Intro and advice
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: MA
Posts: 23
Intro and advice
Hi everyone, I wanted to introduce myself and I'm also seeking some advice.
My name is Jenn, I'm 41, and have two kids, ages 7 and 3. I've been sober since June 8, 2014. Alcohol had been a part of my life for so long and there were countless times that I told myself I had to stop but was never able to do it. I always gave into it calling my name, calling me back. I started drinking at 14 and I remember my first black out occurred not long after that and they continued to occur for the next 26 years.
So, long story short, I quit on my own, decided I was finally done and that was it. This is how it's been for 9 months and I've been doing okay. Lately though, I've had some thoughts, thoughts like "God, it would be nice to have a glass of wine with my friends" (a glass of course would inevitably turn into a bottle or more, don't think I've ever had A glass of wine and I continue to be in awe of anyone who does). I am sure I will never go back down that road, I am enjoying my alcohol free life too much to mess with it, however, I know it's a possibility, it's always a possibility. And quite frankly, I haven't really been tested because I haven't been in an environment where alcohol is flowing and abundant.
So, my question is, what do I do from here? Should I go to an AA meeting? Do I need AA?
Thanks for any advice.
My name is Jenn, I'm 41, and have two kids, ages 7 and 3. I've been sober since June 8, 2014. Alcohol had been a part of my life for so long and there were countless times that I told myself I had to stop but was never able to do it. I always gave into it calling my name, calling me back. I started drinking at 14 and I remember my first black out occurred not long after that and they continued to occur for the next 26 years.
So, long story short, I quit on my own, decided I was finally done and that was it. This is how it's been for 9 months and I've been doing okay. Lately though, I've had some thoughts, thoughts like "God, it would be nice to have a glass of wine with my friends" (a glass of course would inevitably turn into a bottle or more, don't think I've ever had A glass of wine and I continue to be in awe of anyone who does). I am sure I will never go back down that road, I am enjoying my alcohol free life too much to mess with it, however, I know it's a possibility, it's always a possibility. And quite frankly, I haven't really been tested because I haven't been in an environment where alcohol is flowing and abundant.
So, my question is, what do I do from here? Should I go to an AA meeting? Do I need AA?
Thanks for any advice.
Hears The Voice
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Unshackled
Posts: 7,901
Welcome to SR Jenny!
Drinking normally isn't really a special talent. The vast majority of people do it. I find people who can quit for 9 months much more inspiring! 
Originally Posted by JennyLittle 
don't think I've ever had A glass of wine and I continue to be in awe of anyone who does
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,857
Welcome, JennyLittle, to SR and congratulations on nine months of sobriety.
If you are feeling 'fragile' or think that your sobriety efforts need a boost, by all means adding a new element to your recovery could be a very positive experience.
I don't use AA but many folks here at SR are strong advocates of the program.
SR has been my recovery mainstay - by reading and responding to posts and daily participation in various threads.
Glad you found SR.
If you are feeling 'fragile' or think that your sobriety efforts need a boost, by all means adding a new element to your recovery could be a very positive experience.
I don't use AA but many folks here at SR are strong advocates of the program.
SR has been my recovery mainstay - by reading and responding to posts and daily participation in various threads.
Glad you found SR.
Sober since 10th April 2012
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Perth, Western Australia
Posts: 6,047
Hi Jenny, me too on never being able to stop at one glass. I find people who sip at a glass for an hour, and even leave a bit in there as incomprehensible. I also occasionally have thoughts about how nice a glass of white on a hot day would be, but truly, it's much easier once you accept that's not going to happen. If you catch yourself thinking that, discipline your thoughts right away. Accept that you will crave from time to time, but move on quickly.
It is possible to have a good time drinking soft-drinks with friends, or tea or whatever you like, you just have to put a bit of effort into it.
It is possible to have a good time drinking soft-drinks with friends, or tea or whatever you like, you just have to put a bit of effort into it.
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Scotland
Posts: 780
Originally Posted by JennyLittle
Hi everyone, I wanted to introduce myself and I'm also seeking some advice.
My name is Jenn, I'm 41, and have two kids, ages 7 and 3. I've been sober since June 8, 2014. Alcohol had been a part of my life for so long and there were countless times that I told myself I had to stop but was never able to do it. I always gave into it calling my name, calling me back. I started drinking at 14 and I remember my first black out occurred not long after that and they continued to occur for the next 26 years.
So, long story short, I quit on my own, decided I was finally done and that was it. This is how it's been for 9 months and I've been doing okay. Lately though, I've had some thoughts, thoughts like "God, it would be nice to have a glass of wine with my friends" (a glass of course would inevitably turn into a bottle or more, don't think I've ever had A glass of wine and I continue to be in awe of anyone who does). I am sure I will never go back down that road, I am enjoying my alcohol free life too much to mess with it, however, I know it's a possibility, it's always a possibility. And quite frankly, I haven't really been tested because I haven't been in an environment where alcohol is flowing and abundant.
So, my question is, what do I do from here? Should I go to an AA meeting? Do I need AA?
Thanks for any advice.
My name is Jenn, I'm 41, and have two kids, ages 7 and 3. I've been sober since June 8, 2014. Alcohol had been a part of my life for so long and there were countless times that I told myself I had to stop but was never able to do it. I always gave into it calling my name, calling me back. I started drinking at 14 and I remember my first black out occurred not long after that and they continued to occur for the next 26 years.
So, long story short, I quit on my own, decided I was finally done and that was it. This is how it's been for 9 months and I've been doing okay. Lately though, I've had some thoughts, thoughts like "God, it would be nice to have a glass of wine with my friends" (a glass of course would inevitably turn into a bottle or more, don't think I've ever had A glass of wine and I continue to be in awe of anyone who does). I am sure I will never go back down that road, I am enjoying my alcohol free life too much to mess with it, however, I know it's a possibility, it's always a possibility. And quite frankly, I haven't really been tested because I haven't been in an environment where alcohol is flowing and abundant.
So, my question is, what do I do from here? Should I go to an AA meeting? Do I need AA?
Thanks for any advice.
Welcome and well done on your 9 months of sobriety. (I'm nearly 9 months myself)
Lots of things work for different people, Its finding whats right and what works for you. I attend AA and am also on SR A LOT!
I often have fleeting thoughts of wouldn't it be nice to have a glass of wine....but I know ultimately it wouldnt be. Id be face down in my own crap and back at square one before I knew it.
Getting some support is a must.
Wishing you well
L x
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 9,029
Hi Jenny, welcome to SR and well done on nine months. That's great.
I found I needed more support than just on my own. Because even now at 15 months I have fleeting thoughts that a glass of wine would be nice. And I never saw the point of A glass either. The bottle plus more, thank you very much. I read and post on here. It gets me out of my own head, gets me thinking about what worked for me and the quality of my sobriety. I attend AA meetings. I have not worked the steps. I have met a few women who have become friends and who understand because they've been there, done that. They help me puzzle out the lingering thoughts. I'd say go and see what you think. Give it a few meetings before deciding. Because different meetings have different qualities. It's not like the health club, you don't sign a contract. Kick in a dollar and it's almost free.
So, welcome. Get to know people on here. And again welcome.
I found I needed more support than just on my own. Because even now at 15 months I have fleeting thoughts that a glass of wine would be nice. And I never saw the point of A glass either. The bottle plus more, thank you very much. I read and post on here. It gets me out of my own head, gets me thinking about what worked for me and the quality of my sobriety. I attend AA meetings. I have not worked the steps. I have met a few women who have become friends and who understand because they've been there, done that. They help me puzzle out the lingering thoughts. I'd say go and see what you think. Give it a few meetings before deciding. Because different meetings have different qualities. It's not like the health club, you don't sign a contract. Kick in a dollar and it's almost free.
So, welcome. Get to know people on here. And again welcome.
Adventurer
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: Tuxedo Park, NY
Posts: 1,101
I have not been to AA, I might go in the future it can't hurt to give it a shot. Why not try all available tools?
I am sure I can't ever have another drink though because I am sure I will just go back to my old habits.
I am sure I can't ever have another drink though because I am sure I will just go back to my old habits.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: illinois
Posts: 907
welcome!
9 months. awesome!
AA methods are debated. i personally think that the 1st idea the founders had was the most important. that is that the afflicted work together to help each other. so, fellowship.
although i feel like staying off the bottle is my responsibility and that i have the power within me to do this, it is empowering to discuss things with others that have personal experience.
SR is where i find this most of the time. if i need face time, i have a couple of friends that have been through it also. ive found that helping others helps me. ive also found that talking to folks that have embraced recovery and feel better for it helps lift me up.
9 months. awesome!
AA methods are debated. i personally think that the 1st idea the founders had was the most important. that is that the afflicted work together to help each other. so, fellowship.
although i feel like staying off the bottle is my responsibility and that i have the power within me to do this, it is empowering to discuss things with others that have personal experience.
SR is where i find this most of the time. if i need face time, i have a couple of friends that have been through it also. ive found that helping others helps me. ive also found that talking to folks that have embraced recovery and feel better for it helps lift me up.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: MA
Posts: 23
Thanks so much for all your replies and thoughts. I think what I find missing in my life is a sort of community, or people who I can relate to in this sense. I've actually only told a couple of my friends, my two closest, that I have quit drinking bc I'm an alcoholic. I definitely still feel some shame about it. I know I shouldn't but I do. I have a fear of being judged I guess, so maybe that's why I'm looking for people who can understand and who get it. Maybe I'll find that here, I hope so. As far as AA, I think if I can get the nerve up, I will go to a meeting. I just have to get the courage.
New Life Sober
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: Noblesville, IN
Posts: 777
Hi Jenn
AA program is good for some people, I go to AA 3-5 days a week and it has help me through some tough times. Also, SR also helps me cause I can be on here 24/7. It really depends on you what you should do, all we can do on here is be supportive.
Welcome to SR!!
AA program is good for some people, I go to AA 3-5 days a week and it has help me through some tough times. Also, SR also helps me cause I can be on here 24/7. It really depends on you what you should do, all we can do on here is be supportive.
Welcome to SR!!
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