Jackandbess2

Hey, it's my very first works Xmas party tonight without drinking alcohol. These "firsts" are so scary. I have been sober for nine months. I have no idea what it is like to go to a work Xmas party and probably be the only sober one, I am very anxious about it. Have any of you had to face this particular "first", any advice?

Thepatman

have an exit plan in place...

Lusher

Hey Jackandbess2-

First, congrats on the nine months!

In reference to your party; What I find that helps is to develop the mindset that having alcohol is simply not an option, period. What I mean is, rather than pondering on the fact that you can not drink, just know that's it's not even an option. Also, don't think about testing your strength with just 'one' drink or anything of that nature either.

Stay strong and enjoy your party!


Lusher

Frixion

Hmm well I am still at the beginning of my journey (day 11), but what I would suggest is to have a ride ready so at a moments notice if things get difficult you are able to just leave. Have a plan about what you will do when offered an alcoholic beverage. Maybe offer to be a DD - this might keep you accountable to sobriety both socially and responsibly.

Disclaimer: As I said before I am very new to all this, these are just things that came to mind that could possibly help, but maybe not

Jackandbess2

Thank you. I have already made myself the driver however it is miles away and my colleagues are all staying the night and are putting me under enormous presure to join them.

happyandfree

I did the same thing last weekend. I was nervous and scared about it. I had an escape plan and I drove to make sure I could leave immediately if I needed to. To my delight, the alcohol didn't bother me at all. There was so much wonderful food and the company was great. I focused on that and really enjoyed myself. They had a big bowl of non alcohol apple cider punch which was great. So it was a surprise for me and I KNOW that I had a better time since I wasn't drinking. And....there was nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed about the next day.

Tall Dawg

My work Christmas party was last night. Pretty much everyone drank but me. I had a lot of fun by making jokes about it. Every time the waitress came by, I would order things like "a virgin jack & coke", or a " virgin Cuba-libra, hold the line". Haha!!! You can do it!!!

happyandfree

And I have 10 months. ..pretty close to you.

Anna

I think I was about nine months sober when I first exposed myself to a party with alcohol involved. But, I knew it was safe in that no one would be pressuring me or questioning or noticing if I was drinking alcohol or not. In the situation you are describing, I wouldn't go.

Soberwolf

Well done on 9 months before you leave practice your lines of why your not drinking injust say i dont drink

have an exit plan if it gets uncomfortable and only go if you have no doubts

Good luck friend

SoberLeigh

Nine months of sobriety is a nice chunk of sobriety under your belt but the co-worker pressure compounded by your admitted anxiety sounds dangerous. Are you absolutely certain that you can successfully navigate this event?

GnikNus

Last weekend I went to an annual town Christmas party- one that I new would include FREE booze. I made up my mind ahead of time that I wouldn't drink, and I visualized myself attending and not drinking. As it turns out, I had a great time seeing local folks and hanging out with my 2 year old daughter. And drinking apple cider... It was strange, but I didn't miss it as much as I thought. I kept thinking about what a shame it would be to throw away the progress I'd made over a drink- like trading gold for cheap tin.

Jsbodhi

When I've been sober at parties I find it interesting to watch drinking people. Kinda makes me want to drink less.
Play the tape through of what would happen if you had a drink.

pattyj

I don't like the idea of your coworkers pressuring you. Do they know that you don't drink? It's up to you on whether you tell them or not and everyone has an opinion about that. But for me, I was able to be honest and my coworkers would never try to get me to do something that I didn't want to do, especially if it involved alcohol. Good luck! I like Anna's advice; don't go.

DontRemember

When I go out and don't drink,this is what I do. Kind of nice when you're not "That guy/girl'' for a change.

PurpleKnight

The biggest eye opener at social occasions I had, is that there are always other people not drinking, others driving, pregnant, don't drink or even just taking it easy for a night.

It's our mind that creates the fear of being the only one but it's just another myth!!

Great job on 9 months!!

Wharf Rat

I am in a very similar situation. Was invited to go to a basketball game by the chairman of the board of my company. Can't say no, and he will be drinking. I don't know what I am going to do but I'm freaking out and already thinking of my ways out.

Then I have a sales conference within my company and everyone will be asking why I'm not drinking. Also have to go to Chicago in early Jan for a work conference and dinner which will involve drinking, then to top it off a trip to Las Vegas for cocktail parties and dinners which is work related.

I can't get out of any of these. And I'm obsessing about staying sober much like I was obsessing about alcohol. Its all I can think about! It did feel better to write all of that out. Good luck to you

Ellay

I too have my xmas party tonight. I refuse to be the one that is slurring and making an arse out of herself so I am happily driving there and home. Will make a quick appearance, enjoy some food, thank my boss for a wonderful year of employment and head home. I have been saying that over and over to myself and imagining having a soda water while there.

sunshine1919

I have been to a few. It seems to get easier with each one.

blueyes618

I just posted about my first Xmas party without booze last week. It was definitely difficult at times, but once I was at ease with the people and the conversations started flowing I was able to keep my mind off of drinking. Focus on the food and people