Calicofish

Hello Friends:

In a couple of weeks I will be a facing a stressful situation and want to keep myself strong and focused, so I am asking for help and support from this wonderful place.

Recap: I am just over 90 days sober. I left my marriage last year and moved 3000 kms and started a new life in a new community. My family lives nearby...but that is changing. They are moving 2500 kms away in a couple of weeks, and I will be alone. I'm trying not to think about it, because when I do, I break down. My parents are elderly, and my father is not well - I may never see him again.

Anyway - I know it won't be the end of the world. I am trying to stay focused and just live in the "now" and not let my head start imagining all sorts of scenarios.

Thanks.
CF

Dee74

Best wishes for you calicofish in whatever you're facing - you have many of us with you

D

mecanix

Up's and down's happen calico , that's life .

It's better delt with sober than it would be drunk .

It's a good day today , none of us can divine the future , so stay in today where you can do the best for yourself .

Bestwishes, m

ArtFriend

Sorry about your situation. It can be stressful when there are so many big changes... stay close to SR during this period. Do you have any f2f friends?

doggonecarl

While they are close, make the most of the time you do have. When they move, have a contingency plan in place to make visits possible, as needed.

Mountainmanbob

That is a sad thought.
Our thoughts and prayers are with you.
MM

CaseyW

First off, congrats on the 90 days if I haven't said that before.

Second, I'd focus right now on spending as much time with them as you can. Keep building those good memories!

Ruby2

It's sad and stressful to face people moving. I'm glad you thought in advance and came here to talk. Can you set up some type of arrangement to Skype? It's not exactly the same as in person but you can see and talk to people. A cousin of mine lives in England with her 3 children and Skypes her mother here in the US between visits in person.

ccam1973

Congrats on 90 days CF. You are a strong individual and will get through this change. You also know that any thought of drinking is only your AV picking at any moment of weakness that it can. Drinking will only make any bad or challenging situation 10,000X times worse.

I like Ruby's Skype idea; we use it often with family that live far from us.

Thoughts and prayers to you and your parents.

Calicofish

Hello Friends:

Thanks for all the replies. Ruby - I do have skype and will be using it frequently. I'm trying not to dwell on this - my parents are better off moving and I am just not in the position to give them the care they require. I just wish it was not a three day drive. I moved back (to where I am now) to be closer to my family, however, things changed and they are moving. Sheesh.

I thought I'd start a thread on this to per-empt any thoughts of drowning my "sorrows". Talk it out - get prepared. I know I will cry and feel lonely. But it won't kill me. I'm very good at isolating and hiding. I'm trying to make new friends and get involved in my new community. It's happening, slowly.

I have a really sweet little house and it makes me happy just to sit in it. I am very blessed - I have a wonderful family and sometimes I can't believe how lucky I am and whether I deserve it. Sometimes I feel like a fraud and I'm waiting for the bubble to burst and wake up and realize all this is a dream.

Anyway - I don't mean to get all maudlin (is that the correct word?). Chin up - tally ho. Seize the day. I expect I will be leaning on this group for several weeks.

Thanks,
CF

ZaBoozer

Hey CF,

Try maybe see the positive. If they move to place that is three days drive away, when you do drive to see them, maybe you will see some lovely places on the way?

Not much I know, but worth a try.

Chin up.

trachemys

I hate to state the obvious: move again. You moved to be near them. Box it all up and do it again. Why not?

Goodstart

First congrats on your 90 days! Make the most of your time with them and plan on Skype as much as you can.

Calicofish

No thank you. I do not want to live where they are going. I am making a new life for myself. I've literally just opened the last box I packed last year. I will miss my family, very much, but moving with them is not an option for me, at this time.

I do appreciate the suggestion Trachemy - though it made me snort my soda through my nose :-)

trachemys

Sorry 'bout the nose. And the screen and keyboard.