update...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Nowhere, VA
Posts: 540
update...
Hi! I hope everyone is doing well!
The past couple months have been stressful, but in a good way I suppose. Finishing up the semester in school (barely, but I did), getting everything straight for getting approved on the house, and getting little blossom situated.
Well tomorrow (hopefully, waiting on grant funds for downpayment to come in) we should be closing on our "princess house"! I was supposed to close in April but new windows had to be put in per FHA regulations and that took forever, then the grant I was awarded for a down payment expired so we had to wait on that to be reapproved. It was reapproved as of yesterday. If all goes as planned (which it never does of course!) LB and I will "camp out" at our new house tomorrow night on a blow up mattress with some pizza. We aren't moving in officially until the floors are refinished but I thought it would be fun, especially since we will be working on the house Saturday.
EXABF was so surprised that I'm doing this, and I won't lie, its an awesome feeling to accomplish something someone told you you could never do. (his last comment was "yea, your house is about the size of my garage")
Its been a tough tough road. And I'm not done yet but it will feel so good to come home to my own house and know that it will be the way I left it. To have my own domain, for Willow to have a sense of permanent stability.
I haven't been on here in forever, I hope everyone is doing good! I've been hiding a little, I have been on the depressed side...well maybe more exhaustion than depressed
The past couple months have been stressful, but in a good way I suppose. Finishing up the semester in school (barely, but I did), getting everything straight for getting approved on the house, and getting little blossom situated.
Well tomorrow (hopefully, waiting on grant funds for downpayment to come in) we should be closing on our "princess house"! I was supposed to close in April but new windows had to be put in per FHA regulations and that took forever, then the grant I was awarded for a down payment expired so we had to wait on that to be reapproved. It was reapproved as of yesterday. If all goes as planned (which it never does of course!) LB and I will "camp out" at our new house tomorrow night on a blow up mattress with some pizza. We aren't moving in officially until the floors are refinished but I thought it would be fun, especially since we will be working on the house Saturday.
EXABF was so surprised that I'm doing this, and I won't lie, its an awesome feeling to accomplish something someone told you you could never do. (his last comment was "yea, your house is about the size of my garage")
Its been a tough tough road. And I'm not done yet but it will feel so good to come home to my own house and know that it will be the way I left it. To have my own domain, for Willow to have a sense of permanent stability.
I haven't been on here in forever, I hope everyone is doing good! I've been hiding a little, I have been on the depressed side...well maybe more exhaustion than depressed
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Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 2,393
YAY Blossom!!!! Enjoy that little garage sized house of PEACE with LB!!! Does it have a backyard? Your fun camping out with the blow up mattress made me think of a little campfire and smores out back would be fun!!!! Congratulations!!!
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 16,246
Blossom......you sound so much more confident, now!!!
I can remember when you felt so "beholdin' and intimidated by your ex boyfriend"...................BUT----baby, look at you now!!!!!!!!!!!
Way to go and persevere.....
dandylion
I can remember when you felt so "beholdin' and intimidated by your ex boyfriend"...................BUT----baby, look at you now!!!!!!!!!!!
Way to go and persevere.....
dandylion
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Nowhere, VA
Posts: 540
Thanks everyone!!!
There are still days where he tries to control and manipulate. He had her for the long memorial day weekend (stressful!). He sent me about 40 pictures of her, which I welcome some pictures but it was overload and then he sent a text (I'm assuming he was drinking) around 10:30 saturday night that he wished I was there with them. She came back full of tick bites in her hair, had to take her to the doctor.
I just keep focusing on what I can do on my side of the street for her and I, and keeping documentation of things that might be useful in court. Other than making sure she is okay, I do not respond to him.
Mom and I have had some issues since living together, I don't like being around her and her bf and their dysfunctions. I love her, but its a constant emotional battle.
I couldn't have gotten this far with out you all! Its no where near perfect and I don't plan for it to be, just a lot more peaceful!
There are still days where he tries to control and manipulate. He had her for the long memorial day weekend (stressful!). He sent me about 40 pictures of her, which I welcome some pictures but it was overload and then he sent a text (I'm assuming he was drinking) around 10:30 saturday night that he wished I was there with them. She came back full of tick bites in her hair, had to take her to the doctor.
I just keep focusing on what I can do on my side of the street for her and I, and keeping documentation of things that might be useful in court. Other than making sure she is okay, I do not respond to him.
Mom and I have had some issues since living together, I don't like being around her and her bf and their dysfunctions. I love her, but its a constant emotional battle.
I couldn't have gotten this far with out you all! Its no where near perfect and I don't plan for it to be, just a lot more peaceful!
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 16,246
Blossom.....living with your mother......(and I KNOW that you love her very much....and, I am sure that she is a great person in many ways..... ......I think that this practically makes you a monument of tolerance and patience.....
I know that you mother has been very helpful to you and that she loves you and your daughter. I am sure that you know that and are grateful, deep down.....(as you should be).....
However, after one has moved out on their own and has their own child....living in the childhood home, again, just seems almost impossible...
Our western cultures are just not set up for this...in this day and age....
I salute you....(I would have been living in a refridgerator box in the back yard, myself).
It looks like those days are coming to a close, soon.....
dandylion
I know that you mother has been very helpful to you and that she loves you and your daughter. I am sure that you know that and are grateful, deep down.....(as you should be).....
However, after one has moved out on their own and has their own child....living in the childhood home, again, just seems almost impossible...
Our western cultures are just not set up for this...in this day and age....
I salute you....(I would have been living in a refridgerator box in the back yard, myself).
It looks like those days are coming to a close, soon.....
dandylion
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Nowhere, VA
Posts: 540
Thank you for the support everyone! I love smaller houses...less clean up, less money on utilities. And it has a great back yard! I'll take pictures at the walk through today!
dandylion - you are right, while I am VERY grateful for her support and love, It is very hard to go back. I think once everyone kind of gets into their own living habits it is a big adjustment! I know she will be very weepy when I move....she is looking at houses close by (she found one 2 houses down but it was out of her price range...is it bad I'm thankful for that?)
dandylion - you are right, while I am VERY grateful for her support and love, It is very hard to go back. I think once everyone kind of gets into their own living habits it is a big adjustment! I know she will be very weepy when I move....she is looking at houses close by (she found one 2 houses down but it was out of her price range...is it bad I'm thankful for that?)
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 314
This post made me happy. Sounds like you and your little one are on the road to peace and happiness.
I am just about to move with my little daughter too, and I just can't wait for us to have a fresh start in a house that will be fresh for our own new memories to be made.
I totally get where you are coming from re your Mum. I love my mum so much but living together would be too much, it is natural as we are adults with our own lives now.
Good luck to you guys! X
I am just about to move with my little daughter too, and I just can't wait for us to have a fresh start in a house that will be fresh for our own new memories to be made.
I totally get where you are coming from re your Mum. I love my mum so much but living together would be too much, it is natural as we are adults with our own lives now.
Good luck to you guys! X
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 2,792
Blossom, Congratulations!! I am so happy for you. When you have this success, it shows to so many alanons that they can do it also!! So proud of you for following the path God set out for you!!
You have to understand, that everything is a stepping stone to where you are going. You had to live with your mom to get what you are getting now. Embrace it, appreciate it and thank her with all your heart. You would do the same for LB!! (even if it was very difficult at times))
Enjoy your camp out and every day after with your wonderful new home that you can call your own!! hugs my friend!!!!
You have to understand, that everything is a stepping stone to where you are going. You had to live with your mom to get what you are getting now. Embrace it, appreciate it and thank her with all your heart. You would do the same for LB!! (even if it was very difficult at times))
Enjoy your camp out and every day after with your wonderful new home that you can call your own!! hugs my friend!!!!
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