Conjoint meeting
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Join Date: Mar 2015
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Conjoint meeting
Well, my partner (or soon to be ex-partner - see 'feeling lost' thread) is coming out on Sunday. But before she does, we have a conjoint meeting with her therapist. Does anyone else have experience of these? What should I expect. Thank you all !
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Join Date: Jul 2010
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Wait a minute, I thought she was breaking up with you? Why would you be at a joint meeting with her therapist?
Was this set up before she told you she was breaking up with you? If so, I think I'd pass on it. And if it wasn't, I think I'd pass on it.
Was this set up before she told you she was breaking up with you? If so, I think I'd pass on it. And if it wasn't, I think I'd pass on it.
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I'm curious and I want answers. This is not a silly teenage puppy love relationship, however, my patience is wearing thin. I've deleted all photos off my phone and generally preparing for what might come. I've even unfriended her on facebook ha ha. I'll keep you posted.
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i agree you are setting yourself up. She made it clear what she is feeling. Her motivations for wanting you at a meeting with a therapist after the fact is very suspect. Why? You aren't married and you don't have kids.
My guess - she wants something from you and anticipates using the therapist as a mediator.
Why don't you just ask her what its all about?
My guess - she wants something from you and anticipates using the therapist as a mediator.
Why don't you just ask her what its all about?
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Ch- we are not saying this is a puppy love relationship. (We all love our a's)But u say, your patience is thin, u deleted her photos and blocked her on fb. The next step would be no contact then.
She needs to do this on her own. It doesn't benefit u at all to hear any of this stuff. Let her be on her own. You need to detach from her. If u go she knows she still has you "helping" her along. She can Not do it with your help. I agree with everyone else.
Mind your own business, and take a pass. Let her struggle and work her sobriety. It's the only way it will truly work.
The old saying.... what was for you, won't t go by u.
She needs to do this on her own. It doesn't benefit u at all to hear any of this stuff. Let her be on her own. You need to detach from her. If u go she knows she still has you "helping" her along. She can Not do it with your help. I agree with everyone else.
Mind your own business, and take a pass. Let her struggle and work her sobriety. It's the only way it will truly work.
The old saying.... what was for you, won't t go by u.
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
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Originally Posted by ch76 
I'm curious and I want answers.
Best case scenario, the therapist explains to you why the therapist is supporting her in her decision. So that explains the therapist. She is barely sober. I doubt that she's had time to do the deep reflection to understand her reasons for splitting with you.
I don't see this meeting as bringing you any closure, comfort, or hope. Your call, but I'd still pass.
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Of COURSE we wish you well. Just keep your expectations for what you get out of this very low. If you get something helpful or useful that's great. I just wouldn't go in expecting to get that.
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Tightening of the forehead, heart thumping, butterflies in my stomach and holding back the tears. Feel like a broken man. My kids will keep me busy until the meeting. I'm going to see the doctor next week. Depression may be creeping back in. Send your hugs please
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Dear one, the therapist is HER support, not yours. They are not there so that you can get answeres or heal. They are doing the bidding of their client. Many of us have been roped in, manipulated, burdened, ambushed and bushwhacked by threapist and rehab centers. They really don't care if the meeting makes it better or worse for you. I suspect this will be worse as you are coated in a syrup of self serving psycho babble that makes excuses for all of her nonsense and encouraged to accept it. Just saying. Please don't put yourself through that. When she is bette and if she wants, she can tell you herself in private. If she needs a therapist in the room to talk to you, maybe should just stick to working on herself.
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Duckygirl1, the rehab centre she is in provides support to the friends and family of clients by having group sessions where we can express our thoughts, fears and emotions. It's an inclusive program where they do consider the welfare of the people closest to the client. I am genuinely sorry about your current difficulties.
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