SeriousKarma

For the sake of anonymity I'll leave out the details.

I was accused of doing something at work that went against the policies of the company I work for. My employer put me on leave this last week while they sorted it out. They determined that I hadn't done anything wrong and I'll be going back to work tomorrow.

I should be happy. I'm hurting for money, and even though it's only a part time job at low pay, I need all the money I can get.

But I'm bummed.

I really, really, really don't want to go back tomorrow. Or ever. Partially because I don't want to face the stares of coworkers who, more than likely, only got incorrect, embellished, bits of the story. But, mostly because I simply hate that job. It's exhausting and demeaning. Exhausting I could handle. Demeaning I could handle. But both?

And further more, nobody there gets me. (I know, I'm whining). I get along with most everyone. I have fun with my co-workers. We laugh a fair amount of the time. But, still, I feel like I'm always accommodating them and their personalities. Like a square peg in a round hole. Or like that one foreigner at a table of locals. I don't get them anymore then they get me. No judgement here. It's just not a good fit.

Although I was upset about the thought of having a black mark on my employment history, I was excited about being forced to move forward. I've got to get this show on the road.

I don't want to settle for being unhappy anymore. I don't have any alcoholics in my life to blame. Now it's down to me. Cr@p! Pressure!!!

Ugh. I'm lacking in a lot of the hard skills that employers are looking for. Hardly any computer skills, get paper cuts when I file. Can only add on an abacus.

Here are my main skills: I'm the ex-wife of an addict with a very good singing voice.

Unfortunately I see very few job sites with postings that read: BLUES SINGERS NEEDED.

I've talked to an employment counselor, and an education counselor, and I'm thinking about going back to school. But if anyone wants to chime in with words of wisdom or support, I'm all ears. Especially if any of you have started new career ventures when you're a bit older.

LexieCat

My very first job after college (I waited three years to go back for law school) was as a technical writer. I was very excited, even by the salary--a big six bucks an hour (yeah, this was the late 70s and I could afford an apartment of my own on that). But after a year or so of feeling adrift, like I was expected to produce these manuals but with no real guidance or supervision to speak of, I started to get nervous, and stressed, and dreaded going to work. When they started talking "possible" layoffs, I updated my resume and went to a temp agency that handled tech workers and got a contract position at another company. By then I was playing with the idea of law school, plus I was getting married in a year, so I just took one contract tech writing position after another until it was time to start school.

It wasn't until they started talking layoffs that I realized I COULD leave. It wasn't a disgrace, and it wasn't that I couldn't do the work, but the place I was working was a bad fit for me. It took the prospect of "involuntarily" leaving for me to realize I'd already stayed past my "best by" date.

So maybe this is your soul telling you it is time to go, and to put more effort into dreaming up where you want to be, and what you want to do with the rest of your life.

Incidentally, law school was three years of mostly unmitigated misery, but I wound up with a career that I LOVED and would not have traded for anything. So it was TOTALLY worth it.

LexieCat

BTW, Karma, you are an EXCELLENT writer. Have you ever considered something like copywriting or freelance writing? Or even tech writing--much of that is just translating the dense, complicated, snore-worthy into clear, lively, readable prose?

Flavia2

Lexi, I was thinking the exact same thing!

sauerkraut

Flavia and Lexie beat me to it! A related idea: if you have a Master's degree in English or something similar, you may be qualified to teach English at a local community college. Actually, if you have a Master's in anything, you may be qualified to teach at a cc in that field. Folks often start out with just a course or two (adjunct) but you might like it and hey, with Obama's recent proposals, the full time job opportunities may be there within the next few years.

maia1234

SK- I just switched my job this past Monday. I was living in Hxll with the old company. I found a job at a church and LOVE it. The people are amazingly kind. I just never thought I could find a place like this.

Maybe it is your time to move forward and find something more rewarding for you. Go for it and see what happens. We all have to take on scary things..... Good luck !!!!

SeriousKarma

Thanks, I've never really thought about writing. In fact, I pretty much only started "writing" here on SR, because I don't have you all to talk to face to face.

I was working on a Bachelors in Theatre Arts many years ago. Unfortunately, I never completed the degree. Life took me in a different direction. If I went back to school it wouldn't be for Theatre. Even in my twenties I found acting student irritating. I can only imagine the rashes I'd break out in if I had to surround myself with them now.

I talked to an education counselor yesterday. I had questions about trade school, job retraining, etc. She suggested that I first figure out what military benefits I'm entitled to due to my STBXAH retiring disabled. Then, after knowing how much money I'm dealing with, make a decision.

I thought it was a good suggestion, but it's going to take a while to crunch the numbers. In the meantime I want to be putting my feelers out there and see what people think.

SeriousKarma

Congratulations Maia!

This is what I'm talking about. I've had good jobs and bad jobs. There's no reason for any of us to be miserable. Right?

(Now if I could just convince my creditors........)

zoso77

What is your bliss?

SeriousKarma

I can sing a mean torch song.

If I could play an instrument I'd claim a spot on a corner, put out a hat, and sing the day away. Let the money come rolling in . I'd be happy as a clam.

zoso77

I'm a rippin' guitar player. If I could make the same money doing that as I do as an engineer, I would.

That doesn't mean that I don't like engineering. I do, and there are times that I love it because I get to see some cool stuff that most of the public will never see. But it's not the same rush I get from playing guitar.

If you don't like what you're doing, that's no way to live. Maybe it's time for a change?

NWGRITS

I freelance. You work as much or as little as you like. I also transcribe. If you want some leads for at least a little extra $$$, just let me know.

Duckygirl1

Have you ever thought about giving singing lessons specializing in torch songs? How about open mics at clubs? I have a couple friends who sing at restaurants that have pianos.

I'm a chef and downright sick of it for lots of reasons. I'm trying to get back into freelance writing myself. You can start with the local free papers. Usually they don't pay much, but you get a by line and a name started. Also, blog writing is getting popular. I subscribe to a couple that solicit for stories. You never know!

LexieCat

Well, if it interests you at all, I'd consider looking into it. I'm serious--I am a true snob when it comes to writing (for my professional work, that is--I'm much more casual in my writing on SR), and I think you have real talent. In addition to the technical aspects of it, you write with flair and personality. My constant legal writing has made my own style rather dull most of the time--of course, I'm usually writing for other legal professionals who--sadly--eat, drink, sleep and breathe dull.

SeriousKarma

Lexie, you're doing wonders for my ego right now. Better watch it though, or I'm likely to cause a scene at that job tomorrow. "Take your job and shove it. Lexie says I string me together some perty words. So, screeeeeeeeeew you!

I'm am going to think about this a bit, though. I honestly never thought of writing as a skill in my toolbox. Maybe I should rethink that.

Duckygirl- I have thought about giving lessons. I think I would need to get a few years of music training under my belt before I would be marketable as a teacher. Of course, that depends on how much money I have coming in for school. Not sure how to teach someone how to sing such a "feelings" based type of music though. There's a part of me that has toyed with the idea of teaching vocals through the use of music appreciation. In other words learn to sing better by listening better.

Lots to think about.

NWGRITS

SeriousKarma, try Textbroker. They'll have you do a writing sample and then give you a rating (I'm a 4-star because I am not a technically trained professional writer, who are 5-stars), which allows you to write for projects within your rating. I do mostly travel and wedding pieces, which is due to my background in hospitality and event planning. They have a little bit of everything, though. Automotive, beauty, legal, IT, marketing, and the list goes on. I'm on two writing teams, and clients can choose to issue you direct order pieces, which pay more than the average project.

SparkleKitty

SK, as the holder of a BA in Theatre Arts that did absolutely nothing to get me the fulfilling day job I enjoy today, I can safely guarantee you're not missing anything!

Seren

I don't think I've ever said this before but "Sorry to hear you have a job."

I think if you keep your eyes and ears open, you will find something much better than a job where you are falsely accused of nefarious conduct! Good luck!!

SeriousKarma

That got my morning started with a laugh!

Thank you for you sincere condolences, Seren.

Now it's off to work I go. Ugh... Keep sending me positive thoughts, guys. Thank God it's Friday.

redatlanta

Oh man I hate that feeling…..

Godh you have so many good tips here. When I left my career legal field (because I hated it) I intended to go back to school - for what I didn't know. While pondering what I wanted to do with my life I went back to working for Christian Dior as a makeup artist which I had done in college. I also got a second job waiting tables as the first one wasn't paying enough.

Long story short I launched a career in makeup artistry. Left that counter job after a year and went freelance still maintaining my waiter job which paid very well. About a year and half in I nailed a dream job, left the restaurant and stayed in that position for 15 years. Which gets me to today owning my own studio.

My suggestion is to find something affiliated with what you love to do every day. Secondly, waiting tables is a great job to come up with cash NOW. Flexible work hours, ability to work nights or days, and cash in hand every day. Its my fall back if something ever happened. Restaurants will take peeps with little to no experience. I was making 800 - 1000 a week at a busy restaurant back in the 90's.

Good luck today!