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Broken Record

Old 04-06-2015, 04:24 AM
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Broken Record

It seems my promises don’t mean much these days, the constant and annoying repetition of stating I am quitting alcohol with the repetitive variation of the last attempt has made me a liar.

The tears in my wife’s eyes last night were too much, she doesn’t believe me anymore, with good reason.

Regardless, I feel I am ready to quit, so once again I am making this promise, to myself.

I read this recently, “give up, give in or give it all you got”, giving it all.
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Old 04-06-2015, 04:35 AM
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Keep trying. As long as you're alive, there is hope!
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Old 04-06-2015, 04:36 AM
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Me too... I haven't even voiced it to my husband yet, I was going to but I knew he wouldn't believe me so I'm unusually quiet today.

I'm reading a lot on here. Are you doing it on your own? I am so far but there is an AA meeting tonight 10 miles away that I went to once 2 years ago. Might go and just sit and listen...

Feeling really shell shocked and subdued...

Good luck x
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Old 04-06-2015, 04:39 AM
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Originally Posted by Stiv View Post

I read this recently, “give up, give in or give it all you got”, giving it all.
Try this one on for size too;

"Give up, give in, AND give it all you've got...."


Give Up fighting to try and prove you can find a way to live the life you really want and also keep drinking.....

Give In - to the notion that there are others who can help, programs that can guide you and support that will be required. Give In to the notion that it's not only OK - but essential to simply say "help me". Give In - to sobriety and embrace its promise and its possibility.

Then...

Give It All You've Got - by taking firm, committed actions to support a choice of a better life. Surround yourself with changes and actions that support and enable sober living. Give yourself to it....

And watch the magic happen.

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Old 04-06-2015, 04:43 AM
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Originally Posted by FreeOwl View Post
Try this one on for size too; "Give up, give in, AND give it all you've got...." Give Up fighting to try and prove you can find a way to live the life you really want and also keep drinking..... Give In - to the notion that there are others who can help, programs that can guide you and support that will be required. Give In to the notion that it's not only OK - but essential to simply say "help me". Give In - to sobriety and embrace its promise and its possibility. Then... Give It All You've Got - by taking firm, committed actions to support a choice of a better life. Surround yourself with changes and actions that support and enable sober living. Give yourself to it.... And watch the magic happen.
What Owl said! :-) You can do this! Rooting for you.
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Old 04-06-2015, 04:44 AM
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Hi.

For many this commitment is not a walk in the park, much depends on a good healthy mental attitude, IT WILL WORK!

Being sober is work which involves much personal change and insights along with being honest with ourself about our drinking and accepting we cannot drink in safety one day at a time in a row.

I believed life would be better and it was beyond belief as I put a lot of effort in recovery the old fashioned way, following directions for one, from the oldtimers.

BE WELL
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Old 04-06-2015, 04:53 AM
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I'm sure most of us have been down this road before. Yes give it your all!!!! Quitting for real takes a deep commitment where we have to take responsibility for our own actions but we must know that we need support.
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Old 04-06-2015, 04:56 AM
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Saying it is one thing - doing it definitely another.
What's your plan Stiv?

D
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Old 04-06-2015, 06:17 AM
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Having a sober plan really helps Stiv

Positive forward thinking & actions bud
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Old 04-06-2015, 06:22 AM
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Originally Posted by Stiv View Post
I

The tears in my wife’s eyes last night were too much, she doesn’t believe me anymore, with good reason.
Best if we do it for God first then ourselves
and then not to forget
a Happy Queen makes for a Happy King

Good luck this time around.

Mountainman
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Old 04-06-2015, 06:22 AM
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I was the same way saying it over and over. Now I'm doing it and I feel really proud of myself. The ball is in your court and you can do this. We are here for support! Remember, you have to do the work, but it is possible!!!
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Old 04-06-2015, 07:16 AM
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Unfortunately I've been there and done that. It got to the point where even I didn't believe me any longer when I said I was going to try to quit.

It can be done, though. There are many paths to happily sober after. Find yours.

You can do this.
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Old 04-06-2015, 07:17 AM
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Glad you are back stiv. What exactly are you planning on "giving your all" to? Have you tried an organized sobriety plan like meetings or perhaps AVRT or other self based programs? Many times it's not about trying harder...it's about trying something different.
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Old 04-06-2015, 07:19 AM
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Stiv I feel like a broken record too...... but it can be done there are a ton of people on here who are living proof of it!
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Old 04-06-2015, 07:48 AM
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You've got this! Believe in yourself!
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Old 04-06-2015, 08:23 AM
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Hi Stiv. Having been on both sides of this fence, being an alcoholic with an active alcoholic husband, I know that talk is cheap. You can't just talk the talk. You have to walk the walk. I was a broken record for years. It was always I know, I know, I have to quit. But I didn't know how. Always tomorrow, never today. I finally made a plan and asked for help. I stuck to that plan.

My husband? He knows how to quit and what to do to stay quit but isn't choosing to do it. Empty promises. I don't believe a word he says anymore and won't, for a long while. He takes no action. Words alone are not enough. You have to quit for you, Not your wife. If you take action and follow through, you will do alright. Hang in there.
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Old 04-06-2015, 08:30 AM
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I feel you

Originally Posted by Stiv View Post
It seems my promises don’t mean much these days, the constant and annoying repetition of stating I am quitting alcohol with the repetitive variation of the last attempt has made me a liar.

The tears in my wife’s eyes last night were too much, she doesn’t believe me anymore, with good reason.

Regardless, I feel I am ready to quit, so once again I am making this promise, to myself.

I read this recently, “give up, give in or give it all you got”, giving it all.
I did this to girl friend of over a decade many times. I would say, I am going to quit but never did. I felt the same as you: a liar, lame for not keeping my word; afterall what's a man without his word? I kept trying and my gf was paitient enough with me even after saying I am quitting for so long. One day, I just new I had to stop. I felt it in my body, literally, the pain of to much drinking had taken internal effects on my body. I decided if I don't stop I won't be able to keep promises I made to her and my family. I have too much to do to go out like this so I decided to quit once again. Now 62 days later I have stayed quit!

Like someone else said don't give up! Keep trying! When you feel with everything in your mind and body that you must quit, you will quit, and you will feel awesome for doing it. By the way, my relationship hasn't been this good in a long time. No arguments and just a lot of love
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Old 04-06-2015, 09:05 AM
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You can do this Stiv, but something other than good intentions is where I needed to make a few changes to make Sobriety work!!

For me my own strength only got me soo far, instead I needed support, a plan and a focus every day to keep me Sober, some though decisions were needed.

You can do this!! Make a plan and make Sobriety happen!!
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Old 04-06-2015, 10:11 AM
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Thanks everyone, lots of good posts.

I do need a plan, AVRT has worked in the past as long as I commit to the time needed to read, study etc.

I may also look for a local meeting, my problem in past attempts seems to have been not staying plugged into sobriety. Things go good then focus is lost and it is just a matter of time before I’m back.

It’s very interesting how many long term sober people still come to this site, it must be key. I will say this, I am going to commit to reading here every day, as part of my plan and try to post when I have some positive input.

Thanks!
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