GoesWithTheFlow

After 33 days I have finally built up the courage to let people know that I have stopped drinking through facebook where I have many times gone and just made a mess of myself publicly.

You know what I find stupid about this is that I was actually embarrassed about letting people know I am going sober like going sober is a bad thing or something I need to be ashamed of... That is why it took me a long time to tell my friends.

Praying to God and given up drinking have positively impacted my life; many things in this sentence haven't been placed the way they have in a long while hahaha. Praying, positive, God, no drinking, lol.

I will admit this past week has been a challenge for me. I have made great steps in along this process and when the little devil starts whispering in my ear I shut him up before he starts shouting and I begin to manipulate my own logic to go ahead and drink.

There are places that I feel I should still avoid and that bothers me. Today I was agitated because the Galaxy was playing at home and I work a few blocks from there. In my head I was thinking I could stop by and tailgate or hit up a bar in th... then I remembered no, no I can't. I was really agitated and grumpy.

I came home and all four locks were on the door. I had my hands full of stuff and I felt like kicking the door in and start yelling. I said no, just relax man. You had a good day. The CEO is thinking of making you their full time controller. Good things are being said about you. Why are you mad for? That stopped me from kicking the door down but I was a bit to grumpy for my girl friend. But she puts on her cute faces and it begins to tear down my anger. If you guys would see her face you would know what I am saying.

I guess stress is building up and my quick fix has always been a beer. Now its just building fast but I have not kept up with stress relievers.

Dee74

I had a gig today - the other three guys went to the pub after - I could have gone but I didn't to and I wanted to get home.

There was a time I would have gone to the pub to 'prove' something about my recovery or my strength or my determination....but that time is long past.

I didn't want to go, and I didn't go. Feels good to do stuff like that.

Don't be bothered by it

as for stress...exercise is good, or a hobby you enjoy, a long bath, a funny movie....The sooner you start on alternative strategies stress, the better

D

BernieE

I hesitated to tell people until I felt confident it was going to stick. Nothing like facing your failure every time you logon to Facebook or see a call on your phone! On the positive side, telling makes you more accountable to yourself. It takes guts. And you did it.

I agree with Dee, time to develop some ways for dealing with stress. Exercise is great. Meditation too. Video games, puzzles, crosswords, sudoku, anything that you get lost in is good as long as it doesn't become obsessive.

Congratulations on 33 days!

Soberwolf

Precisely what D said i can go into any place and be fine with ppl drinking doesnt bother me but out of personal choice i just dont as it has no attraction for me at all 0%

PurpleKnight

For me announcements on Face Book wasn't something I did, I took it day by day, each situation with people I found myself in and dealt with it on a case by case basis, the last thing you might want is the added pressure from people commenting and all of the expectation that comes with such an announcement.

Sobriety though does come with some tough decisions, what people to hang out with, what places to go, what activities to get involved in, sport is something I still go to watch, but I now pass up the tailgate or the pre drinks at the bar.

I now show up later just before a game starts, have a coffee, enjoy the game, drive home and have a hangover free next morning, it's different, but accepting my incompatibility with alcohol makes it so, in the same way someone with a nut allergy doesn't have ice cream or chocolate with nuts in it, that's just the way it is, they don't end up hating the world over it!!

Great job on 33 Days!! Keep it going!!

nymets86

Bernie, this is EXACTLY where I am at. I'm fearful of telling people "I don't drink" since it's embarassing to admit I have this problem, but to a larger extent, the fact that if I fail to stay sober, I'll feel a lot worse about it since people will know I failed. As is, if I get hammered and do something dumb, it will kind of just be like what's happened every other time.

With that said, I know one of the reasons my brain is telling me not to confide in anyone is because my AV does want me to go back to drinking at some point. It would absolutely make me more accountable to sobriety if more than just my therapist and SR knew.

Anyway, sorry to draw attention to myself. GoesWith, that's awesome you had the guts to do that and congrats on 33 days sober.

Ambush1256

I envy you having the courage to be open with people. Just be careful as posting on facebook can be a problem if your employer or fellow employees can view it. Check your privacy settings, so only your friends can view it. I want to open up too but I'm afraid of the backlash. My wife and some of her family know about it. People at work suspect it, since I was reported acting "strange" and forced into counseling, for my strange behavior. I admitted to having a problem but was not specific as to what the problem was. Ridiculous denial, as they probably already know. The biggest reason I wanted to open up, recently, was because my neighbor's son OD on drugs 2 months ago. They had to use Narcan to bring him back. He has had problems with drug/alcohol addiction, for a couple of years. I'm friendly with him, he's a good guy and I really think it could help him, if I spoke to him about my own addiction. I haven't because I know how narrow minded people can be and how ignorant they are of the decease of alcoholism and I fear what the neighbors will think of me.

Finally, hello to a fellow accountant/controller. Nothing like a bad monthly closing to make you want to drink. As I was working on my monthly close, yesterday and it started to go sideways, I thought, 3 years ago, I would have been doing this with a bottle of water and Vodka next to me. 2 years ago, I would of been sober at work but picking up a bottle on the way home. 1 year ago, I would have gotten angry but would have gone home sober. Yesterday, I just laughed and rolled my eyes. For me, everything is better, being sober.

Anna

I agree with Ambush. I think if you're comfortable telling people, that's fine, but putting comments about your alcoholism on Facebook is another story.

Congratulations on 33 days sober.

VikingGF

I have not ever announced on social media that I stopped drinking, only because that invites too many "acquaintances" into my private business. My good friends know, and now it's not an issue in anyway what I do. It probably wasn't before, but don't we all think we are the center of the universe when we are drinking? I know I did.

As for not going places, for now, you have to do what you think is best for you. My worst place is home alone, and unfortunately, can't avoid that! So, we learn to make adjustments and move forward. It is seriously fabulous that you have 33 days. Good for you, keep going.

GoesWithTheFlow

Thank you for the support and concerns about my post on fb. My fb is private and my name is so common people have a hard time finding me. I keep no employers or colleagues on fb. I have a relatively small group of friends and acquaintances, not like 1,000, and I never keep anyone I don't know or have a connection with personally. Further I selected only people that have been witness to the destructive behavior on fb or people that at some point wanted to do business with to let them know that I was a mess and if they are willing I will show them that I am not just a drunk. I am a smart and caring guy that was lost for a while.

In the past I have said I was quitting and failed. This time I made sure I didn't fail in the time I normally do and then passed. I want people to know that I am going at this hard and that if I have been avoiding them this is the reason and I hope they can excuse me for a bit until I get stronger.

GoesWithTheFlow

My man you don't even know the hot mess that I have to go through at this job until I develop the accounting system. To sum up: this company never had any accounting system and there only records were containers full of mixed personal, non-profit, and business files that my team and I have so far spent two weeks sorting through. So far I have found that since the business started they had 47 business bank accounts. Oh and some of the personal bank statement have mixed transactions with business that I will have to split :/ I have to go back three years and create the system once it is done they are considering keeping me as their controller Wish me luck and if you have advice I am willing to hear it

GoesWithTheFlow

Don't be sorry! We can both learn from our peers here who can guide us on how they were able to approach this dilemma. We can't be the only ones who have felt this way. My best to you and your struggles.