JT

I have been in recovery for some time and it ebbs and flows. I forget lesson's that were learned and have to relearn them.

I have been in a bad place with Ward lately...which in the end makes ME unhappy, which in turn makes HIM unhappy. When JT ain't happy, nobody's happy!

I have found myself picking his nit every time he turns around and experience tells me that this is about me...not him. Lord knows he never changes, it is my perception of him that changes.

Now when I get in one of these funks I KNOW it is about me but a committee member is always screaming in my ear that I am always the one making the adjustments. Ward simply goes along on his merry way never making change one....or so it seems. This time it is HIS turn to accomadate me...I have taken my turn more than once. When is it his turn??

It is his turn when he decides for himself that it is, not one moment sooner and I am thinking that will be never. So where does that leave me?? It leaves me with a choice and for some reason right now it is becoming clear all over again. I choose to be happy even when he isn't. I choose to grow even when he doesn't. I choose to stay healthy even while his health declines. I choose to love and honor the good and ignore the bad. The bad being not all that bad goes without saying. I DO have boundaries...The worst is that he drinks to the point of stumbling and slurring (almost entirely at home) and doesn't take care of his health. I am not going to go into all the good stuff because that would be pushing it :sour: I am trying to stay in reality...LOL!

Anyway that is my struggle and it comes and goes. Once learned does not mean forever practiced...

Hugs,
JT

smoke gets in my eyes

Don'tcha kind of miss when we were allowed to just have a hissy fit and get it out of our system? Now we have to be all rational and self focused. I recommend bowling, or some other quasi-violent pastime for purging. :wink2:

((( JT! )))

JT

Smoke...are you on my committee?? That voice sounds very familiar!!

Let's see..I DO Bowl...I golf using pink golf balls...and I read murder mysteries. Quasi-violent enough?? I never said I don't have fun!!

Hugs,
JT

Gabe

We're not allowed to have hissy fits anymore? I am deeply disappointed.

JT

When was the last time you checked the manual Gabe. Quazi-violence and passive aggressiveness were added in ther last printing! Overt agressiveness is punishable by banishment...

Gabe

Quazi-violence is still approved? Thank God. I thought I was going to have to give up my sessions with the Dammit Doll.

JT

Hitting HIM with the Dammit Doll would be considered borderline behavior. After all that is not really overt aggressiveness as long as the stuffing has not been modified from it's regulation cotton batting.