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Tried AA last night

Old 03-12-2015, 02:20 PM
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Tried AA last night

I'm sober since 12/28/14 and have been doing good on my own. I see a lot of references on SR about other peoples experiences with AA so I gave it a try last night. I'm sorry to say I didn't care for the experience.I am an alcoholic like the rest there but c'mon can't you put a little effort into your appearance? One guy was sober 28 years must have been when he got his last haircut. Most opted for cologne in place of a shower. And everybody smoked until they came inside, my family asked if I had been smoking because I had the lingering odor on me. I like the message there & will try other meetings in my area, I hope I can find one I like but I'm not ever going to fit in with the group from last night.You can be an alcoholic without looking like you just woke up from a 2 day bender.
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Old 03-12-2015, 02:25 PM
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You're not obligated to do or try anything you don't want to.

Just do whatever works for you.
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Old 03-12-2015, 02:36 PM
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Lol.
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Old 03-12-2015, 02:58 PM
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Definitely try other meetings headcase. Groups can vary quite a bit; the same meeting in the same place, but on a different day can have a different group dynamic.

The meetings I've attended have had a decent cross section of people; some members come in suits or other business attire, others come wearing nursing scrubs and there is usually a biker or two with the requisite long hair and long beards. I'm disciplined about my personal appearance and hygiene, but I try to keep an open mind in meetings and focus on the personality and what hope and inspiration members may offer. And I also find value in spending time with people from different walks of life.
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Old 03-12-2015, 03:00 PM
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I've been to several meetings in the past 11 days of my sobriety. I really suggest trying different ones until you find a group you like. I'm not into all the preachy, religion talk but I am spiritual so I take that info on my terms. I've definitely been to meetings that I didn't feel like I fit in and I've been to ones that have been fantastic. There's also all kinds of meetings: Discussion, Speaker, Step, Big Book, Sober Living, Beginners, Just Men, Just Women etc. Went to a Sober Living today and it was so so but to each their own. I'll give it another go next week.
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Old 03-12-2015, 03:03 PM
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Most of the meetings in my area are non-smoking. The people can differ greatly at different meetings.

AA may not be for you...but after struggling for a long time, I could not break free from the Obsession/Drinking/Craving cycle. I must have been just a hopeless, weak-willed, Alcoholic...like they describe in the AA 'Big Book'. The 12 Step Program of AA, and the group of friends I made through the program, is what effected the Miracle that happened in my Life. I am well over a year, completely Sober..and FREE, thanks to AA.

You may not need AA, and it may not work for you, but there are innumerable numbers of fantastic people in AA, that are dedicated to sharing what they do to stay Sober, and how Enriched their lives are because of the 12 Step Program of AA.

I found that, even in the meetings I have gone to that my initial impression was that it was a waste of time, the statement made at the end of Chapter 2 in the AA 12 & 12 Book rings true, "EVERY AA meeting is PROOF that God Can & Will restore us to Sanity". I did notice that even the guys that ramble on about so much useless BS...many of them are staying Sober, which I could not do until I worked the 12 Steps.

God Bless you headcase. RDBplus3...Happy, Sober, and FREE
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Old 03-12-2015, 03:08 PM
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LMAO!!!!!
I think some of the best advice I've heard at meetings has come from people that look like they slept in the clothes they are wearing and haven't shaved in a week. Then I'll see people come in all decked out (dressed to impress maybe?) and all they share are quotes out of the BB. Words of wisdom can come from anyone at any time. Ya never know. John
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Old 03-12-2015, 03:11 PM
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I imagine you went to that meeting for a good reason. Scruffyness seems like a not very good reason to not go.

But do whatever works. I don't go to AA either but I will say some of the best people I know look like they've just woke up from a two day bender.
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Old 03-12-2015, 03:15 PM
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Old 03-12-2015, 03:33 PM
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In some parts of the country (US) there are mandatory hygiene and dress code requirements. That holds true around the Chicago area - Maybe WI doesn't have these?!?!?

Keep coming back.....
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Old 03-12-2015, 03:37 PM
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Headcase,
The primary problem with AA meetings is that they are comprised of people who have or have had a major issue with self-control and are mostly unable to manage their own lives. The place is full of alcoholics. As a result several members can be a little rough around the edges.

As was previously indicated, the "value" that is imparted by members of meetings can come in some surprising trappings. I have had the honor of attending a fair share of meetings over the past several years and those have been comprised of some pretty "low bottom drunks" and in a several instances "shuttered meetings" that are of necessity populated by folks whose notoriety demands that attendance is selective, and those attending tend to be well turned out at least in appearance and hygienically.

The nuggets of wisdom and those suggestions which have enlightened me in a meeting have not been exclusive to either "type" of meeting. What has been a common thread and has been the gift that has been given to me always comes from those people who conduct themselves in humility and a desire to be of service to others. That message is one I am constantly trying to learn and thank goodness the meetings of all kinds offer me such great examples.

I have no idea if the fellowship of AA will be of any value to you, I sincerely hope it will as it has been for me. Try many meetings and I suspect you will find just what you need.

Best of luck and kudos to you for trying AA of any type.

Jon
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Old 03-12-2015, 03:39 PM
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Hunter orange or packer shirts Flynby!
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Old 03-12-2015, 03:43 PM
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You set yourself up for that one. Luckily ScottfromWI isn't on tonight.
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Old 03-12-2015, 04:06 PM
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headcase1:

I am neither for against AA. I don't believe anybody wants to "Pull" a person from one side to the other. We all just want to have you become involved in a route that keeps you sober.

You will find something that works for you by trial and error.

SR and a lot of determination is what I owe my sobriety to.

AA was not the route for me, but it does help ALOT of people

When I feel a bit weak, I flip my determination level on Full-Blast giving me that boost of SOBRIETY!
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Old 03-12-2015, 04:11 PM
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Originally Posted by headcase1 View Post
Hunter orange or packer shirts Flynby!
Reversible as needed depending on who's winning!!
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Old 03-12-2015, 04:40 PM
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my family asked if I had been smoking because I had the lingering odor on me. I like the message there & will try other meetings in my area, I hope I can find one I like but I'm not ever going to fit in with the group from last night.You can be an alcoholic without looking like you just woke up from a 2 day bender.
Shoot if your family is that sensitive to smell (what was it third hand smoke?) they must have gone bonkers when you were still drinking
I have been at a couple of meetings in the past where I was really wishing that there was an addendum to the 3rd tradition

The only requirement for AA membership is a desire to stop drinking and to take a daily shower
unless one is brand new and still living in the streets
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Old 03-12-2015, 05:00 PM
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You have an awesome attitude headcase! Just because that meeting wasn't for you doesn't mean there isn't one put there calling for you. I have found wonderful people and plenty of friends in AA. When I first went to AA I wasn't having it lol. I eventually went back after staying sober for a year and now I'm working the steps with a sponsor! Give it a try! I am becoming a better person. Growing more day by day!
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Old 03-12-2015, 08:30 PM
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I go to meetings to get sober. If there's something so offensive to me at a meeting that it distracts me from why I'm there, I leave. I've done this a few times.
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Old 03-12-2015, 09:51 PM
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Judgemental are we ?
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Old 03-12-2015, 09:55 PM
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The AA Big book states that in meetings and fellowship we will associate with those that we would otherwise never be associated with.

It's just one of the ground rules that comes with AA.

Just saying.

DD
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