The Language of Letting Go, Jan. 15
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The Language of Letting Go, Jan. 15
JANUARY 15
You are reading from the book "The Language of Letting Go."
Standing Up for Ourselves
We learn some behaviors have self-defeating consequences, while others have beneficial consequences. We learn we have choices.
--Beyond Codependency
It is so easy to come to the defense of others. How clear it is when others are being used, controlled, manipulated, or abused. It is so easy to fight their battles, become righteously indignant, rally to their aid, and spur them on to victory.
"You have rights," we tell them. "And those rights are being violated. Stand up for yourself, without guilt."
Why is it so hard, then, for us to rally to our own behalf? Why can't we see when we are being used, victimized, lied to, manipulated, or otherwise violated? Why is it so difficult for us to stand up for ourselves?
There are times in life when we can walk a gentle, loving path. There are times, however, when we need to stand up for ourselves--when walking the gentle, loving path puts us deeper into the hands of those who could mistreat us.
Some days, the lesson we're to be learning and practicing is one of setting boundaries. Some days, the lesson we're learning is that of fighting for our own rights and ourselves.
Sometimes, the lesson won't stop until we do.
Today, I will rally to my own cause. I will remember that it is okay to stand up for myself when that action is appropriate. Help me, Higher Power, to let go of my need to be victimized. Help me appropriately, and with confidence, stand up for myself.
©1990, Hazelden Foundation. All rights reserved.
You are reading from the book "The Language of Letting Go."
Standing Up for Ourselves
We learn some behaviors have self-defeating consequences, while others have beneficial consequences. We learn we have choices.
--Beyond Codependency
It is so easy to come to the defense of others. How clear it is when others are being used, controlled, manipulated, or abused. It is so easy to fight their battles, become righteously indignant, rally to their aid, and spur them on to victory.
"You have rights," we tell them. "And those rights are being violated. Stand up for yourself, without guilt."
Why is it so hard, then, for us to rally to our own behalf? Why can't we see when we are being used, victimized, lied to, manipulated, or otherwise violated? Why is it so difficult for us to stand up for ourselves?
There are times in life when we can walk a gentle, loving path. There are times, however, when we need to stand up for ourselves--when walking the gentle, loving path puts us deeper into the hands of those who could mistreat us.
Some days, the lesson we're to be learning and practicing is one of setting boundaries. Some days, the lesson we're learning is that of fighting for our own rights and ourselves.
Sometimes, the lesson won't stop until we do.
Today, I will rally to my own cause. I will remember that it is okay to stand up for myself when that action is appropriate. Help me, Higher Power, to let go of my need to be victimized. Help me appropriately, and with confidence, stand up for myself.
©1990, Hazelden Foundation. All rights reserved.
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Location: South Central USA
Posts: 1,478
Amen, Honeypig. I have often thought this of myself, especially when I post on others threads here on SR. I can have strong opinions about others situations as well as unbelief that they would allow those things to happen to them. I think, "what in the world! I'd never let that go on!" But, the truth is, when the rose colored glasses are removed, I have indeed let those things go on, but don't have the same strong conviction as when I typed a response for someone else.
I've seen changes in myself that I'm thankful for. Not enough changes but enough to give me some peace. I'm hoping my superwoman will emerge with more time and healing.
Thanks for your post, it is SO true!
I've seen changes in myself that I'm thankful for. Not enough changes but enough to give me some peace. I'm hoping my superwoman will emerge with more time and healing.
Thanks for your post, it is SO true!
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