talk to people. IMO, the alcohol is what is holding you back, not the other way around. I have a business, and I simply can't handle the stress when hungover or going through withdrawal, so I would never even attempt it. When it came to work, I had to be 100% spot on, no interference from alcohol. So that's how you deal with it. Don't numb it with booze, get the booze out, get your confidence and a clear head, and these daunting tasks will be easy peasy.
Member
Join Date: May 2015
Location: California
Posts: 2,435
I drank a lot because of stresses from work. It made things so much harder. If I was having an issue, the drinking made the issue worse because my anxiety and depression increased. There was even talks of layoffs several weeks ago and I went through the stress sober. I go on walks, come to SR as often as I can and be around positive people as much as I can. My productivity at work has also increased because I'm not dealing with hangovers anymore.
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