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second failure

Old 01-22-2015, 04:14 AM
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second failure

instead of buying my usual 12 beers afterwork yesterday, i decided to buy 6 non-alcoholic beers and see if they could aid in me quiting alcohol. it was soooooooo nasty went straight out and got 12 beers i can't believe how hard this is
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Old 01-22-2015, 04:28 AM
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Hi NeedChange,

I'm sorry you're struggling. You're right, nothing easy about breaking this addiction, might be the hardest thing you've ever done.

Besides the mental obsession, it's important to realize it's an ingrain habit. Breaking these chains requires a break from the normal. That includes reaching out before you take the action, or do something (anything) other than the thing you always do. Buying NA beer is just the type thing that keeps you doing the same thing, feeding the habit/obsession. Try something completely different. When I first got sober, I would do anything (walking, browsing the shopping mall, or perusing the bookstore) besides going home.

All the best,
Methodman
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Old 01-22-2015, 04:38 AM
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Hi Needchange,

I found when I was trying to quit I did need change too. It was more than just not drinking. Like methodman said, I had to break the chains of deeply ingrained habit. I had to retrain my brain into different patterns of thinking and different habits. I had to live more consciously in my choices.

If your habit after work is to kick back and relax with a cold one you will need to switch that up. You may very well have to force yourself to do it. It will feel weird and uncomfortable at first. The longer you keep doing the new, the better it will feel. Keep trying. Take a different route home from work that doesn't take you past the liquor store. Go for a walk. Anything other than drinking. If you can, come on SR before leaving work to remind yourself.

Hang in there. You can do it.
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Old 01-22-2015, 04:41 AM
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Not drinking is easy.

Being content while not drinking can be difficult at first. I found it helpful to do different things to take my mind off what I would usually do after work - which was to drink.

You're not failing, you're learning. It's a big difference.
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Old 01-22-2015, 04:47 AM
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i'm not failing........i'm learning. thank you. i like that
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Old 01-22-2015, 04:51 AM
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Hi NeedChange the best way to do it is abstinance

Youl have to deal with cravings but i promise you it gets easier & life improves

i had to work at it tho & i still do

I sincerly promise you your life will improve itl take time but i know you can do

i didnt think i could do it when i got sober at 31 but here i am at 32 & 18 months sober
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Old 01-22-2015, 05:02 AM
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i decided to buy 6 non-alcoholic beers and see if they could aid in me quiting alcohol. it was soooooooo nasty went straight out and got 12 beers

From time to time there is a debate on this site about whether it is ok to drink non-alcoholic beer. Let this be a lesson to those who think it is an ok concept.
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Old 01-22-2015, 05:20 AM
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Originally Posted by NEEDCHANGE38 View Post
...i decided to buy 6 non-alcoholic beers and see if they could aid in me quiting alcohol.
They didn't aid you in quitting. What will?

If you done any reading of the thousands of posts here on SR, there are effective things you can do to ensure you quit drinking. Key point: doing them.

If you don't know what those things are that you can do, make your next post, "What can I do to ensure I make it past one night?"

Or walk into an AA meeting and ask someone there.
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Old 01-22-2015, 05:31 AM
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How badly do you want to quit needchange? Would you sacrifice your job for it? Your business? Would you give away all your money if someone could guarantee you sobriety? What about all your free time?
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Old 01-22-2015, 05:48 AM
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Originally Posted by NEEDCHANGE38 View Post
instead of buying my usual 12 beers afterwork yesterday, i decided to buy 6 non-alcoholic beers and see if they could aid in me quiting alcohol. it was soooooooo nasty went straight out and got 12 beers i can't believe how hard this is

Hi. No matter what path you choose, AA, XYZ, Here or anything the bottom line to becoming sober is standing in your shoes.
No one or thing can get a person sober until they honestly want to with NO reservations and do the work focusing on the goal as #1 in their life. The result can be great with a feeling never before achieved, but make no mistake it is work and not for just a few days. This work results in changes we make for long term sobriety, and a great chance in life.

BE WELL
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Old 01-22-2015, 06:16 AM
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Today i will grab a soda from the machine after work, then head to a 6:30 AA meeting. i do want this !
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Old 01-22-2015, 09:45 AM
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At the start I considered getting the non alcoholic wine too, but I realized I don't want to replace the wine, I want to change my life, alcohol can't be in it.
I think if I did drink the Non alcoholic stuff, it would be a quick transition back to the real stuff, probably the same day like you did
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Old 01-22-2015, 09:53 AM
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Originally Posted by ubntubnt View Post
How badly do you want to quit needchange? Would you sacrifice your job for it? Your business? Would you give away all your money if someone could guarantee you sobriety? What about all your free time?
Just speaking for myself:

I would sacrifice it all, wouldn't have any of those things if you were DRUNK!
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Old 01-22-2015, 09:59 AM
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I think it's not just the NA beer/wine, but the ritual involved.

I have gotten rid of glasses, etc that reminded me of my drinking days.
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Old 01-22-2015, 11:06 AM
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Breaking the habits is the tough bit but it can be done, there are many good flavours of soda, fruit juices, herbal teas out there, rather than going straight for what we know!!

You can do this!!
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Old 01-22-2015, 01:08 PM
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Originally Posted by Zebra1275 View Post
i decided to buy 6 non-alcoholic beers and see if they could aid in me quiting alcohol. it was soooooooo nasty went straight out and got 12 beers From time to time there is a debate on this site about whether it is ok to drink non-alcoholic beer. Let this be a lesson to those who think it is an ok concept.
really? I do it just fine but I accepted that it is all I can have quite awhile ago. It doesn't work for most but don't act like it can't work for some. They are an acquired taste just like most alcohol is.
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Old 01-22-2015, 01:10 PM
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Originally Posted by Anna View Post
I think it's not just the NA beer/wine, but the ritual involved. I have gotten rid of glasses, etc that reminded me of my drinking days.
exactly. I myself have replaced the real beer with NA beer but the ritual still exists and that's my next project. I don't understate the significance of nearly 3 months without alcohol but I don't act like I'm all better when the habit and ritual of drinking still exists.... It's about finding what works for YOU...
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Old 01-22-2015, 04:47 PM
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Originally Posted by upminer View Post
exactly. I myself have replaced the real beer with NA beer but the ritual still exists and that's my next project. I don't understate the significance of nearly 3 months without alcohol but I don't act like I'm all better when the habit and ritual of drinking still exists.... It's about finding what works for YOU...
I have thrown out all my drinking glasses and repainted the kitchen and put a new fridge in. It needed to be done anyway and I needed a new space, a new zone that was alcohol free. That's why I asked OP how much he wants it. You need to give it your best shot.
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Old 01-22-2015, 05:13 PM
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I'm glad you are ehading to a meeting need

Upminer - I'm glad that you feel NA beer is working for you, but for a lot of us it didn't work - including myself, and the OP of this thread.

it just kept me in a loop where I was doing the same old things I used to do with real beer, but *really* missing the buzz.
The outcome was inevitable for me.

Try not to take our failure in using the NA method personally, y'know?

D
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Old 01-22-2015, 05:55 PM
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Let us know how you did tonight. I hope you made it to the AA meeting and found support there.
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