mistory5

I'm on day 9 clean and am still in the process of developing a plan. First and foremost in the plan is: don't pick up a drink no matter what. 2nd is prayer, 3rd coming to sr , 4th actually sharing in group therapy, mindfulness, CBT. AA has not worked for me in the past. Well I been really trying to identify triggers to list so they won't sneak up on me and low and behold I remembered times where I might of had 2 to 3 weeks clean I get bored and go on facebook. After about a week of being on FB I'm upset because my life looks like crap compared to others and I will start drinking( not conciously over fb) just wondering if fb is a true trigger or is the drink just going to call me no matter if I look at fb 2 weeks clean or not. Does anyone else find fb is a trigger for them? I'm seriously thinking of closing the fb account.

Dee74

A lot of people give up Facebook. It all seems a bit silly when you're fighting for your life.

As far as comparing yourself to others - 95% of what you read on facebook is BS. I would not waste another second comparing yourself to others.

Lastly, if you feel your life really is 'crap' you have the power to fix that mistory

D

gippy1968

FB is a bottomless pit of wasted time - I think. Email, text and phone calls to keep in touch with those I care to.

Jsbodhi

I haven't had fb book for over 2 years and I don't miss it in the least, people only post what they want the world to see.

Jsbodhi

I'd just let it go for a while if I were you

Lusher

This has been discussed by some professionals in the past. I understand that people tend to compare their life to that of others they know, using Facebook as a reference. Often the lives that people depict as their own, are often not accurate. In-other-words, people will make it seem as if their lives are much better than they really are.

I, personally, do not use Facebook, but I do hear a lot of frustration from other people due to the gossip, negative postings, etc... Knowing that it can cause triggers for you, it does seem as if staying off of it, at least for a while, might be something to consider.


Lusher

Shellshocked444

mistory5 I agree with all of the replies you have received. One of my very close friends has never been on FB and I have told her to never join (even though I am a member). She knew of someone who fell into such a deep depression on FB, that she came close to suicide. It's not a healthy environment. People only post all the "great things" which probably make up 5% of their lives. Fake reality.

SoberComposer

I also quit facebook awhile back. It's being used in a self-centered and selfish way my many.

I remember seeing people at nice restaurants ordering food and then taking photos and posting it before ever touching their expensive meal. LOL, I bet the satisfaction of that post released more serotonin then the food.

Sadness covered in facades

ScottFromWI

Agree with all of the above. While FB does have legitimate uses, the bulk of what is listed is merely vanity and mostly a waste of your time. I deleted my account several years ago and don't miss it even a little bit.

Lostinhk

Yes!!! I would say for a lot of people it certainly is. Facebook can trigger my anxiety which makes me want to drink or smoke.

When you see post after post of people ranting their opinions or childishly seeking attention (e.g. the "what a crappy day" status posts) or posting pictures of starving/dying/abused children/animals then it can be easy to see why many of us avoid Facebook when our anxiety or AV is bad.

I find when I'm having a good day (no av, little to no anxiety) then I can go on Facebook and play around for a while, but on the bad days I definitely avoid it.

Shellshocked444

mistory5, great on ya for 9 days clean! I am 2 days here then 1 day here. I really like the non-judgement of this site and support. Best of luck.

EndGameNYC

Facebook is still around?

newlifecy

I too quite facebook when I got sober. A lot of it has to do with anonymity for me. I also believe it's a complete waste of time.

Serenidad

Totally agree with the "fake reality" comment here! Some people on FB are so insecure that they have to post daily "selfies" and edit their photos before posting them. And why do they always take selfies in their car??? Weird! I have NEVER taken a selfie. Lmao. There are a few people who post every single thing they do all day long and constantly brag. Then here are those who post photos of themselves out partying all the time looking like they are having a great time with all their friends and alcohol. The sad thing is....I've learned that many of those people are also alcoholics. A few of them have died. :-( They never post those photos.

To be honest..I DO get on FB once in a while but mostly for a few cool sites like Viral Nova and a few other news sites. Viral Nova has some awesome stories about really interesting things going on all over the world! I also like to laugh at some of the things people post! Bahahaha! I literally say to myself "are you serious????? Hahahah". If it triggers you maybe just stay off of it for a while. You can also block posts from specific people and just keep the non-annoying ones. Just do what's best for you.

I personally like to get on it once in a while for pure humor and entertainment value. ;-) Some people just make total fools of themselves! Lol. I also stay in touch with about 50 family members from all over the world thru FB.

Just keep up the great work on your sobriety. It doesn't need to be all or nothing. You can keep the account and just block certain peeps. OR you can just get rid of it. :-)

EndGameNYC

I just shared your comments with over 2,000 of my closest friends.

Lance40

I'm not big into social media, but I think the FB experience you have is really up to you. My partner and I live thousands of kilometres from our families, and it has been a way to share pictures and stay in touch. I'm also part of a book club that uses a FB page to share about the books we are reading in-between our face to face discussions. I've been on FB for years but have been quite judicious which means I have just a small group of friends, and if any of them start to get political, negative or anything else I don't enjoy I just unsubscribe which keeps them as friends but doesn't show any of their posts on my feed. Lately though I must say there seem to be a lot of ads that show up everywhere, so to just spend time there without a real purpose can be like watching mindless daytime TV.

TopEndChick

I have had a facebook account for years , and used to post a lot of various things on there. I went through one period of deep depression being one of those idiots who (drunk) put it all out there as my status updates... I shudder with humiliation at the memory. I have long since gone through the whole thing and deleted anything like that. It's so invasive. I still keep the account open for private chat with a select few people with whom it is the easiest way for me to catch up with. I haven't posted anything for about a year and a half and have strict privacy settings, but do like to go on there to find out about local music events etc in my area, and messaging as I said. I do have lots of cool photos with friends, and hundreds of holiday photos on there of my travels through Indonesia, Malaysia and Europe. I quite like those, as it's all the best ones of course and sorted into albums. Sometimes I just go to facebook to look at them. I have thought about deactivating my account, but am happy to use it without posting anything publicly. I also sometimes play a silly, mind calming game on there called 'Fantasy Garden'

I see this website has been updated... new homepage and smilies. And why not?

Elodie

I got rid of my FB and I do not miss it. All of my real friends, I can contact through other methods. If the only way I can get in touch with someone is through Facebook, then we aren't really friends.

Try to make a conscious effort to not compare your life to what you see of others. You know all your own intimate details, all your innermost thoughts. You don't know that about your FB friends. They could be miserable, unhappy, feeling inadequate themselves, and posting something totally different. Speaking from my own experience, if you were to look at my FB during the darkest times of my life, you'd never know.

Remember, you're comparing your behind-the-scenes footage to other people's highlights reel. Apples and oranges. If Facebook is triggering you or you feel worse after going on, just deactivate or delete your account.

ThatHombre

I deleted my FB and Twitter accounts recently. I am dialing back my online presence.

StellaPolaris

Facebook is my main channel for local events and happenings, also keeps me in contact with family. I almost started this thread myself a few days ago - FB is a HUGE trigger for me. Mostly due to the Ex and the stalking I sometimes find myself doing... The "shiny, happy people"..? Thankfully I know what's going on with them in real life. Most of them need the positive attention on FB to be able to cope with their real issues...

Thanks a lot for the post, though, very happy to know it's not just me.

...oh, and all the pictures of beers and glasses of wine come Friday..? I try to avoid those...