I need help. Bad.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: FL
Posts: 9
I need help. Bad.
Hello, forum! I'm going to try keeping this short, but I appreciate any and all insight that may be gained from this. Thank you so much, in advance.
I signed up two months ago with a somewhat clear-minded approach to ending my weekend drinking 'hobby' for good, and if I recall correctly, I lasted for about seven days (or less). After that, I habitually went back to drinking on the weekends (and the occasional weekday) without a care in the world -- and believe me, I should care. My recent liver enzyme test didn't come back looking too hot. This clearly isn't my finest hour.
After spending the past month or so delving into every book I could find about solving my inner issues, a few things became increasingly evident to me. For one, I needed to practice mindfulness every day, because I lacked the ability to see the greater picture of my life at any given time, and I would often distract myself when it came time to choose a path and stick with it. Once I got the hang of that, another harsh truth emerged - I needed to get professional help for my crippling social phobia. Needless to say, this one scared me more than anything else in the world, but after getting that ball rolling, I started to realize that I am making the correct decision every time I listen to my gut and remain mindfully aware. I love therapy so far, too.
So here I am now, with a third harsh truth. I'm slowly killing myself from the liver upward every time I drink. It's bad enough that I'm otherwise gluten-free now, because I can feel the impact that beer has on my gut harder than ever before, but it's becoming evident to me that sooner or later, I'm going to convince myself I don't actually have an alcohol problem. Clearly though, I do. I haven't had any run-ins with the law or done anything too terribly stupid while drinking, so I can skew my own views on my own drinking whenever the time is right, and that's not the mindful approach. At all.
My main question is this: Do I need to ask about getting alcoholic counseling as well? Bonus question: Will it help me? AA is a little out of my league at the moment due to my social phobia, even though I'd love to check it out in the future, so that isn't going to work for me at the moment.
Thanks so much for your (guys'es) time, and I apologize for making such a long post. I'm currently hungover and having bad gluten-allergy symptoms to the hoppy beer I had last night, and I'm so sick of this lifestyle. Thanks again!
I signed up two months ago with a somewhat clear-minded approach to ending my weekend drinking 'hobby' for good, and if I recall correctly, I lasted for about seven days (or less). After that, I habitually went back to drinking on the weekends (and the occasional weekday) without a care in the world -- and believe me, I should care. My recent liver enzyme test didn't come back looking too hot. This clearly isn't my finest hour.
After spending the past month or so delving into every book I could find about solving my inner issues, a few things became increasingly evident to me. For one, I needed to practice mindfulness every day, because I lacked the ability to see the greater picture of my life at any given time, and I would often distract myself when it came time to choose a path and stick with it. Once I got the hang of that, another harsh truth emerged - I needed to get professional help for my crippling social phobia. Needless to say, this one scared me more than anything else in the world, but after getting that ball rolling, I started to realize that I am making the correct decision every time I listen to my gut and remain mindfully aware. I love therapy so far, too.
So here I am now, with a third harsh truth. I'm slowly killing myself from the liver upward every time I drink. It's bad enough that I'm otherwise gluten-free now, because I can feel the impact that beer has on my gut harder than ever before, but it's becoming evident to me that sooner or later, I'm going to convince myself I don't actually have an alcohol problem. Clearly though, I do. I haven't had any run-ins with the law or done anything too terribly stupid while drinking, so I can skew my own views on my own drinking whenever the time is right, and that's not the mindful approach. At all.
My main question is this: Do I need to ask about getting alcoholic counseling as well? Bonus question: Will it help me? AA is a little out of my league at the moment due to my social phobia, even though I'd love to check it out in the future, so that isn't going to work for me at the moment.
Thanks so much for your (guys'es) time, and I apologize for making such a long post. I'm currently hungover and having bad gluten-allergy symptoms to the hoppy beer I had last night, and I'm so sick of this lifestyle. Thanks again!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Midwest
Posts: 8,334
wxfdswxc2,
Have you considered discussing your drinking with your current therapist? I think many of us "self medicate" our anxiety / phobias, with alcohol, so you may find the two conditions linked.
Have you considered discussing your drinking with your current therapist? I think many of us "self medicate" our anxiety / phobias, with alcohol, so you may find the two conditions linked.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: FL
Posts: 9
Originally Posted by lighter 
There are online AA meetings if that might help you.
Counselling helps some people, not others, so it's worth trying it anyway.
Interested to hear what you are doing about your social phobia, what treatment plan.
Counselling helps some people, not others, so it's worth trying it anyway.
Interested to hear what you are doing about your social phobia, what treatment plan.
From what I've gathered so far, I'm going to be learning CBT (which I know enough about due to extensive reading), but the act of going at all and talking about my feelings with a stranger is a major step for me, thus far. I didn't think I'd ever work up the courage to do that, and those limiting beliefs were just recently shattered.
Originally Posted by Pondlady
wxfdswxc2,
Have you considered discussing your drinking with your current therapist? I think many of us "self medicate" our anxiety / phobias, with alcohol, so you may find the two conditions linked.
Have you considered discussing your drinking with your current therapist? I think many of us "self medicate" our anxiety / phobias, with alcohol, so you may find the two conditions linked.
I could see that being a theme with alcoholics. Maybe I shouldn't be so scared of AA, I'd probably get along and resonate with a lot of people who go there.
Do your best
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,047
Nice to meet you i want you to know by staying sober i save my life everyday
i was once desprate & lost and never thought i could be writing this msg to you now
one day youl help others in the exact same fashion
Spk soon friend
i was once desprate & lost and never thought i could be writing this msg to you now
one day youl help others in the exact same fashion
Spk soon friend
Member
Join Date: May 2015
Posts: 122
Originally Posted by wxfdswxc2
From what I've gathered so far, I'm going to be learning CBT (which I know enough about due to extensive reading), but the act of going at all and talking about my feelings with a stranger is a major step for me, thus far. I didn't think I'd ever work up the courage to do that, and those limiting beliefs were just recently shattered.
but it might help to know that you don't have to share or say anything at a AA meeting if you don't want to.Most people who go to an AA meeting are like
at first but it isn't 
it's more 
.Anyhow... social anxiety often goes with depression and or alcoholism. Alcohol makes both of these conditions worse (social anxiety and depression ) but on its own just being sober often isn't enough to be happy.
It's the kind of thing I generally recommend going to a doctor for in addition to a shrink/councillor because antidepressants often do help in addition to cbt & exposure therapy.
Getting sober is a good first step, though.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: California
Posts: 1,914
I think seeing a therapist is a great step. Hopefully once you start to overcome your anxiety it will help with your fight to stay sober.
It's easy to think of all the reason why we "should" drink, but maybe next time you feel the cravings hit remind yourself about your liver test and the fact that you can't make it through a weekend without drinking... it's hard to face to truth, but if it saves your life it's worth it!
could you make other weekend plans that don't involve drinking? Maybe even stay in for a few weekends to get some time under your belt.
It's easy to think of all the reason why we "should" drink, but maybe next time you feel the cravings hit remind yourself about your liver test and the fact that you can't make it through a weekend without drinking... it's hard to face to truth, but if it saves your life it's worth it!
could you make other weekend plans that don't involve drinking? Maybe even stay in for a few weekends to get some time under your belt.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 4,860
The American Society of Addiction Medicine has this link on its site for finding a board-certified physician who specializes in treating addiction:
Member Search - American Society of Addiction Medicine
That may be a helpful resource for you. You don't have to be sick of this anymore -- there is life after booze. Take good care.
Member Search - American Society of Addiction Medicine
That may be a helpful resource for you. You don't have to be sick of this anymore -- there is life after booze. Take good care.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: FL
Posts: 9
Thanks for the encouragement, everyone. I need it more than you know, and I appreciate it a lot.
I've unfortunately relapsed three times after coming back here. On my next appointment (which is only six days away), I'm going to tell my therapist I think I have a drinking problem. I hope I can stay away from beer for that long without convincing myself this isn't a problem and I should, "just relax".
4 days of drinking during a given week is more than half of the week... That idea hit me today and it struck a deep nerve. Anyway, you guys are awesome. <3
I've unfortunately relapsed three times after coming back here. On my next appointment (which is only six days away), I'm going to tell my therapist I think I have a drinking problem. I hope I can stay away from beer for that long without convincing myself this isn't a problem and I should, "just relax".
4 days of drinking during a given week is more than half of the week... That idea hit me today and it struck a deep nerve. Anyway, you guys are awesome. <3
Member
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 770
Counseling is how I got and have stayed sober for 4 years, it has helped me immensely - However, I truly beleive my substance abuse stems from childhood trauma so that may be why counseling is vital to me, but might not be the solution for others.
Im still scared to tell my therapists certain things, my friend told me once " I've been lying to my therapist. ......and I pay her for that?!"
it's a normal fear to tell others are sEcrets, you can start out slow, you dont have to tell them things you don't want to (although I usually feEl a huge weight lift from my shoulders when I do) but it is extremely important to be certain I trust my counselor before hand.
Im still scared to tell my therapists certain things, my friend told me once " I've been lying to my therapist. ......and I pay her for that?!"
it's a normal fear to tell others are sEcrets, you can start out slow, you dont have to tell them things you don't want to (although I usually feEl a huge weight lift from my shoulders when I do) but it is extremely important to be certain I trust my counselor before hand.
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