Notices

relapsed after 8 months

Old 12-10-2014, 01:03 PM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
weirdesttoner's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 174
relapsed after 8 months

Well.. s**it!
I had 8 months. in 28 november i drank half a bottle of red wine. Don't ask me why, i was too nervous about intimate relations, because i never did it sober. I didn't enjoyed it, and i think i would have done better without it. I thought it was just a slip, because i didn't had the need to drink afterwards.
Anyway, yesterday, 10 days later, i wanted to drink a beer with a friend i haven't seen in a long time. The truth is, i wanted just to drink. Suddenly.
And i did, 6 of them. I called in sick at work today. Because i was sick. I convinced me that i don't like it and this will never happen again.
But here i am, several hours later, with 4 beers waiting next to me. I must be insane. I feel like all this sober time didn't even exist. I feel just like 8 months ago. All i want is to drink them.
I failed all of you those who helped me getting past bad times. I failed myself.
weirdesttoner is offline  
Old 12-10-2014, 01:08 PM
  # 2 (permalink)  
Administrator
 
Anna's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,330
I'm sorry you relapsed. It does sound familiar that people say you pick up right where you left off. This is a relentless disease. I'm glad you're back.
Anna is offline  
Old 12-10-2014, 01:09 PM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Member
 
SoberLeigh's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,775
Weirdesttoner, I am sorry that you are suffering.

Throw out those four cans of beer; dump them right away. Start over. You can do it; you have proven that already.
SoberLeigh is offline  
Old 12-10-2014, 01:10 PM
  # 4 (permalink)  
Member
 
Pondlady's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Midwest
Posts: 8,320
Can you pour the four beers down the drain....and get started again on your sobriety?
Pondlady is offline  
Old 12-10-2014, 01:11 PM
  # 5 (permalink)  
Member
 
BirdsAteMyFace's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2014
Posts: 107
That's how my binge started after 3 months sober and pretty soon I was drinking vodka in the middle of the night to stave off withdrawal. I almost lost my job because I called in/went home so much. It happens so fast.

Don't give up. You didn't fail anyone. It's the nature of this hideous disease. It lies.
BirdsAteMyFace is offline  
Old 12-10-2014, 01:20 PM
  # 6 (permalink)  
Forum Leader
 
ScottFromWI's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Welcome back friend. Dump/toss those beers immediately, you don't want this turning back into a major skid...nip it in the bud now.
ScottFromWI is offline  
Old 12-10-2014, 01:20 PM
  # 7 (permalink)  
Member
 
Jsbodhi's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,837
Its frightening how it happens so fast, the best thing you can so is get back on the sober track before it gets out of control. Xoxo
Jsbodhi is offline  
Old 12-10-2014, 01:20 PM
  # 8 (permalink)  
quat
 
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: terra (mostly)firma
Posts: 4,819
My vote is to pour them out, whats the worst that could happen from that?

There is no best that can happen with the alternative.
dwtbd is offline  
Old 12-10-2014, 05:17 PM
  # 9 (permalink)  
Member
 
VikingGF's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: New England
Posts: 4,388
Pour that beer out right now and then go read every thread you ever started and every comment in those threads until you get to this one. Use all the things you have learned in 8 months to save your life right now before this turns into a month, 6 months, a year, 2 years before you try and stop again. I have no doubt you have been around this site long enough to know how this goes- it does not end well. Unless you stop right now. Not tomorrow, not next Tuesday. Stopping gets harder, not easier, and just think of what you already went through when you stopped 8 months ago. The fog! The fatigue! The self-loathing. Please don't go back. It's in no way too late right now. Just pick yourself up and stop today.

Do it for yourself.
VikingGF is offline  
Old 12-10-2014, 05:57 PM
  # 10 (permalink)  
...holds the key
 
brynn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 7,065
I've been right where you are, my friend...feeling miserable and like the biggest failure ever! I hope you make the decision to pour out the beer and to re-commit yourself to sobriety. You can do this...you've done it before. Make this relapse be the last and end it now! I want to see you succeed. You have an entire community standing behind you.
brynn is offline  
Old 12-10-2014, 06:07 PM
  # 11 (permalink)  
Member
 
biminiblue's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Please don't let this take you down again.

We need you, you need us. Start again. No one is disappointed in you, you're one of us.
biminiblue is offline  
Old 12-10-2014, 06:23 PM
  # 12 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2014
Posts: 41
This is all part of the process my friend, just start again, one day at a time. I can't remember how many times I have started again but here I am. I refuse to let a set-back, minor indiscretion shall we call it, take me back into the world full time. I got out, you got out, we simply slipped back into familiar habits for a while but that's done now. Back on track for you!

Listen, this is simply not going to be easy for any of us but believe me, 8 months sober and falling off the wagon temporarily is better then 8 months drunk! You are still a success, we all have bad hair days - just chalk it down to that!
Hopeful2013 is offline  
Old 12-10-2014, 06:27 PM
  # 13 (permalink)  
Community Greeter
 
Hevyn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,416
Hi Weird. I'm glad you wanted to tell what happened and get some support. You learned something valuable - you can get back to where you were, armed with more strength and determination.
Hevyn is offline  
Old 12-10-2014, 06:49 PM
  # 14 (permalink)  
Administrator
 
Dee74's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,048
You sober time does exist tho

All you learned and accomplished in those 8 months is still there, WS.

The only way you can lose that is if you wilfully throw it away.

Dump the rest of the beers and get back to where you want to be...

then you can think about different ways to deal with th siutations that led you to drinking again,

D
Dee74 is offline  
Old 12-10-2014, 06:51 PM
  # 15 (permalink)  
Member
 
Notimetoloose's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: OZ
Posts: 2,055
There would be very few people on this site that nailed sobriety the first time....

The key to long term sobriety is never taking that first drink ever...sounds easy....
I mean it sounds so easy and it is for a non alcoholic ....for us ...not so.

I don't believe that you lost those 8 months...it is a better way to live, you have the comparison...you know the despair that comes from drinking. Pour what you have out and join us...dig your heels in and tell your AV where to go...Let it know that you are back and you are running your life.
Notimetoloose is offline  
Old 12-10-2014, 11:20 PM
  # 16 (permalink)  
Guest
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 4,580
Originally Posted by weirdesttoner View Post
Anyway, yesterday, 10 days later, i wanted to drink a beer with a friend i haven't seen in a long time. The truth is, i wanted just to drink.
I drank after 6 months recently WS....

You say you didn't like it...yet you drank again.
You can CHOOSE sobriety again WS...
Don't let your addiction turn this into a shame storm that justifies continuing to drink...

You've been SOBER for OVER 8 MONTHS...
it's NOT ALL GONE. Don't let that addiction feed you that BS.

Choose to throw out the booze and AV nonsense bout losing anything..

RETURN TO SOBRIETY....

Just like that.
Just DO IT....

Or do you WANT to keep drinking?
Nuudawn is offline  
Old 12-10-2014, 11:39 PM
  # 17 (permalink)  
Member
 
439trish's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 291
thank you for posting what happened, you know that took courage. I believe you can get back to sober living where you left off, your 8 months is real. to say that it isn't is not rational. I am struggling myself to get some traction in sobriety, but I don't discount one single day of it.

you said you proved to yourself that you don't even like it, I think we all end up there as this disease progresses

I am pulling for you, and for me, and for all of us.

439trish is offline  
Old 12-11-2014, 02:42 AM
  # 18 (permalink)  
Member
 
soberclover's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Georgia
Posts: 3,062
How are you doing weird?
soberclover is offline  
Old 12-11-2014, 03:44 AM
  # 19 (permalink)  
The Long and Winding Road....
 
Vandermast's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Brisbane QLD
Posts: 897
hey there

I relapsed many many times.....had a few lengthy sober periods too.......

one thing I have truly learned though, is that any hope for me whatsoever ends when I have the first one.....

simple but a hard line to walk at times

pick yourself up and dust yourself off......

I did.....9 days sober......

we cannot fight it in isolation, rather reprieve comes through the strength of many

v
Vandermast is offline  
Old 12-11-2014, 04:00 AM
  # 20 (permalink)  
Member
 
Jupiters's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 2,449
hey weird, hope you're feeling better today.

Like Nuu - I recently relapsed after a 6.5 month sober period. Went to Cuba and ended up having some wine as well. Luckily, I caught on fast that I was NOT enjoying the feelings it brought back and quickly stopped, able to enjoy my vacay sober as planned.
You had 8 months, they DID happen. It wasn't a figment of your imagination. You can start again, we all can. Don't let this turn into something more. You can do this.
Jupiters is offline  

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 11:26 PM.