mickey3701

My names brianna, I'm an alcoholic. Tonight I really feel like venting. I can't get out what I need to say in AA meetings. Alcohol has completely taken over my mind. It's all I think about, it's all I care about. If you read my other posts, I've had many tragedies happen to me at an early age. All I want to do is drown this pain inside & that is something I can't do sober. I heard a quote the other day, "first you take a drink, and then the drink takes you." This couldn't be anymore true because the drink had completely taken me so down under into a hole I don't think I can dig myself out of this time. All I wanted to do was kill the pain I felt for so long & now I think the pain is killing me. I don't want to stop drinking because I don't know how else to feel better. I really need someone to talk to right now, someone please reply

Soberintexas007

Quitting alcohol is very difficult, as I am only on Day 3. But you are going to have to find a way to deal with your pain in another way. Exercising, taking a walk, seeing a psychiatrist for a medication consultation are all options. The alcohol may take you away from your pain for a brief period of time, but unfortunately it has all of those negative side effects. It's difficult to get sober, but it can be done. God bless!

ScottFromWI

Welcome Brianna. You'll find a lot of folks who understand what you are going through here on SR. I was where you are too and it is no fun at all. Drinking was the source of nearly all my problems, not the cure.

Verte

Welcome to the forum, Brianna.

Many of us can relate to this sentiment. I thought I was drinking to feel better, or stay in a non-thinking space and I'll tell you that I dug an enormous hole and burned a lot. I made things much, much worse for myself and a lot of people around me.

I have faith that you can learn new skills to manage your experience as you need them. A drinking life is a painful one. Do you have any support right now (Doc, therapist, counselor, Priest, AA sponsor)?

Coldfusion

Hi Mickey!

I have realized since I quit drinking that most of the misery and anxiety I was experiencing was alcohol withdrawal. I had to get beyond the withdrawal to feel better. Maybe you need to go to an in-patient detox for help through withdrawal?

sleepie

Glad you started this thread Mickey. So sorry you are in this place. I have been where you are, at a much younger age- in a place where I had no control and no adults who cared to help, and abusers. All I can say is- stay strong. It isn't fair. It isn't easy. You don't deserve this.
Talk to us.
We are here. I am sorry you have all this to deal with.

mickey3701

Thank you very much. I would message you, but am not able to until I have posted 5 posts. Would like to talk to you but don't know how else to, lol

Vision12

Glad to see you here mickey.
Really glad to see this post, post as much as you need to
Everyone on this forum can relate in some way shape or form. The people here can offer amazing support.
Not going to lie it's hard, but it does get easier in time.

sleepie

I had no alcoholism or crutches when I was younger. But, I had art, a little bit of drawing. Do you do anything like this for yourself?

IOAA2

Hi.

Please try to hang on. This too shall pass, maybe not ASAP but it will pass as long as we don’t pick up the first drink.

I take exception to “I can't get out what I need to say in AA meetings.” I understand what you mean but learned a long time ago that by doing things I didn’t want to do the results were often beyond my expectations.

Remember being at meetings is a place where people understand each other and are there to help. Remember the statement “Our primary purpose is to stay sober and help other alcoholics to achieve sobriety.” This is a two way street.

BE WELL

PurpleKnight

Welcome to the Forum Brianna!!

Thepatman

Sad truth is that Alcohol might bring temporary emotional relief, bit the trail of destruction it leaves behind us is not worth the temporary fake relief.

You can get sober and remain that way. Rooting for you.

Berrybean

Hi Brianna - welcome to the forum.

How long have you been sober / going to AA?
Early sobriety is def overwhelming - and it's very difficult at first without the crutch of alcohol, but you can do it, as millions before you have done.

If you stay sober and start working the steps with a sponsor then you will start feeling some relief from the anxiety; anger; guilt; etc. that alcohol used to smoke-screen for you. Those promises DO start coming true. Honest - cross my heart



B