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Hey y'all! Just an introduction :)

Old 04-18-2015, 04:13 PM
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Hey y'all! Just an introduction :)

Hey everyone, I've been reading the forum for a while, but am just now getting to where I think I may want to post. I am finding that my usual 1-2 glasses of wine is slowly turning into 3-4 glasses, and it raises some concern for me as I had my fair share of struggles with alcohol since about age 12 or so, and had always been able to overcome them- this time feels different. I don't drink until I blackout and I never drive drunk but I am definitely concerned that I am now able to finish a bottle of wine or more by myself and not be totally hammered. I honestly think I drink out of boredom more than anything else. Anyways, I look forward to getting to know you all better and hopefully figure out this craziness before it becomes a real problem!
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Old 04-18-2015, 04:17 PM
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Welcome to the posting side of things TonesofHome

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Old 04-18-2015, 04:35 PM
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Welcome, and it's a good idea to work on your drinking problem now, because alcoholism is progressive and if you don't stop, it will worsen. You'll find lots of support here.
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Old 04-18-2015, 05:14 PM
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Thanks!

Hey you guys, thank you for responding! I definitely know I need to get a handle on things now sooner than later! Addictive personalities are very prominent in my family and my Dad passed of cirrhosis, though it was a genetic liver disorder he was still a moderate and at times heavy drinker. I know I am on a slippery slope and have talked with my husband about wanting to join AA but I think he is afraid that he will not be able to drink if I get sober ( he is a light drinker) and the stigmatism of being married to an alcoholic. He doesn't feel as if I have a problem, but at the same time, I don't think he understands that I am trying to take preventative measures to ensure that I do not become a full blown alcoholic if that makes sense? Definitely trying to sort all of this out and weigh my options
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Old 04-18-2015, 05:20 PM
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Hello & Welcome TonesOfHome
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Old 04-18-2015, 05:24 PM
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Welcome to the Forum TonesOfHome!!
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Old 04-18-2015, 05:30 PM
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Hello:

Welcome. I'm so glad that you are posting now. It makes a huge difference. My hubby is a normal drinker and it doesn't bother me if he drinks so it can be done. When people ask me why I don't drink I tell them that it is because I don't like it anymore, or I say that my body is a temple and o respect it, making a joke... Depends on the mood, but in general people do not make a big deal about it. It was a little weird with some people but my true friends are exactly the same with me, just minus the booze. I also tell people that I want to feel and look my best. I have 13 months and I feel great physically. My hubby, being a "normie", wanted me to moderate but after some conversations I believe he is starting to understand that I can't and I don't want to. Who wants 2 drinks? I want 10!

Wanting it is the first step. Search AVRT, AA, SMART, educate yourself. Reading here is a great way to learn.

Welcome again and see you around.
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Old 04-18-2015, 05:33 PM
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Welcome to the family! There's lots of support here for getting sober. SR has helped me stay sober over five years now.
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Old 04-18-2015, 06:16 PM
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welcome Tones
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Old 04-18-2015, 06:20 PM
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Welcome to SR!!!

Hugs and prayers,

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Old 04-18-2015, 06:33 PM
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Great to meet you Tones! Wish I'd been as smart about admitting I needed help.
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Old 04-19-2015, 07:47 AM
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Originally Posted by Nowsthetime

Wanting it is the first step. Search AVRT, AA, SMART, educate yourself. Reading here is a great way to learn.

Welcome again and see you around.
Thank you for the great info!!
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Old 04-19-2015, 07:57 AM
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Originally Posted by TonesOfHome View Post
I don't think he understands that I am trying to take preventative measures to ensure that I do not become a full blown alcoholic if that makes sense?
It makes absolute sense. I think you're doing precisely the right thing. If I had done something similar when I noticed that I could down a bottle of wine with ease then I wouldn't be facing the uphill struggle that I'm facing now. Do what you think is right for you and make sure your husband understands that you're different from him and need to approach things your own way.

If it doesn't sound too patronising, I think you're approaching this very maturely.
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Old 04-19-2015, 08:54 AM
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I'm glad you are aware of the fact you are entering into "dangerous" territory. I didn't acknowledge the entry. I plowed right through and woke up a full blown alcoholic drinking night into day. I was in deep trouble and had no idea how or when I had crossed that line. I'm glad you have a place to come and discuss and think about your options and actions. Welcome!
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Old 04-19-2015, 10:32 AM
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But you got it :)

Originally Posted by Hevyn View Post
Great to meet you Tones! Wish I'd been as smart about admitting I needed help.
But you eventually did and that is a great achievement
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Old 04-19-2015, 03:43 PM
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Thanks for that Tones.
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Old 04-19-2015, 06:02 PM
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Originally Posted by TonesOfHome View Post
I know I am on a slippery slope and have talked with my husband about.... and the stigmatism of being married to an alcoholic
I can tell you this right now. There doesn't have to be stigma of being married to a recovering alcoholic. Why? Because nobody has to know. You'll just slowly but surely be known as a non-drinker. Now if you show up to New Year's Eve parties and wedding receptions waving around a Big Book and preaching the gospel while pouring their stash down the sink then there would probably be a stigma.

You are now a non-drinker. Lots of people don't drink. 30% of adults don't drink at all and another 30% of adults barely drink. Like a drink or two or three a week or month. Most of the people I know in my life fall into this category they may drink one or two once a week or once a month - they never get drunk though except for maybe at weddings every five years. And even then it's really not that bad.

My sobriety is private and there is absolutely no stigma so don't worry about that.

On the other hand, think of the stigma of being married to an active alcoholic. It doesn't sound like you got to the blackout crazy stuff yet but that would probably be waiting for you and any bystanders if you continue.

There is definitely a stigma of being married to an active alcoholic but there is no stigma with being a nondrinker.

Often, people, including myself, worry that not drinking will garner a lot of attention. I can tell you from experience that it does not. What did garner a lot of attention was my drinking
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Old 04-19-2015, 06:15 PM
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It's best to start now before things get worst. Welcome Tones. The support here is great.
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Old 04-19-2015, 07:18 PM
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Welcome to SR!

As most of us have discovered, alcoholism is progressive. The sooner you recognize that's it a problem for you, the better.
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Old 04-19-2015, 08:26 PM
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Welcome! I too are very new here. Joined last Friday. My drinking consisted of one bottle of wine, starting at 4pm each day and then two very large vodkas, one at 8pm and the other at 9pm. I measured my vodkas and they were 300 mls each. So I was drinking nearly a bottle of vodka a night. But the problem was I was blacking out after the first vodka and becoming an unpleasant drunk. When I think about it, I haven't remembered going to bed for nearly four years. My husband is a little confused too. he feels I should stop and then just drink smaller amounts. He is now coming round to the fact I don't want two drinks, I want 10! He's on board and I am so grateful for his support and you will find everyone here so helpful and kind
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