alcoholic or just not the brightest?
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Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: PA
Posts: 55
alcoholic or just not the brightest?
I mean the title pretty much says it. I can't figure out whether I'm sort of kind of maybe just a little but alcoholic or just making poor decisions for awhile & just in a "phase".
I started taking my drinking seriously around thanksgiving. Ill have between 2-8 drinks a day at my estimates. Most days are towards the upper ends, except for days I'm running low on supplies (being underage sucks) On the days I don't drink I feel worse than hell. Literally, can't get out of bed type bad. I get real bad anxiety & started getting insane panic attacks all the time too. I told my friend that these panic attacks were making school & work very difficult & she suggested I stop drinking. I agreed to stop for 2 weeks as a trial period, but I caved on day 5 (monday) right when I started feeling good again. I've been alternating drinking days & recovery days from hell since. On the days where my panic attacks are real bad & I can't get out of bed cuz I feel too sick I feel like maybe I have a problem & maybe I shouldn't drink, but then the minute I feel like myself again I start drinking. Its a terrible cycle. I feel like I could stop if I wanted to, the trouble is is that as soon as I feel good again I don't see the need to stop anymore, until my next panic attack that is. Is it just a phase coupled with some poor decision making skills right now or do I actually have reason to be legitimately concerned about my recent habits? I mean I haven't completely effed up work or school yet or anything major, but on my bad days I feel like I'm headed there and I don't want to wreck myself. Any thoughts?
I started taking my drinking seriously around thanksgiving. Ill have between 2-8 drinks a day at my estimates. Most days are towards the upper ends, except for days I'm running low on supplies (being underage sucks) On the days I don't drink I feel worse than hell. Literally, can't get out of bed type bad. I get real bad anxiety & started getting insane panic attacks all the time too. I told my friend that these panic attacks were making school & work very difficult & she suggested I stop drinking. I agreed to stop for 2 weeks as a trial period, but I caved on day 5 (monday) right when I started feeling good again. I've been alternating drinking days & recovery days from hell since. On the days where my panic attacks are real bad & I can't get out of bed cuz I feel too sick I feel like maybe I have a problem & maybe I shouldn't drink, but then the minute I feel like myself again I start drinking. Its a terrible cycle. I feel like I could stop if I wanted to, the trouble is is that as soon as I feel good again I don't see the need to stop anymore, until my next panic attack that is. Is it just a phase coupled with some poor decision making skills right now or do I actually have reason to be legitimately concerned about my recent habits? I mean I haven't completely effed up work or school yet or anything major, but on my bad days I feel like I'm headed there and I don't want to wreck myself. Any thoughts?
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 465
Welcome 
They say if you have to ask if you have s problem, you probably do. You're very young and its good that you're askimg yourself this important question now.
Everyone has a different story, but a common factor remains: this disease escalates. If you're not even of drinking age and are drinking enough on a daily basis to feel panic-y and ill, I'd consider that a red flag. A big one.
Most of us here also went through "a phase" and experienced that kind of thinking. For almost all of us, it wasn't and we needed to stop. I'm on day one yet again after I yet AGAIN convinced myself I could just be smart about it and drink socially like I used to. Turns out it is simply not an option for me.
Best of luck to you, hope you stick around for support <3
They say if you have to ask if you have s problem, you probably do. You're very young and its good that you're askimg yourself this important question now.
Everyone has a different story, but a common factor remains: this disease escalates. If you're not even of drinking age and are drinking enough on a daily basis to feel panic-y and ill, I'd consider that a red flag. A big one.
Most of us here also went through "a phase" and experienced that kind of thinking. For almost all of us, it wasn't and we needed to stop. I'm on day one yet again after I yet AGAIN convinced myself I could just be smart about it and drink socially like I used to. Turns out it is simply not an option for me.
Best of luck to you, hope you stick around for support <3
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: illinois
Posts: 907
i could have wrote your post ten years ago. it got worse. there's a very good chance those panic attacks are a signal that your system is not agreeing with what you're doing.
book suggestion: alcohol lied to me by craig beck. an easy read. it will speak directly to what you're dealing with at this stage.
welcome aboard. this site is great. good folks. little judgement.
book suggestion: alcohol lied to me by craig beck. an easy read. it will speak directly to what you're dealing with at this stage.
welcome aboard. this site is great. good folks. little judgement.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: New England
Posts: 1,926
Originally Posted by Alphabet 
Welcome They say if you have to ask if you have s problem, you probably do. You're very young and its good that you're askimg yourself this important question now. Everyone has a different story, but a common factor remains: this disease escalates. If you're not even of drinking age and are drinking enough on a daily basis to feel panic-y and ill, I'd consider that a red flag. A big one. Most of us here also went through "a phase" and experienced that kind of thinking. For almost all of us, it wasn't and we needed to stop. I'm on day one yet again after I yet AGAIN convinced myself I could just be smart about it and drink socially like I used to. Turns out it is simply not an option for me. Best of luck to you, hope you stick around for support <3
They say if you have to ask if you have s problem, you probably do. You're very young and its good that you're askimg yourself this important question now. Everyone has a different story, but a common factor remains: this disease escalates. If you're not even of drinking age and are drinking enough on a daily basis to feel panic-y and ill, I'd consider that a red flag. A big one. Most of us here also went through "a phase" and experienced that kind of thinking. For almost all of us, it wasn't and we needed to stop. I'm on day one yet again after I yet AGAIN convinced myself I could just be smart about it and drink socially like I used to. Turns out it is simply not an option for me. Best of luck to you, hope you stick around for support <3Honestly, in my opinion, it sounds like you have a serious alcohol problem. It scares me that you are so young and having the problems you are having. I was in outpatient treatment with a young girl (21 years old) who got Hepatitis C when she was 17 from drinking too much and now she is dead. Don't mess around with this. You are young...you have so much life to live. Trust me....it only gets worse!
I'm worried for you! Can you talk to your family, a doctor, get a treatment evaluation?
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 20
You sound like me a couple years ago. You aren't me and everyone has their own experience, but how you just explained your drinking habits are exactly how I would explain mine when my alcoholism started to become noticeable.I'll tell you where I am right now.I don't consume alcohol anymore, it consumes me.My 2-8 drinks give or take every night has become 15 minimum and the maximum I cant give you because I'm blacked out drunk by that point. if I dont drink enough and go to bed I wake up at 3 in the morning, full blown panic attack, covered in sweat and I have to drink 2-8 beers just to go back to bed so I can sleep for 2 more hours and make it to work. I go to work every day smelling like a booze cannon. I woke up this morning from a 3 day bender and I have ruined my life with this one. my girl friend is fed up. I missed a very important day at work to get a cwb test where there was a welding inspector scheduled to come in and I could get certified to do welds that I cant do with out it, and the company wants me to have it ( I missed it last time for the same reason ). If you're questioning weather or not you're an alcoholic you probably are, and the proof that you are...where it takes you, is not worth it. do yourself a huge favor and assume that you are. whats the point in drinking anyways? even for people that aren't alcoholics. I categorize alcohol with the A bomb for detrimental discoveries to humanity. Just nip it in the butt kid. I have been trying to moderate my drinking for 3 years. it's been the worst 3 years of my life. and despite my efforts it keeps getting worse.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,436
I mean the title pretty much says it. I can't figure out whether I'm sort of kind of maybe just a little but alcoholic or just making poor decisions for awhile & just in a "phase".
I spent years in a cycle where I feel good so I drank...then I felt bad and drank...then I felt good again and drank...
No matter what you call it I was slowly destroying myself.
You're young and you have your whole life ahead of you. Don't screw things up getting further and further into this cycle by drinking away the decades like I did.
Have you anyone you can turn to for support? friends, family, Dr, teachers, student support, guidance counsellors?
D
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 251
It doesn't matter what you are. I'm not an alcoholic I just made stupid choices I didn't NEED that stuff and if I had to do something I didn't drink but otherwise I had a drink in my hand and it was progressing to being an alcoholic. Wherever you are it's about stopping and making the choice to get better good luck
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NC
Posts: 1,737
DD,
I can relate - that's how it was for me. The hard thing is this: if you are an alcoholic (and I would bet that's the case from your OP) it continues to get worse. The anxiety, the binges, the hangovers, and most of all - the consequences. But until you absolutely believe that you must quit drinking, it's almost impossible to stay stopped because it takes effort on a daily basis to become sober.
I can relate - that's how it was for me. The hard thing is this: if you are an alcoholic (and I would bet that's the case from your OP) it continues to get worse. The anxiety, the binges, the hangovers, and most of all - the consequences. But until you absolutely believe that you must quit drinking, it's almost impossible to stay stopped because it takes effort on a daily basis to become sober.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 3
Originally Posted by drinkingdinos
I mean the title pretty much says it. I can't figure out whether I'm sort of kind of maybe just a little but alcoholic or just making poor decisions for awhile & just in a "phase". I started taking my drinking seriously around thanksgiving. Ill have between 2-8 drinks a day at my estimates. Most days are towards the upper ends, except for days I'm running low on supplies (being underage sucks) On the days I don't drink I feel worse than hell. Literally, can't get out of bed type bad. I get real bad anxiety & started getting insane panic attacks all the time too. I told my friend that these panic attacks were making school & work very difficult & she suggested I stop drinking. I agreed to stop for 2 weeks as a trial period, but I caved on day 5 (monday) right when I started feeling good again. I've been alternating drinking days & recovery days from hell since. On the days where my panic attacks are real bad & I can't get out of bed cuz I feel too sick I feel like maybe I have a problem & maybe I shouldn't drink, but then the minute I feel like myself again I start drinking. Its a terrible cycle. I feel like I could stop if I wanted to, the trouble is is that as soon as I feel good again I don't see the need to stop anymore, until my next panic attack that is. Is it just a phase coupled with some poor decision making skills right now or do I actually have reason to be legitimately concerned about my recent habits? I mean I haven't completely effed up work or school yet or anything major, but on my bad days I feel like I'm headed there and I don't want to wreck myself. Any thoughts?
When I walked into my first AA meeting I knew deep down that I had a problem with alcohol. But I kept saying that I haven't had any DUI's, haven't been ares dyed, no accidents, still make it work. And then someone said you haven't had any of those things happen YET.
You are so young and I hope you can get help if you think you need it. I also suffer from anxiety/panic attacks and they are so much worse fate a night of drinking.
Good luck and keep coming back.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 465
Originally Posted by gardengnome426
How are you doing? You said one thing that really stood out to me: that very important word YET.
When I walked into my first AA meeting I knew deep down that I had a problem with alcohol. But I kept saying that I haven't had any DUI's, haven't been ares dyed, no accidents, still make it work. And then someone said you haven't had any of those things happen YET.
You are so young and I hope you can get help if you think you need it. I also suffer from anxiety/panic attacks and they are so much worse fate a night of drinking.
Good luck and keep coming back.
When I walked into my first AA meeting I knew deep down that I had a problem with alcohol. But I kept saying that I haven't had any DUI's, haven't been ares dyed, no accidents, still make it work. And then someone said you haven't had any of those things happen YET.
You are so young and I hope you can get help if you think you need it. I also suffer from anxiety/panic attacks and they are so much worse fate a night of drinking.
Good luck and keep coming back.
This is spot on. None of those things happened to me until a few of them did: jobless, homeless, no sense of self worth or hope. I went from a hard working, intelligent, young woman living comfortably on my own to being an unemployable drunk who crashed on couches. I only got my life back on track when I actively started to change.
Hope you're still with us and reading. We're all pulling for you.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: PA
Posts: 55
Thanks for the replies and support everyone. I'm feeling pretty good today (even made it to class on time!), which naturally means I also feel like drinking the day away. I guess at the end of the day I sort of realize I have issues with alcohol (not sure at what level, but I guess that doesn't much matter) & that I should address them, but at the same time I don't think I'm ready to call it quits yet. I can't.
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
Seems to me that people that don't have a problem with drinking don't make poor decisions regarding drinking on a regular basis.
I think it may be wise to get off,the fence with the kind of sort of maybe just a little bit stuff.
Definitions,titles, and levels don't matter. You may be at this level but they way ya describe yer drinkin.....yer headed for worse if ya dont do something about it and start now.
I hope ya make the decision,to do something about it. If like most of us, the alcohol is only a symptom of a much deeper problem that should be addressed.
I think it may be wise to get off,the fence with the kind of sort of maybe just a little bit stuff.
Definitions,titles, and levels don't matter. You may be at this level but they way ya describe yer drinkin.....yer headed for worse if ya dont do something about it and start now.
I hope ya make the decision,to do something about it. If like most of us, the alcohol is only a symptom of a much deeper problem that should be addressed.
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Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
Posts: 25,826
Welcome to the Forum!! 
Not being able to go 2 weeks without alcohol and not feeling great without alcohol should be sounding alarm bells! !
For me alcohol became so ingrained in my life that trying to take it out caused problems and when I couldn't stop then I knew I was in over my head.
If drinking is causing you problems, then it's time to make a few changes!!
Not being able to go 2 weeks without alcohol and not feeling great without alcohol should be sounding alarm bells! !
For me alcohol became so ingrained in my life that trying to take it out caused problems and when I couldn't stop then I knew I was in over my head.
If drinking is causing you problems, then it's time to make a few changes!!
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Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: New England
Posts: 1,926
Originally Posted by drinkingdinos
Thanks for the replies and support everyone. I'm feeling pretty good today (even made it to class on time!), which naturally means I also feel like drinking the day away. I guess at the end of the day I sort of realize I have issues with alcohol (not sure at what level, but I guess that doesn't much matter) & that I should address them, but at the same time I don't think I'm ready to call it quits yet. I can't.
Trudgin
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 6,348
Originally Posted by drinkingdinos
Thanks for the replies and support everyone. I'm feeling pretty good today (even made it to class on time!), which naturally means I also feel like drinking the day away. I guess at the end of the day I sort of realize I have issues with alcohol (not sure at what level, but I guess that doesn't much matter) & that I should address them, but at the same time I don't think I'm ready to call it quits yet. I can't.
Yet = you're eligible too, (me) is what I have learned. Alcohol doesn't care how old or wealthy we are. It doesn't discriminate and may not take away everything we cherish - but, it may and does in many instances.
Glad you're here, stick around long enough and read numerous threads/posts. Look for similarities in your experiences and others.
As Dee Suggested, seek help from someone you trust.
The cycle doesn't magically disappear
Kind Regards
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