ANewDayNYC

I was having a good week getting back on track with things, but I stumbled yesterday and drank. I was hungover so I had to call in sick. Just feel worthless and down on myself. Feel I let myself down.

Mrrryah1

<3 It's tough, NYC, I get it.

On the bright side - today is a brand new day - with no mistakes in it!

Hope you make this a fresh start and get right back on the wagon

ANewDayNYC

Thanks Mrryah – I have no desire to drink this weekend. Will get myself back on track.

Anna

I think there are two points. It's really important to figure out why you decided to drink, so that it won't happen again. And, then you need to forgive yourself and move on. Relentless guilt and shame will lead you back to drinking.

I'm really glad that you came back and posted.

ANewDayNYC

I went to an event with my friends that was at a bar. My friends don’t care at all if I drink or not. I am just incapable (the majority of the time) of being in a bar without drinking – especially a type of bar like that that has a DJ, etc.

I am fortunate in the sense that I have no temptation to drink in my apartment. If I can avoid bars, I am fine. It is just very difficult for me to do. I know I posted this a million times, but I had enough. I really want to stop. I feel I am at the crossroads and I see both paths – when I don’t drink everything in my life goes well and when I drink it ruins everything. My commitment right now is 100%. However, it is hard for me to maintain this anger (in a good way)/desire/fight in me once next week rolls around. I can’t keep doing this anymore. I need to stop drinking.

Nowsthetime

Like your name, it IS a new day. You know that if you can't say no to a drink at a bar , and you don't want to drink then don't go to bars. At least for a long while. It's up to you!!! You can't just want it. This is part of the work that needs to be done to achieve sobriety. We can do this!

MyTime86

I had to fail a couple times to get to my mind set now.
I got to the point where I was so tired of being depressed. If bars trigger you to drink don't go in them no more excuses you know better now.
I believe you can do it, let's be happy no more self harm

ANewDayNYC

Thanks nowsthetime and mytime86. I am going to go to AA tonight - I think I need to do something to prove to myself that I am committed.

luvmygirls

That's funny, I'm the exact opposite! I always drank at home and very rarely overdid it when I was out. In any case, I'm glad you posted in the November thread so we can all continue to support each other. You can do this!

ANewDayNYC

Thanks josharon - I am glad to be a part of the November class and I appreciate the support.

ArtFriend

It's a Catch-22. You drink because your depressed and then you become more depressed so you drink more and get more depressed. Crazy making!

CAPTAINZING2000

I strongly advise anyone to stay away from bars early in sobriety. What's the point in going to them with the temptations so great?
Some events like these in the future you're going to have to decline.

ANewDayNYC

I agree with you – I am just going to have to decline all invites. The toughest will be Thanksgiving since it’s a popular time people drink in my hometown. However, this is getting serious and I need to put my sobriety first. New Years will also be really hard but that a little bit away from now.

sunrise88

I stumbled and was drunk for a year today is day three for me. We are all fighting the same demons. I have the opposite problem; I like to drink at home, until I pass out.

Please don't let the guilt get you; although I've been struggling with the exact same thing lately. I feel guilty constantly. But we can move on from today and make the future bright and full of success and milestones. Please don't give up; msg me anytime if you wanna talk.

bm2bob

I wonder if going to bars early inrecovery is a good idea. It's actually easy to avoid bars. You don't walk through the door. If you have to find friends that support your recovery efforts you might want to do that. A friend who is indifferent to your recovery efforts, is effectively directly opposed.

The idea that avoiding bars is in some way a long-term sobriety plan may be false as well. I can avoid bars, and get bit by the grocery store, or the 7-11. Eventually, I need to find a manner of living which is less about avoiding things and more about changing myself.

But you're new. This too shall pass. I'm glad you're back.

ANewDayNYC

Thanks for the posts everyone - I am feeling better than earlier. Grateful for this website.

iceteaplease

I'm sorry about your slip, NewDay. I swear, it is extra darn hard to stay sober here in NYC. But if we can make it here, we can make it anywhere....stay strong!!!!

JT0626

This is so me too! I don't drink when I am out because I am usually the designated driver, at home - all bets are off.

ANewDayNYC,

Don't beat yourself up. You may just have to avoid bars for a while. I have relapsed many of times, I felt worse the next day & drank again. It was a vicious cycle. Stay the course, you are so worth it. (((hugs)))

ANewDayNYC

Thanks icetea - I know, it feels like there are bars on every block. If I don’t go out, I can hear the music from the bars across the street from my apartment and I imagine everyone having fun and I’m sitting alone in my room (especially on the weekends).

Agree with you JT – I need to do whatever it takes to avoid bars. I appreciate the positive words.

Dee74

I had to change my life ANDNY. I tried living my old life sober and it was impossible cos my old life was all about drinking.

so I made the decision - no more hanging in bars, no more being around alcohol - at least until I felt strong enough to do that and not want to drink.

D