Hi there
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Join Date: Feb 2015
Posts: 7
Hi there
I guess if I'm successful this time, today will be day one sober. I drank my last beer I had left from the night before yesterday morning. Felt sick from withdrawals most of the day. Still feel pretty crappy today; it doesn't help that my right tonsil is swollen to the size and feeling of a golf ball and it hurts to talk or swallow, but other than that it hasn't bothered me much. I tried about a week ago and I made it four days. Since I started drinking really heavily at 17 (I had drunk a lot before then too, but not on such a regular basis because it had been harder to get) I've only managed to stay sober for about a week when I try to quit. That's my record. Seven days. Then I get so crushingly depressed and anxious, or I'm on my pink cloud and get tempted by someone, and all that hard work and pain and feeling sick goes out the window and I'm right back at square one. I'm almost 24. I've lost what should have been my best years to this. I've spent all my savings, lost my job, most of my family doesn't speak to me, and I have few friends. I have no support system whatsoever and few prospects. When I reach out for help the answer is usually "I want to help you, but I don't know how." if they're even sympathetic at all, which they often aren't. So there's my situation right now, and I'm trying on my own again. I really don't want to fail. I want to be healthy, not be an addict. I'm going to have to learn to live all over again, to forget the lessons and way of living I was taught that brought me to this dark place. To be my own teacher, my own support, my own friend...because everyone else has either led me astray, abandoned me, or both. I guess that's why I'm here, I'm hoping someone can relate. Thanks for reading.
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Join Date: Aug 2003
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Originally Posted by Titian 
. I'm going to have to learn to live all over again, to forget the lessons and way of living I was taught that brought me to this dark place. To be my own teacher, my own support, my own friend...because everyone else has either led me astray, abandoned me, or both.
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