Feel like I just survived a huge test of character.
Sober Soldier
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Join Date: Nov 2014
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Feel like I just survived a huge test of character.
Some of you may find this almost insane, but I work at a sports bar on Saturday nights bar-backing for extra cash. Oddly enough, it doesn't usually affect my urges either way. If anything it reduces them because I'm constantly reminded of the horrible effect alcohol can have on people. I myself don't hang around bars. I just go in, do my job, keep my head down, take my money and go home.
Anyway, it happened to be my second day of sobriety after a successful day one. It also happened to be one of the more stressful nights. And as part of my commitment to stay sober, I am also working on dealing with stress better. But man was I craving a drink by the end of my shift! I even sat and stared at a beer for several minutes, almost as if it was taunting me, daring me to give in.
I am happy to say that I am home now, and have successfully resisted the urge to drink in spite of my nerves being shot. Day two is in the books. I feel like every part of me was challenged tonight. My willpower, my confidence (I was honestly worried for a while that I was gonna give in), but I remained steadfast.
But now it's 3 AM and I'm ready for some real sleep.
Hope everyone is having a great weekend!
Anyway, it happened to be my second day of sobriety after a successful day one. It also happened to be one of the more stressful nights. And as part of my commitment to stay sober, I am also working on dealing with stress better. But man was I craving a drink by the end of my shift! I even sat and stared at a beer for several minutes, almost as if it was taunting me, daring me to give in.
I am happy to say that I am home now, and have successfully resisted the urge to drink in spite of my nerves being shot. Day two is in the books. I feel like every part of me was challenged tonight. My willpower, my confidence (I was honestly worried for a while that I was gonna give in), but I remained steadfast.
But now it's 3 AM and I'm ready for some real sleep.
Hope everyone is having a great weekend!
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I should probably note that several times throughout my shift when I had a few minutes, I would come on here for inspiration. Probably wouldn't have made it if it weren't for this awesome website!
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Thank you everyone!
Soberwolf, I do have a regular 9-5 job that I work several days a week, I just work at the bar one night a week because it's good money and the extra cash is nice. I am also trying to start my own business (the stress of which I believe helped drive me to start drinking again a couple weeks ago). I have worked for this bar/restaurant since high school and have developed strong friendships with many of the people who work there. And everyone there knows I don't usually drink (although I never tell them when I have a relapse) and no one tries to pressure me. They are actually pretty impressed that someone who works at a bar doesn't drink! And I usually never get urges while I'm there. I think maybe since it was day two and I had put a lot of pressure on myself to stay the course kind of made it challenging for me.
But I woke up today extremely proud of myself for having the mental fortitude to tough it out. And I am extremely grateful for all of you as well.
Soberwolf, I do have a regular 9-5 job that I work several days a week, I just work at the bar one night a week because it's good money and the extra cash is nice. I am also trying to start my own business (the stress of which I believe helped drive me to start drinking again a couple weeks ago). I have worked for this bar/restaurant since high school and have developed strong friendships with many of the people who work there. And everyone there knows I don't usually drink (although I never tell them when I have a relapse) and no one tries to pressure me. They are actually pretty impressed that someone who works at a bar doesn't drink! And I usually never get urges while I'm there. I think maybe since it was day two and I had put a lot of pressure on myself to stay the course kind of made it challenging for me.
But I woke up today extremely proud of myself for having the mental fortitude to tough it out. And I am extremely grateful for all of you as well.
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Join Date: Jun 2014
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That's a good plan. Hard minute, SR dose! I'm proud of you for making it. That is a hard environment to remain sober at. I think being sober can make you better at bartending and that will increase you tips. But IT IS hard to remain sober there. Come on over anytime you need us. Someone is always here!
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Hi Mns1,
Here's my 2 cents. I'm sure I'm overvaluing it.
I managed a bar my first year sober. I too found it to reinforce why I didn't ever want to drink again. As if my own up close and personal experience wasn't horrible enough, I found seeing how it caused terrible suffering to others was pretty powerful motivation for me to just be grateful I didn't live like that anymore.
But here's what I learned. No matter what opportunity life through at me where I drank before but this time I answered no and didn't. I got stronger. And life threw those lessons at me everyday and even several times a day at first.
Now I would never recommend to anyone to go work around liquor if you have a problem with liquor. I have no idea what other people can or can't handle or how they see things.
I do know this. For me, it had nothing to do with my surroundings but had everything to do with me being able to do what I said I was going to do. I had to practice that one a lot in pretty much every area of my life. When I got good at that, it didn't matter what the world around me was doing. I knew what I was doing.
Keep your eyes open for life's next opportunity but don't press your luck if handling stress is one of those things that gets you going on picking up a drink again. Heaven knows food and alcohol service is nothing but stress.
Here's my 2 cents. I'm sure I'm overvaluing it.
I managed a bar my first year sober. I too found it to reinforce why I didn't ever want to drink again. As if my own up close and personal experience wasn't horrible enough, I found seeing how it caused terrible suffering to others was pretty powerful motivation for me to just be grateful I didn't live like that anymore.
But here's what I learned. No matter what opportunity life through at me where I drank before but this time I answered no and didn't. I got stronger. And life threw those lessons at me everyday and even several times a day at first.
Now I would never recommend to anyone to go work around liquor if you have a problem with liquor. I have no idea what other people can or can't handle or how they see things.
I do know this. For me, it had nothing to do with my surroundings but had everything to do with me being able to do what I said I was going to do. I had to practice that one a lot in pretty much every area of my life. When I got good at that, it didn't matter what the world around me was doing. I knew what I was doing.
Keep your eyes open for life's next opportunity but don't press your luck if handling stress is one of those things that gets you going on picking up a drink again. Heaven knows food and alcohol service is nothing but stress.
Sober Soldier
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Join Date: Nov 2014
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I agree 360 shoes. I think it would be impossible to avoid everything that in the past has been a trigger for drinking, and therefore we have to learn to deal with those particular triggers when confronted with them. And if I am able to say no to alcohol in a situation where before I would give in, I agree that I am all the stronger for it.
As for all the other stressors in my life, I feel I have renewed motivation to pursue my career goals with full focus and move beyond having to work at a bar for extra money. Once I'm doing what I love, I don't think I'll have any reason for alcohol anymore, because the void I've been using it to fill will be filled by something much more rewarding.
As for all the other stressors in my life, I feel I have renewed motivation to pursue my career goals with full focus and move beyond having to work at a bar for extra money. Once I'm doing what I love, I don't think I'll have any reason for alcohol anymore, because the void I've been using it to fill will be filled by something much more rewarding.
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