Today
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: Metro Atlanta, GA
Posts: 36
Today
Sort of new. I used to have a different screen name, but couldn't remember how to log in. This site really helped me in the past. I normally just lurk, but I am in serious need of help.
My life has spiraled out of control this past year. My work has been a huge stress and my home life is just as stressful. I don't have any friends or a way to really get out of the house. I have two little boys and my youngest is extremely special needs. It will be difficult to get to meetings, but I have been a prisoner in my own home for so long that I fear of relapse.
I have quit drinking so many times in the past few years only to become overrun with depression and hide in a bottle. Longest recent sober time was a month back in March. I was proud of myself but overconfident that I could drink one more time.
My husband is also an alcoholic. We have enabled each other. He is in the process of getting clean, but if we want our family to make it, we cannot hide away as we have been. I am hoping he will try a meeting and find someone to confide in. Many issues with this. He told me he would go because I asked him to. I want him to go because he wants to. He doesn't want to go and be around people court ordered to go. I understand that. Don't read this wrong and think I am trying to force him to go. I am trying to support and encourage him the best way I can. As an alcoholic, I cannot support him the way he needs. I love him and want him well. He has gone through withdrawal too many times and I worry about him and need this nightmare to stop. We need to stop the enabling and begin repairing our damaged family.
If aa is not an option, can you please suggest some alternatives. I think face to face interactions would be the best since we are basically homebound outside of work. Sitting around the house just makes the want to drink greater.
Sorry this got long. My intention was to say I am on day two. I am taking it one day at a time but am beyond ready to be normal again. Thanks for listening.
My life has spiraled out of control this past year. My work has been a huge stress and my home life is just as stressful. I don't have any friends or a way to really get out of the house. I have two little boys and my youngest is extremely special needs. It will be difficult to get to meetings, but I have been a prisoner in my own home for so long that I fear of relapse.
I have quit drinking so many times in the past few years only to become overrun with depression and hide in a bottle. Longest recent sober time was a month back in March. I was proud of myself but overconfident that I could drink one more time.
My husband is also an alcoholic. We have enabled each other. He is in the process of getting clean, but if we want our family to make it, we cannot hide away as we have been. I am hoping he will try a meeting and find someone to confide in. Many issues with this. He told me he would go because I asked him to. I want him to go because he wants to. He doesn't want to go and be around people court ordered to go. I understand that. Don't read this wrong and think I am trying to force him to go. I am trying to support and encourage him the best way I can. As an alcoholic, I cannot support him the way he needs. I love him and want him well. He has gone through withdrawal too many times and I worry about him and need this nightmare to stop. We need to stop the enabling and begin repairing our damaged family.
If aa is not an option, can you please suggest some alternatives. I think face to face interactions would be the best since we are basically homebound outside of work. Sitting around the house just makes the want to drink greater.
Sorry this got long. My intention was to say I am on day two. I am taking it one day at a time but am beyond ready to be normal again. Thanks for listening.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Indiana
Posts: 503
An IOP is a great option. It's not cheap, but most of the people attend of their free will. In addition to the group aspect, there is the medical supervision, family meetings, and generally a full-support staff.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Okay, you stated he doesn't want to go because ( ______________ ) - which, is just an excuse, right? I don't think anything or any one way to get help is going to blow sunshine and rainbows 24/7. There are parts of any recovery program that are going to be difficult, uncomfortable, and that will be hard to do. Long-term sobriety requires changing everything, and working on it and doing whatever it takes.
Never mind him. You sound really tired and stressed. Can you get to a meeting? Many meetings have free childcare - many meetings allow children. I've been to several meetings with disabled children present, and I've always enjoyed their presence. There is really no benefit to you all sitting around miserable, when there is free help.
Never mind him. You sound really tired and stressed. Can you get to a meeting? Many meetings have free childcare - many meetings allow children. I've been to several meetings with disabled children present, and I've always enjoyed their presence. There is really no benefit to you all sitting around miserable, when there is free help.
Trudgin
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 6,348
If you both work, why can't you alternate times to each go to meetings separately? Many friends in the rooms find it "difficult" to go to meetings. Some close friends have even been court ordered. 
Perhaps you can't leave hubby alone??
Consider taking care of yourself first and foremost. By your very actions of working a program of recovery he may be inspired, maybe. He's will need to find his own path ultimately - he's fortunate to have your support and love, but you need to be sober regardless of his deal.
There are many who stay sober without an outside program. It is vital for me and has become a huge life line.
As you mentioned f2f support would be best for you there are alternatives to AA. I am sure others can share their experience with this. AA typically has a lot of meetings, depending on where you live of course.
Thanks for the thread - you're not alone.
Glad you came back to the good folks at SR!!
Perhaps you can't leave hubby alone??Consider taking care of yourself first and foremost. By your very actions of working a program of recovery he may be inspired, maybe. He's will need to find his own path ultimately - he's fortunate to have your support and love, but you need to be sober regardless of his deal.
There are many who stay sober without an outside program. It is vital for me and has become a huge life line.
As you mentioned f2f support would be best for you there are alternatives to AA. I am sure others can share their experience with this. AA typically has a lot of meetings, depending on where you live of course.
Thanks for the thread - you're not alone.
Glad you came back to the good folks at SR!!
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,494
This is a sticky with information on recovery programs for you:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
I have to agree with biminiblue, you sound tired and stressed. Being a prisoner in your own home cannot be a good experience. I would be patient and suggestions will come along via this site. Unfortunately I cannot think of any solutions (off the top of my head), but I know I would be digging deep to find ways to make your "prison" a better place. Maybe games the family can play, exercise, anything that can bring structure and rewards to yourself and family. I wish you the best.
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