The Language of Letting Go, Feb. 7
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The Language of Letting Go, Feb. 7
FEBRUARY 7
You are reading from the book "The Language of Letting Go."
Owning Our Power
We need to make a distinction between powerlessness and owning our power.
The first step in recovery is accepting powerlessness. There are some things we can't do, no matter how long or hard we try. These things include changing other people, solving their problems, and controlling their behavior. Sometimes, we feel powerless over ourselves--what we feel or believe, or the effects of a particular situation or person on us.
It's important to surrender to powerlessness, but it's equally important to own our power. We aren't trapped. We aren't helpless. Sometimes it may feel like we are, but we aren't. We each have the Higher Power-given power, and the right, to take care of ourselves in any circumstance, and with any person. The middle ground of self-care lies between the two extremes of controlling others and allowing them to control us. We can walk that ground gently or assertively, but in confidence that it is our right and responsibility.
Let the power come to walk that path.
Today, I will remember that I can take care of my self. I have choices, and I can exercise the options I choose without guilt.
©1990, Hazelden Foundation. All rights reserved.
You are reading from the book "The Language of Letting Go."
Owning Our Power
We need to make a distinction between powerlessness and owning our power.
The first step in recovery is accepting powerlessness. There are some things we can't do, no matter how long or hard we try. These things include changing other people, solving their problems, and controlling their behavior. Sometimes, we feel powerless over ourselves--what we feel or believe, or the effects of a particular situation or person on us.
It's important to surrender to powerlessness, but it's equally important to own our power. We aren't trapped. We aren't helpless. Sometimes it may feel like we are, but we aren't. We each have the Higher Power-given power, and the right, to take care of ourselves in any circumstance, and with any person. The middle ground of self-care lies between the two extremes of controlling others and allowing them to control us. We can walk that ground gently or assertively, but in confidence that it is our right and responsibility.
Let the power come to walk that path.
Today, I will remember that I can take care of my self. I have choices, and I can exercise the options I choose without guilt.
©1990, Hazelden Foundation. All rights reserved.
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For those at CR, and anyone else (Higher Power works here, too), I thought this scripture helped solidify this in my mind:
"For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind." 2Tm:1:7
Thanks Honeypig, this really spoke to me this morning!
"For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind." 2Tm:1:7
Thanks Honeypig, this really spoke to me this morning!
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Originally Posted by Katchie 
"For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind." 2Tm:1:7
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Originally Posted by honeypig
Katchie, I have no religious background whatsoever, have never read scripture, but that quote is wonderful. Thanks so much for sharing it. Here's my new desktop:
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The middle ground of self-care lies between the two extremes of controlling others and allowing them to control us. We can walk that ground gently or assertively, but in confidence that it is our right and responsibility.
This!!!! I have this woman who is the mother of one of my students (I am a preschool teacher), and she is going through a nasty divorce. Coming to SR and doing my own healing, I am able to see this woman's actions as controlling. And it resonates with me. She is so stuck in that muck right now that she is trying to have us teachers write down her child's behavior on only Wednesdays so that she can present it to the courts as evidence that when her child is with dad on Tuesdays, her child comes home "out of control", and it's dad's fault. And this woman is sooo frazzled and constantly talks about her situation and all of the things she is doing to control the situation.... I found myself giving her the only words of advice that had any real meaning...
"Take care of yourself and try to detach from your ex's behavior."
She looked at me in shock. But I could feel the truth of it as I said it.... Nice to be able to apply what I am learning!
This!!!! I have this woman who is the mother of one of my students (I am a preschool teacher), and she is going through a nasty divorce. Coming to SR and doing my own healing, I am able to see this woman's actions as controlling. And it resonates with me. She is so stuck in that muck right now that she is trying to have us teachers write down her child's behavior on only Wednesdays so that she can present it to the courts as evidence that when her child is with dad on Tuesdays, her child comes home "out of control", and it's dad's fault. And this woman is sooo frazzled and constantly talks about her situation and all of the things she is doing to control the situation.... I found myself giving her the only words of advice that had any real meaning...
"Take care of yourself and try to detach from your ex's behavior."
She looked at me in shock. But I could feel the truth of it as I said it.... Nice to be able to apply what I am learning!
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