Hope for us yet
p***enger
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: NYC
Posts: 19,021
Hope for us yet
This might inspire a few of you, especially if you're struggling with PAWS:
I drank for a long time. Many times over the last decade or two, my husband would ask me if I remembered this or that -- a movie, a trip, an afternoon, big things, small things. I got really tired of always answering, "no, I don't remember what you're talking about." A whole city we visited together left no trace in my head.
I'd make a joke of it -- I'd say, "I'm easy to entertain, because I can watch the same movie over & over, and it never gets old." I treated it like an eccentricity: I'd tell people who had little things they needed from me, "if you don't see me writing it down, this conversation hasn't happened." I'd lie and say I remembered things when I didn't.
It was all the booze. Life in brownout.
Tonight my husband asked me if I remembered something we did around Christmas time, nothing important. I did! I was there. My mind is returning, and life is starting to leave an impression.
I drank for a long time. Many times over the last decade or two, my husband would ask me if I remembered this or that -- a movie, a trip, an afternoon, big things, small things. I got really tired of always answering, "no, I don't remember what you're talking about." A whole city we visited together left no trace in my head.
I'd make a joke of it -- I'd say, "I'm easy to entertain, because I can watch the same movie over & over, and it never gets old." I treated it like an eccentricity: I'd tell people who had little things they needed from me, "if you don't see me writing it down, this conversation hasn't happened." I'd lie and say I remembered things when I didn't.
It was all the booze. Life in brownout.
Tonight my husband asked me if I remembered something we did around Christmas time, nothing important. I did! I was there. My mind is returning, and life is starting to leave an impression.
EndGame
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 4,677
I was once told that I talked someone, a stranger to me, out of committing suicide during a blackout, though the person who told me the next day didn't know I was blacked out. Of course I told her. To this day she still does not believe me. And I don't think I believe her either.
great stuff Courage 
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 341
My latest drinking episode left me completely mortified, apparently I told a friend that I would do something for them (that would literally take MONTHS of my time and money), I was so blown away when my kid mentioned it the next morning. I had 6-7 drinks that night and do not even remember getting buzzed, never mind blacked out, I still can't make sense out of it.
Still don't know how I'm getting out of it and my son was witness to the whole conversation. UGH
I seriously have to quit. Day 5 today (again).
Still don't know how I'm getting out of it and my son was witness to the whole conversation. UGH
I seriously have to quit. Day 5 today (again).
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
