I failed
I failed
Setting her with tears rolling down my face. I drank the over the last two days. I started on Thanksgiving. I saw everyone with wine and I didn't even think I just gave in. Then we went to a concert yesterday and I drank. I feel awful and wish I had never gave in. Really sucks. I'm ready to start again. 89 days and now back to day 1. Sorry guys.
Alynn;
No worries it happened it over you cant change it. Today you can control so what will you do I ask? Will you drink again today? Will you take control of today and not drink? The choice is yours......I am confident of what you will choose.
Greg
No worries it happened it over you cant change it. Today you can control so what will you do I ask? Will you drink again today? Will you take control of today and not drink? The choice is yours......I am confident of what you will choose.
Greg
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 1,126
I hear you. I'm an alcoholic and realizing that I would drink again despite all of the consequences, despite all of my own efforts, was the good bottom after my bad bottom.
I didn't have a choice in the matter. After 40 years of drinking and smoking pot and living on benzos, I knew that despite my best efforts, I would drink and use again.
That realization brought me to finally surrender, and in some inexplicable way, I found some freedom in it. It's way to paradoxical for me to explain, but just giving up the fight somehow allowed me to tap into a power that could do what I couldn't.
I didn't have a choice in the matter. After 40 years of drinking and smoking pot and living on benzos, I knew that despite my best efforts, I would drink and use again.
That realization brought me to finally surrender, and in some inexplicable way, I found some freedom in it. It's way to paradoxical for me to explain, but just giving up the fight somehow allowed me to tap into a power that could do what I couldn't.
Hey Alynn- Sorry to hear about your slip. There's no reason that you can't continue though. Just be mindful of what happened this last time, and perhaps try to avoid whatever it was that put you in that position.
Lusher
Lusher
89 is fantastic!!! Be proud of that, shrug this off and keep going, self loathing isn't going to solve anything <3
You didn't fail, you had a relapse. It happens. You drank and you shouldn't have, and should take steps not to in the future, but don't throw away all those days sober over a weak moment. Learn from it and look forward. This is why I don't get too hung up counting days. 89 says sober is great and a few weak moments doesn't undo that.
Pick yourself up Alynn and try again. 89 days is NOTHING to frown about! That's great and shows you got what it takes.
Every time I relapsed before I DIDNT THINK before picking up....just like you said above. I have learned I own the AV and with some determination AND will power you can shut him down. Also, it feels SOOO good when ya make it over the hump sober.
Jump back on today!!! YOU GOT THIS!
Every time I relapsed before I DIDNT THINK before picking up....just like you said above. I have learned I own the AV and with some determination AND will power you can shut him down. Also, it feels SOOO good when ya make it over the hump sober.
Jump back on today!!! YOU GOT THIS!
You know, you did have those 89 days. So yeah, "officially" you're back on day one, but not on square one. You have the experience of 89 days now.
Maybe sobriety is progressive, just like alcoholism is a progressive disease. The more you do it, the more you gain the ability to stay sober.
So it's back to being sober. Just like you were. This is just a small setback.
Maybe sobriety is progressive, just like alcoholism is a progressive disease. The more you do it, the more you gain the ability to stay sober.
So it's back to being sober. Just like you were. This is just a small setback.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Wellington, NZ
Posts: 250
I was just thinking- yep :=] Whether you have or haven't failed, you're now living a sober life interrupted by a short period of using. Surely that's leaps and bounds ahead of what it was before? (I'm assuming it was the opposite.)
Member
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 1,287
[QUOTE=twentyfive;5046777]You know, you did have those 89 days. So yeah, "officially" you're back on day one, but not on square one. You have the experience of 89 days now.
I like what twenty-five says here! You have 89 days of sobriety, and that is a major accomplishment. You can do it!
I like what twenty-five says here! You have 89 days of sobriety, and that is a major accomplishment. You can do it!
I'm over three years sober- previously I have "failed" at 6 weeks and six months- have another go don't judge thinks- focus on results and what you need to do to get them
In truth my drinking after six months was a planned relapse- "just one night" LOL
In truth my drinking after six months was a planned relapse- "just one night" LOL
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