Fate2012

My AH and I have been separated for the last 2 months. Before officially filing for divorce I decided to have a talk with the hubby about giving it one more try, take things slow and go to therapy. He thought it was a good idea and I opened up my heart just a little bit b/c I still didn't know if I was doing the right thing. He had lied and betrayed me so many times that I was scared but wanted to keep the family together.
So he has been staying at his mom's house or so I thought. He comes over every morning to watch the kids while im at work and leaves when I get home. So this morning he wasn't there and I called his cell phone and I heard him say oh **** and some other cuss words THEN I heard a woman's voice say "is there anything I can do" then the phone hung up. I called back about 2 minutes later and he said that he was on his way and when I asked where he was, he said on his way.
Well, when he walked in this morning, I asked him who the woman was and he said it was the radio. I asked again and got the same response. Even when he is pushed in the corner he still lies and I guess he thinks im a complete idiot that I would fall for that. I then told him he hadn't changed and that I had enough, we are done and he thought that was a good idea. I was proud of myself for not cussing b/c my inner self felt like being a sailor.
I'm just so disappointed that this once again happened and he is a true, selfish jerk. I am now going to go ahead and file in the next few weeks. I do know I deserve better and so do my sweet boys.

Off subject a bit but my AH has gone to those smoke/vapor shops recently. Can you smoke pot or crushed pills using those e-cigs? He is a non-smoker so I was just curious why he would be there.

Thanks for letting me vent. He is now losing his family for some hussy and whatever his drug(s) of choice are.
Please prayer for my family. Thanks again:

hopeful4

Ugh. I am so sorry. It's so hard when you open your heart to trust a little and that gets taken advantage of.

I know some of the kids here find a way to do drugs through those things, but I have no idea what or how. Just one more tool being abused.

Tight hugs.

zoso77

I'm sad that this has happened. But I can't say I'm surprised. When someone's moral and ethical compass is disabled via chemical means, that person is capable of anything. My hope is that you don't look at what he's done as a reflection of you. He is what he is, and he'll likely never change.

Be safe. Keep us posted.

Lovenjoy

boy did this cause me flashbacks! the addict lying even when faced with truth and they do it with a straight face. like a little kid hiding behind their hands and believing you can't see them...

i'm sorry this is where the road led and i'm sending good thoughts your way that you and your boys can live more peacefully on a new path.

Jorgenss

Lies tend to be a common trait. I am sorry this happened to you. Best of luck and take care of your children.

Fate2012

What do you all do to not focus on your addict? I want to move forward but it's so hard to block him out.

seasaw

fate - I had to just do nothing for the first couple of weeks. it's like my mind was just a big empty void and i had to experience the stillness before deciding, marble by marble, what i wanted to put back into it. i literally just sat on my balcony and stared out at the trees and birds and just went blank for a while. it was all i could do. and i'm really glad i gave myself permission to do that.

then i went on a 10 day cruise with my best friend :P