Catareta

It's amazing how much i read/hear About leaving your s/o when they have this disease.
I do struggle to see the future but he is still sober and prevented a possible relapse - was cooking and asked me for a small red wine serving but he no thanks as don't want to be tempted. So proud of him.

I understand he will struggle especially over the festivities (awaiting treatment programme) but I trust him mostly. Shame he has a chest infection to enjoy the feeling of sobriety ( I feel much better myself)

LexieCat

Why are you cooking with wine? Or drinking it in front of him? (The scenario isn't quite clear to me.)

Hawkeye13

Not so amazing really when you read about the years of hell so many of the people on this list have endured.

Glad things are going well with your spouse, and I agree that cooking with wine is not a good idea for someone early in recovery.

dandylion

Catareta....It is true....just like Hawkeye has just pointed out....A large majority of people who first come to this forum have put in years of struggling and suffering with their loved one....while the disease continued to ravage their relationship and damage their families. They have had to watch their loved be demolished before their very eyes with this disease.
For so many..this forum is like their last stop...sort of like an Emergency room or an ICU in the emotional sense. Sometimes, leaving is the only option left..as they have tried everything else to no avail.
Sometimes there are children involved who are being scarred for life by living in the toxicity of an alcoholic home. Some are suffering abuse..if not physically..at least, emotionally.

There comes a point in time when a person has got to do what they have got to do.
But, I must say that I have seen very few, on this forum take leaving as a first response....most, who do, seem to make an agonizing decision after long suffering and much contemplation.

And, I do hope that your spouse continues his sobriety and that things work out well for you two.

dandylion

carmen303

Glad to hear some positive news How long has he been sober?

shil2587

Lots of us are still with our partners and are here for advice, learnimg about ourselves and getting support when needed. But I also find it helpful to read about when.and why people leave to.help me decide what is acceptable to me and what is not.

Plan for the worst, expect the best.

Catareta

He is the chef and initially asked for wine to cook with. So for me its a proud moment that he took the alternative. Been sober just over 18 days.

lillamy

If it's surprising to you that people leave their alcoholic SO, I'm thinking you probably haven't experienced the worst of it. I hope you never have to.