freetosmile

Step 3: Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

How do I feel about turning my life over to a Higher Power for guidance?
I feel relieved actually. I would be great to have guidance, because a lot of time I feel like I'm having to do everything all on my own or make decisions on my own with such utter uncertainty.
How do I know who or what my Higher Power is?
I've always known who my higher power is. I just never really embraced it the way I should have or wanted to. It was always on my terms, when I needed Him, and only when I thought I needed Him.
Am I willing to try to turn my problems over? What could help me to be willing?
Yes, I feel ready to begin turning my problems over. I mean seriously, I have to try because the way I HAVE been doing it has not been working, in fact, it has only brought more troubles and sorrow into my life. I HAVE to. Because my life is unmanageable and I am powerless over it, but I have come to believe that my HP can and WILL restore my life.
How can I stop thinking, trying and considering, and actually make a decision?
Good question. I will work it into routine. practice practice practice. I will wake up and greet my HP, I will consult in Him in all things, I will work on having a personal relationship with God and then I do believe that I won't just consider turning it over anymore...it will just happen. Practice.
Have I had a problem making decisions in my life? Give examples.
Yes, for sure. Examples would be discipling my children. I will give a punishment and then go back it. Like I make decisions and then constantly second guess myself. Then I berate myself if the decision I made turns out to be the not so great choice.
If I am unable to make this decision, what holds me back?
Me, I hold myself back because I don't trust my own judgement. I always think that I am wrong
Do I trust my Higher Power to take care of me?
Um......yes? Not enough though, or I would have turned my life over a long time ago. But God has never let me down, when so many others have (including myself),so that should count for a whole hell of a lot.
How might Step Three help me keep my hands off situations created by others?
"let go and let God".It's a pretty simple philosophy really. It means that I am going to allow situations to "play out" and let God handle it instead of me getting my fingers all over the situation. Which is good too, because it keeps me out of trouble with that other person as well. Because If I have tried to take control, then when things go awry, it's me they blame. So it means, just mind my own damn business and let God take care of them. Also I like the idea of reminding myself that when I get involved on other people's paths I am taking away their God given right to make their own choices. That is powerful to me. That is not my place, and I could be screwing up whatever plans God has for that person.
What consequences have I had by obsessing on problems and other people?
Yikes, I've had quite a few. Meddling in the affairs of others has really gotten a lot of people pissed off at me. BIG TIME. As far as my AH goes, me obsessing about his problems has just led to more heartache on my end for having unmet expectations. In the midst of obsessing I also find myself gossiping quite a bit and that has caused a lot of chaos in my life and led to people mistrusting me for my big mouth.
When I “Let Go and Let God” take care of my life, am I willing to follow the guidance I receive?
I believe I am now. I wasn't before. I used to pray and if I didn't get the answer I wanted, I just kind of blew it off. Wow, that worked out really well for me, didn't it? I am ready to start. I am anxious to start in fact.
How can I turn a situation over and let go of the results?
Deep breaths. Meditate and pray for guidance. Pray for that person, that situation, and stick with my guns (do what's right for myself and my kids) and let the chips fall where they may. A buddist saying is "all is as it should be". I intend to work that into my life, even if the results aren't what I want. I know that God is in control. I am not. And when I TRIED to be in control, I got just further down the rabbit hole.
How can I stop myself from taking my will back?
I can remind myself of what happened when* I *was in control and remind myself that I made this commitment and really focus on the follow through.
What can I do when my loved ones make decisions I don’t like?
Again, deep breaths!! Let go and let God work in their lives. Clearly I was making decisions that weren't good for anyone when I was trying to control things...so just let God show them natural consequences. And remind myself that just because I don't LIKE it, doesn't mean it isn't the best choice for THEM. NOT MY CALL!
How can I let my loved ones find their own life paths as I am finding mine?
I can pray with them, I can pray for them, I can listen to them, love them, be understanding and yet stand by my boundaries. I can remind them that God loves them and that I love them. I can encourage them to seek their own path and give testimony of me trying to find mine. My therapist told me that in Buddhism they say your path is like a river, flowing right where it should be. And if you get distracted by something (or someone else's path) off shore...you are off YOUR path. So it can be bad for you and bad for them.
What can I do to try to see others as God sees them?
I can look at people the same way I am learning to look at myself...someone trying to find their path. Looking at them with love and kindness and compassion. BUT I still need to respect my own boundaries.I think God views us as precious and invaluable. I believe that God loves ALL of us....even our imperfections. So I need to respect the fact that others have imperfections and that they are on their OWN path to having God remove them. Or maybe they aren't. I don't know. I can only pray that they find what they are looking for in life.
How can I express God’s will in my actions and words towards others, including the alcoholic?
_____________With kindness, compassion, better listening skills, and love in my heart. Not just love for everyone else, but when I REALLY TRULY have love for myself...then I know I effectively love others with all that God intended.