Jen73

I just got a call from the Child Services, I know that they are here to help. However, there are some things i like to keep out of my life. They want to come out next week for a family discussion on what our goals are as a family and what we been up too and what our the things we can do to not provent this to happen again.

Many people have told me to let them help you get what you need to do, I am going to let them know what i been doing, I go to two meeting a week, and i feel good about that. To tell you the truth counceling would not be a thing for me, I feel like these meetings i go too are my counceling and being on this forum helps me figure out things.

I just have a real bad feeling about this and i am not sure if its just me because i dont like CS to be apart of my family, I am just so overwhelmed with this stuff. I know it was my fault for the first place having them come into my family cause of my drinking.

I feel that things are going well for me that i ben sober and doing the things i am doing to prevent this whole drinking thing to happen again.

I just dont know what to say to them when we setup a appointment to discuss whatever. Just tell you, the child service came out 2/3/15 and they are just us back for a discussion.

Urgh!!

mavrick

I think i you just listen to what they have to say and keep calm, tell them what you have been doing and what you intend on doing then you will be fine.
There main priority will be to see if your children are in a safe environment. If you can show them that then you have nothing to worry about.

Wholesome

CS tried to get involved in my family after I left my husband because of domestic violence back in 2007... I was VERY uncomfortable having them involved in any of my decision making and did everything I could to make them go the **** away. The police called them without my consent after I was abused. I felt soooo violated by that! Like I didn't have enough to deal with, now I had CS knocking on my door.

I know other families who couldn't get rid of them. If I were you I would tell them as little as possible aside from that you are getting treatment and pulling it together. And keep doing those things!! The family should pull ranks and present an undivided front.

Hey just my opinion. I am the type who hate authority and govenment control.

Sebastian84

Hi Jen,

It's understandable that this meeting can be a bit daunting for you. From what I know, CS are generally dedicated to protecting children and young people from harm or who are at risk of harm, and whose parents cannot provide adequate care or protection for them.

My suggestion would be to listen to what they have to say, and tell them what you have told us - that you're making such positive strides to improve yourself, as well as the environment that your children are in. Tell them about the meetings, and that they have had a positive influence on your life and your ability to control your cravings, and that you intend to continue attending them.

There's been a thread or two in recent days (it might be on the second or third page of this forum), I think it was called 'Positive Energy Techniques', which discussed how to get yourself calm for a job interview so you don't panic. Maybe go have a read through that Jen, you might find something you can do to help you out before the meeting with CS?

Seb

Marcher13

Jen I totally understand what you are saying, you've put action in place and things have been going well for you for the last two weeks. I think that's probably what they want to hear -- how things are going for you. If you've put good action in place (as you have) then their visit will simply confirm that.

I'd suggest agreeing to the visit, that way everything is out in the open.

awuh1

It's normal to feel threatened in your situation. Nobody likes to have people looking over their shoulder.

Keep in mind that both you and CS have the same goal. You both want good things to happen for your kids. If you make it clear that you understand this, right from the beginning, then everyone can work together.

They might want you to do some things you don't think are necessary, or that you just would rather not do (counseling, parenting classes or perhaps seeing a substance abuse counselor). Not to worry. If you want what's best for your kids, if you are honest and if you make this all crystal clear to anyone you talk to, then good things will happen.

anattaboy

Best wishes with staying positive. Been there, glad to be rid of them. Fortunately, a trusted family member lives a few blocks away so we had an easy go. Looking back, we've given the authorities good reason to be in our lives and now, by not drinking anymore, can make it through anything. You will feel the same way in a few months. I was just looking at my new online health history and found a "mentally unstable" episode from 2010 when I had to say I would hurt myself to get a 3 day detox w/out insurance. Once I got in I didn't feel quite the same about that decision. Wife and I had a good laugh about that.

Jen73

Well today is the day that CPS is coming to the house.

I just gotta remember to be calm, I just want this over with.

I am not going to say much just what I been doing to prevent me to drink. Even my daughter and my husband has notice that I am doing good and can tell that the poison is out of me.

Give me good lucks guys, and thanks for the courage that I can do this.

Sweaty palms

Carlotta

Sending you strength and prayers. You will be fine
If you start panicking a bit, remember to recenter your mind to the moment and to take deep belly breathes

(((hugs)))

SoberLeigh

Wishing you the best, Jen, and sending prayers.

Coldfusion

Jen, I suspect that most of what they are checking on is to see if you are sober now. Congratulations on three weeks! Because you are not drinking, many things in your life will now be able to improve.

Esspee

Prayers going up for you x

saoutchik

Best wishes Jen73

Soberwolf

Good luck Jen

Jupiters

viel gluck Jen!

tokidoki

All of my best wishes, dear.

JT0626

Jen,

Sending you positive vibes! It can be scary & overwhelming to have CS knocking at your door. Just keep up wtih your good work...it will all work out!

Hugs to you!

anattaboy

They can't eat you and really don't like taking kids out of their home. Sounds like you are taking care of you and that makes for a good caretaker. (I'm only 8+ months ahead of you and am primary caregiver to my kids). It's a big change. They kinda wish I wasn't so keen on keeping track of their homework online and making them do chores now for spending money but parenting gets little applause when you're doing it right. Gotta go--4yr old is too quiet.....

Jen73

Well things went well today, they just wanted to see how things are and how we are preventing me to relapse. One thing they did say is the next time they get a call that they will really get involved and take my kids away.

So, its on me to not drink and attend to my meetings. I know I can do this and thanks for you guys to keep me going.

Gonnachange

Glad the meeting went well. The rules going forward have been laid out so you know what you have to do and from reading your writings I'm sure you will.