Need some encouragement
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 6
Need some encouragement
So, day 11 after the dui. Marriage was rocky before but dh just informed me of we are splitting. Really glad for the Antabuse right now, so not going to drink but ouch. I am not good at emotional stuff and am at a total loss as to how to get through today let alone tomorrow. Can someone who has done this kindof walk me through today? We have been together 13 years and while he has obviously had time to come to terms with this I am still very much in love with him.
Thanks for letting me get it out.
Thanks for letting me get it out.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: C.C. Ma.
Posts: 3,697
Hi.
We know times like this are very painful and need to come to grips with the facts that drinking alcohol has solved none of our past problems people, places or things.
Most here drank because of our addiction to alcohol and the first drink beings the compulsion for more and more and things, us, get out of hand.
The simple solution for most of our drinking problems is not having the first drink one day at a time in a row. Simple but not always easy so stick around if you want sound advice about not drinking.
My solution involved attending AA meetings.
BE WELL
We know times like this are very painful and need to come to grips with the facts that drinking alcohol has solved none of our past problems people, places or things.
Most here drank because of our addiction to alcohol and the first drink beings the compulsion for more and more and things, us, get out of hand.
The simple solution for most of our drinking problems is not having the first drink one day at a time in a row. Simple but not always easy so stick around if you want sound advice about not drinking.
My solution involved attending AA meetings.
BE WELL
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Mi
Posts: 1,318
Hi Buster!
I haven't been through what your going through ( though I think I've been through just about everything else! )
But, I did want to offer my support! Dealing w/this sober will be so much easier than dealing with it drunk. Everyone here @ SR is very supportive, so plz. stick around.
I haven't been through what your going through ( though I think I've been through just about everything else! )
But, I did want to offer my support! Dealing w/this sober will be so much easier than dealing with it drunk. Everyone here @ SR is very supportive, so plz. stick around.
Guest
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 609
I agree with the above and want to add that in the heat of the moment, things are said. It's only been a few days since the incident.
If I were in your shoes I'd just give him space.
Focus on keeping your mind on today, on yourself (or maybe here at SR?) and don't engage.
I'm a duck-and-cover kind of gal when things get heated.
Glad you made it here, Buster. Take care.
If I were in your shoes I'd just give him space.
Focus on keeping your mind on today, on yourself (or maybe here at SR?) and don't engage.
I'm a duck-and-cover kind of gal when things get heated.
Glad you made it here, Buster. Take care.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
I'd agree - give him space. And focus on keeping sober while he takes the space to think things through in his way. Have you considered going along to try an AA meeting? I only ask as it might be a distraction, and a way to stop cutting yourself off from others in this time which can only be traumatic for you.
It is hard, but you really have no choice other than to try to accept your partners decision. The only persons actions that you have control over are your own. This may well be your rock bottom (unless you want to carry on and dig down further). It may seem bleak, but I've heard it said that 'rock bottom can provide a good solid foundation to start building back up from'.
Sending you a virtual *hug* (much better than the real thing as I have a stinking cold at the moment). Take care of yourself, and don't be afraid to reach out for the support that IS out there. xx
It is hard, but you really have no choice other than to try to accept your partners decision. The only persons actions that you have control over are your own. This may well be your rock bottom (unless you want to carry on and dig down further). It may seem bleak, but I've heard it said that 'rock bottom can provide a good solid foundation to start building back up from'.
Sending you a virtual *hug* (much better than the real thing as I have a stinking cold at the moment). Take care of yourself, and don't be afraid to reach out for the support that IS out there. xx
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: london uk
Posts: 261
Sorry to hear beccybean but we're here to offer what support we can.. In past situations I have called friends. Gone for long walks. Listened to sad music.. Cried a lot.. And slowly made my way through it.. It will pass.. Good luck
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: london uk
Posts: 261
Originally Posted by JimdiGriz 
Sorry to hear beccybean but we're here to offer what support we can.. In past situations I have called friends. Gone for long walks. Listened to sad music.. Cried a lot.. And slowly made my way through it.. It will pass.. Good luck
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