jryan19982

I did so good for so long- I even stopped counting the days. Same end result this time I just logged more sober time. It started with a drink a few times a week, then lead to drinking every day again. Darnit. I am pretty pissed at myself. Upset that I failed again. Anxiety and stress is high at the moment, probably because yesterday i drank too much. I was doing so well. And I was so happy for myself. Stupid move, darnit.

Anna

I'm sorry that you are feeling down. But, you know that you can do this. Try to figure out what happened that led to you drinking and then see how you can avoid that in the future.

FreeOwl

you racked up some more sober time... you also learned some more about being suckered back into it....

take those learnings and renew your commitment.

ScottFromWI

What were you doing as a sobriety plan prior to returning to drinking? The good news is you are back...the question is what will you do differently this time?

Nonsensical

I was never cured either. It always leads to the same place. Always. I had to accept it will never be different.

Glad you're back. The anxiety will pass.

HenryKrinkle

Your Addictive Voice (AV) got the better of you. It tricked you into thinking that having a few drinks would be OK. But you know it's not OK. Work on identifying when your AV is speaking. When you recognize that voice, override what it is saying, and remind yourself that you no longer drink.

jryan19982

My plan included avoiding my triggers, talking to someone, voicing what I was feeling when I faced a trigger, working out to take away stress and anxiety and depression.

I think that I became complacent and stopped practicing some of the things that I put into place.

doggonecarl

Actually not that long. That's not a snub, but a fact. Six weeks (by your last count) is EARLY in recovery. So be vigilant about feeling too good about your sobriety. Our addiction uses that against us.

Soberwolf

Glad your back jryan good advice above

SoberCAH

You are certainly doing some helpful things from a recovery standpoint.

But it sounds like you probably need to integrate some other actions into your recovery regimen.

I suggest that you research and select a program of recovery and that you pursue it with all of the energy and diligence you can muster.

Best, amigo.

Mark1014

Jryan, I know you're disappointed with yourself and certainly it would have been best if you hadn't had those drinks. Having said that, I believe that you can make it a victory by applying what you learned to your current effort. Youre back in the game now, so chin up, chest out and carry on!

Dee74

Hi jryan

so you learned not to underestimate this thing - that's a good lesson.

Maybe some more support and a few changes in your lifestyle and how you deal with stuff can help make this time permanent?

D

AdmimalBlueEyes

I've noticed every time I get complacent I'm right back to drinking , I'm going to do what others say works and stay vigilant and put the work in ,

Chillly

At least you're back!

jryan19982

Yup underestimated my AV and overestimated myself...

jryan19982

Ok so I am done feeling sorry for myself. And this is my plan:

1. Will continue to avoid my triggers
2. Will continue talking to somebody about whatever really, just helps to have someone listen objectively.
3. Will keep exercising and getting outside. When i started to slip on this, my AV got louder and louder.
4. Will lift weights to help with stress.
5. Will get back to working on the motorcycles to help with stress.
6. Finally, will get to meetings. Before I kept saying that I didnt need to go and could do this myself. Well guess what, I couldnt.

Here is what I liked about being sober for however long it was.

1. I felt better, and felt better about myself.
2. I interacted with family more, and wasnt just there.
3. I didnt get irritated as much.
4. Mentally I felt better.
5. I had a better outlook on things that were going on.
6. It was just better, everything to anything, it was just better.

Hevyn

Sounds great jryan. I had to have a few failures before I finally admitted I could never touch the stuff again. Being a social drinker was not possible for me. Glad you are back to give it another go - this time will be different.

jryan19982

Man I hope so... thanks for your support.

jryan19982

Man I hope so... thanks for your support.