Jen73

The first time I attend to AA, I was not sure if this is actually for me, so I decided to look online. I found SR, and other programs that I thought was fit for me. When I started lurking around SR and read about other peoples stories, I was like okay AA is like this only you are face to face with.

Since I been going to AA, I have really admit that I am Powerlessness over Alcoholic. Let’s just say that once an I takes a drink, a chemical reaction occurs within my body, setting off an intense craving for more. This craving doesn’t always occur, which is why some alcoholics can, on occasion, drink like normal people.

I am just getting into my 12 and 12 book and I am very pleased that I can understand and admit that I have a problem and I am powerless to alcohol.
If you put your mind to it, it will help you be ease on going through them.

I am grateful that I can be strong and find my way to keep me sober by saying I cant have alcohol and not dwell on it. March 4th will be my 30 dys and I have came along ways to fight what comes my way.

I just wanted to share this and your welcome to post what is powerless too you?

zerothehero

I have power over alcohol in that I can choose not to drink it because by drinking it I give it my power.

PurpleKnight

Once I drink then all bets are off!!

The only way to stay in control is to not have that 1st drink, life has been on the up ever since!!

Fly N Buy

At first I found this concept to be very foreign. As time goes by I find grace in the recognition I cannot control nor do I need to have domain over all things. The concept to me is in fact liberating and freeing.

Perhaps just the opposite of what I expected.

I am powerless over much more than just the ability to drink - but need to be accountable for that which I do have power over.

VikingGF

I was unable to control how I behaved when I drank so I finally accepted that and stopped drinking. Alcohol makes me powerless when I drink it, but if I don't drink it, I'm just fine.

Bailey3

I have no power over alcohol. Once I start I can't stop until I'm completely blacked out. There is no such thing as moderation. It's all or nothing. Yes I'm powerless over alcohol. Another member has the name"Lostmyoffswitch". That pretty much describes me to a T.

themadone

I am the same, do you get young people to AA. I just have the fear that some of the people will think we have lost more so he can't really be an alcoholic. I told one of my friends I had a problem and he said that because I was not living on the street and going cold turkey I was not an alcoholic. My first thought was sadomasochistic, to actually drink myself to death to prove him wrong. I tried but alas I am still here. Is there really no judgement?

Grungehead

Jen,

Step one reads: We admitted we were powerless over alcohol— that our lives had become unmanageable.

My history proved that every time I took the first drink I became powerless over how many more I would have. Might be 2, might be 20, but I didn't seem to have any choice in the matter after that first one. I also had a strong obsession to drink (some call it the AV or addictive voice), and I often seemed to take that first drink even after swearing off alcohol for good. So in that way I was powerless over the first drink as well. For me it was a repeated cycle I couldn't seem to break...the mental obsession, followed by taking the first drink, setting off physical cravings for more drinks...and rinse and repeat. When I was sober all I could think about was drinking, yet every time I drank I was miserable. AA talks about reaching a point where you can't live with or without alcohol and that's where I ended up.

Yeah so for me my obsession for alcohol when sober made me powerless over the first drink, and my "allergy" to alcohol made me powerless over how much I would drink after drinking the first one. They key for me was to find a way to stop the obsession. If I can find a way to not take that first drink then the rest takes care of itself. I found that through working the steps the obsession to drink has been removed and I am no longer powerless over that first drink.

If you notice in the first step it says "we were powerless over alcohol" and "our lives had become unmanageable". Notice that "were" and "had become" are in the past tense. It doesn't say we are powerless and our lives are unmanageable for a reason. It's because by the time we finish working the steps we have found a new power. If you plan on sticking with AA I suggest finding a sponsor that will take you through the steps without delay. The answer lies within them, or at least it did for me.

MelindaFlowers

Powerless to me means that once I start drinking alcohol my thinking and judgment goes out the window and who knows what will happen.

MelindaFlowers

One other thing that others said:

I would swear off drinking (and mean it) and then drink again that night. Pure insanity.

Hawks

Basically it's the inability to leave alcohol alone no matter how great the desire, combined with an inability to reliably say exactly how much alcohol you will drink once you commence.

I tried for about a decade to stop, I tried everything, therapy, fitness, counting drinks and on and on.

But when the heat came on, I always reverted back.

I would get months of sobriety up, but always bust.

Finally I gave up on giving up.

It was demoralising in the extreme.

I had kicked drugs relatively easily, a little will power and a few lifestyle changes..... No problem.

But booze had me beat.

When I read "powerless " I immediately thought "yeah that pretty much describes it"

aldo1981

Hi Jen73

Powerless for me was a bit different I had scheduled my life around alcohol I didn’t drink every day I drank Wednesday, Friday, Saturday and if I was struggling a Monday .

I would plan every aspect of my day and night when I was drinking and drink to get drunk and go to bed sleep get up go to work,,,,,,, The days I would not drink I was in a bad mood and really tired all the time with anxiety creeping in slowly before I was to drink again.

So powerless to me is when I drink it becomes part of my daily routine and I am powerless to function normally if I don’t have alcohol to accompany me.

As it is said don’t lift the first drink and you cant get drunk ,, that is a way of life for me now.

MelindaFlowers

Yes. Hawks is spot-on.

FreeOwl

powerlessness is giving up.

giving up your life, your happiness, your soul, your true nature - to a glass of poison - even when you tell yourself you won't.

anattaboy

If it helps you, by all means use it. I have never been able to control my intake of alcohol if I start and I could get to more. Obviously we were all able to stop (some with medical help) so utter powerlessness over alcohol's grip is incorrect but I will never consider experimenting again.

IOAA2

My long time sponsor, with over 40 years sober time introduced himself:

“I’m powerless over alcohol whether I drink it or not.”

BE WELL

Nowsthetime

Hello:

I make myself powerless when I drink. That's why I don't drink anymore!!!!