ArtFriend

Last night I posted that I had had a few drinks. Some people felt like that was not the right thing to do, but others say it was helpful.

So, what am I supposed to do?

Thanks

Inchworm

More helpful to post before you drink, ArtFriend.

Tonks

It's a new day. What do you feel you should do AF?

Mikie9

I read your post as you being afraid of hiding the fact you drank, to be accountable. It would have been far worse IMO to have drank and kept it a "secret", because then it becomes an option. This didn't trigger me, but did remind me of how I used to drink, in secret.

Because we are reading words however, the post could have easily been read as, "neener neener I'm having a few drinks tonight, taking a break from recovery. I will be back at it tomorrow!"

You poured the rest out, so I am glad for that. If your post helped you come to that conclusion then I view it as a good thing.

Fly N Buy

Post what you want where you want. If something is inappropriate a mod will adjust or move as they see fit.

Don't focus on our friend SoberWolf - I am sure he meant no ill harm.
How are you today, and what is your plan to move forward?

Peace to all,
FlyN

desypete

why didnt you ring someone up or go to an aa meeting or post a message online or contact someone online before you picked the drink up ?

when you come to answer that question honestly then you might start to understand a bit more

there is help out there for anyone, but the bottom line is when we feel like a drink what do we do ? reach out for help or take a drink

the problem i have with many people is how they have no idea the dangers they might face the next day, why do they keep on thinking they can drink today and give up tomorrow ?

there will come a point if there alcholics were they will try to give up the next day and find they can not give up like they once did
they will end up drinking and drunk daily and life will fall to bits yet still they keep on thinking they can drink today and give up tomorrow

there are no tomorrows

take it from somoene who would love to be in many peoples shoes who still have so much to lose in life
if only i could of talked to myself and shown myself just were i would end up because i didnt take my problem serious at all

i thought i could give up whenever i wanted if things got so bad

until the time came where i found i couldn't do it

like i said if only i could have had someone to show me just what my future would look like for me if i carreid on drinking compared to how it would be if i didnt

well i had no one to show me as i went ahead and carreid on

but i can show others were they will end up if they believe me or not is up to them, if they believe there different that is nothing new as i did to

so all i can hope for my friend is you learn from picking up the drink again that what ever it is your doing so far isnt working for you so what about trying other things

but the bottom line is that it doesnt matter what you try if your not going to put in the effort that is needed when your tested then nothing will work

so next time time and post or contact someone before you pick a drink up and see if it helps or not

CAPTAINZING2000

In terms of how long you've been on the forum, I'd still consider you a new commer.

Fandy

Don't let other persons opinions intimidate what and where you post. Sometimes there is *drama* if someone posted that you brushed your teeth at 10am instead of 7am.
If it's not in the correct section, a moderator will move it.
I hope that today you have a good positive day and realize that it's a New Year...
You have the support you need from many people...that is why we are here.

ArtFriend

Thanks everyone. I usually post in the Newcomers section and the Women's section. Occasionally in the F&F section. Never have used the alcoholism section. What is that for?? How s that different?

Fly N Buy

Here's a sticky from Dee posted under newcomers Forum :

I've needed to say this for a while - had I posted here anytime in the years I was drinking, I would have made the same five posts over and over

•I'm so glad to be back. I know now that alcohol really sucks. I can't live that life anymore.

•I feel so much better. Sobriety is amazing. Man, I'm learning so much and feel so free, I'll never drink again.


•ok so, look guys - I had a couple of drinks on the weekend. It was ok - no big deal - I didn't even get drunk! but I know I shouldn't and I'll be careful - I really want to stay sober.

•I totally utterly lost the plot...fell over/got embarrassing/was arrested/lost my job or partner/crashed my car...etc etc

•I'm so glad to be back. I know now that alcohol really sucks. I can't live that life anymore....


All that happened to me, over and over and over and over...
except in my case I did not get arrested and I do not drive.

I finally realised the only way to stop the cycle is by not drinking - at all. Period.

If you don't add the fuel, you don't start your engine.
That makes sense to me.

Took me twenty years to get there and realise that tho. I was trying to control my drinking - not stop it.

I get it - this addiction is insidious...but please guys - do not follow in my footsteps.

D

Tonks

Personally I feel the need to share what I felt about your posts last night.

First it was irritation admittedly at the nonchalance of it... But once I thought about it, it wasn't irritation.

It was fear.

I could see how easy it could be to just say F**k it and have a few drinks, ill sort it out tomorrow. I could see how I'm still tempted deep down to convince myself that life is short why not have a drink, it's new years, i have more than one family member who has passed and others in the process it's ok to indulge to ease the bite of pain. Your posts so easily could have been My posts... And I was afraid.

Only you know what is best and supportive for yourself. As long as you are seeking support, we will be here.

And maybe along the way, we can learn to conquer our fears together.

Happy New Year ArtFriend.

ru12

You posted about drinking alcohol on a forum for people that drink/drank alcohol. The shock of it! Look some folk want to control what others can say or do, whatever. Did you learn anything from your drinking?

anattaboy

If it was really a big deal I'm sure it would have been flagged. Dee and Anna are on top of that stuff. I don't know about the rest I drank myself here. Your title said it all. I was concerned as most of us are but I will not deny anyone their right to hurt. I had a need to hurt before I could break the chains of alcohol myself. Anyhoo, glad yer back!

ArtFriend

Thanks for your feedback Tonks. I can see your point. We are all at different points in our journey with this thing. I stopped at 3 drinks. Someone else may have polished off the bottle, yet others would not have it in the house. I evidently triggered some people on here (not on purpose) and I feel badly about that. I also helped others, for which I am grateful. Being able to relate to the postings here is what makes them so powerful, in both good and bad ways. I know I have read some posts that made me cry because I identify with them so much. But I don't think it is the fault of the person who posted. I have to own my own feelings on that, like you just did!

fini

ArtFriend, you are a newcomer and you drank and wanted to say it.
no reason not to do so in the 'newcomer' section.
the non-chalant-appearing "tone" could be in the reader, or from the fact of you having had a few drinks and being in a place of several emotions about it.

personally, and this is an opinion, there is a huge difference between deliberately egging someone on to drink and posting about one's own drinking. though both might "trigger" someone else.
i do not believe that it is my responsibility or yours to keep others safe from whatever might trigger them.
one really great helpful thing to me in being on forums is to actually get "triggered" by some posts and have that opportunity to decide how to deal with it. to look at "why" that triggered me. to practice dealing with triggers.

if i couldn't learn how to handle "triggers" how would i make it into ongoing sobriety?

ArtFriend

Just that it was pointless and made me angry with myself.

readerbaby71

Start over and make a commitment to yourself not to drink.

Good luck and happy new year! xo

readerbaby71

double post

Soberpotamus

I read the thread and I see nothing wrong with what was posted or where it was posted. You aren't responsible for others' reactions to a triggering post, that's on them. I also noticed the ones trying to direct your posting are still fairly new themselves.

As long as you are posting within forum rules, you are A-Ok to post as you need in order to get feedback to help yourself.

I think you did a good thing by posting that you drank.

And I sincerely hope you jump right back into sobriety as well as figure out where the breakdown was in this incident.

Soberwolf

The reason i said what i said is the way you posted with i could tell you a liteny of reasons why but in the end it doesnt matter cheers & happy new year

im not telling you where to post i said if a 24h newbie or anybody craving etc saw that it is harmful in the way it was written

Whats the alcoholism section for ? i dont know if your joking at this point ?

Artfriend i dont think you done something wrong

Today is a new day focus on that if you do suffer cravings reach out as you know there is 24h support

The alcoholism section of this forum is discuss things related to alcoholism i believe and is worth checking out

im surprised you started a thread rather than asking the SR team if you done something wrong which i dont think was wrong and neither do they as the post is there

i stand by thinking about rehab or additional support to help you in your struggle with alcoholism