carmen303

I'm just trying to understand the symptoms of alcoholic insanity. This is what I experienced :

- anger/verge of blowing up at strangers
- controlling
- crudeness; it didn't seem to match the sweet side of his personality.
- inappropriate behaviors
- grudges
-jeckll/hyde

I'm not talking about the person being drunk; just the symptoms of having the alcoholic brain (from drinking so frequently - his alcohol of choice was wine)

Is most of this typical of the alcoholism? Have any of you noticed crudeness/crude behaviors associated with it?

Dojang

I have several to add:
Lying
Manipulating
Committing crimes (Driving drunk, stealing, etc)
Mental abuse
Physical abuse
Getting fired
Peeing the bed
Black outs
Numerous health problems
Legal problems
Blaming

ladyscribbler

All of the above. With progression the anger escalated to verbal and physical abuse. Not all alcoholics do any or all of those things, just like not all alcoholics cheat or do any other particular behavior.
I wasted a lot of time analyzing my ex's behavior. I didn't start getting better until I turned that focus on myself and my behavior. Have you tried Alanon? I've been going for a year and it has helped me more than all the time I spent worrying about my alcoholic ex.

carmen303

What about crudeness? Does it cause this?

ladyscribbler

I don't think any of this is necessarily CAUSED by alcoholism, other than the lowering of inhibitions anyone would experience when drunk. My ex used to say crude disgusting things when drinking. That doesn't mean we should give people a pass for inappropriate behavior just because they were drinking. I think I used to give the booze too much credit because I was so desperate to believe that the good guy was the "real him", but that simply isn't true. He was everything he showed to me, the good the bad and the ugly.

Santa

This describes my XAH. You might want to consider a dual diagnosis. By that I mean the alcohol is self medicating for something else. Twenty-five years after I met him, my ex was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Now the Jekyll-Hyde mood changes, the grudges, etc make sense. Doesn't excuse any of it of course.

torquemax777

What's crazy about my AH it's when he's sober, he's like Ward Cleaver; hates dirty jokes, no talking about sex EVER, never cusses, is extremely discrete about bodily functions like passing gas. When he's drunk, he turns into a slurring, red neck slob that cusses like a sailor, jokes continuous filthy jokes and sarcasm. Yeah, I get it! And have wondered the same thing so often, I have exhausted all Google searches; who knows?

alove2nv

**SPEACHLESS** So True!

NYCDoglvr

In terms of AA, alcoholic insanity refers to the action of daily drinking despite the bad consequences (hangovers, accidents, depression, failed relationships, all the loss).

hopeful4

I don't think alcoholism CAUSES anyone to be any of these things. I think the further down the path they go, the more they lose their filter so to speak. What seemed wrong to them before is not any longer. More like a change in judgement of what is acceptable and what is not.

NYCDoglvr

Spot on! "When the unacceptable becomes acceptable .........." It's part of the progression, the downward spiral, of the disease.

LeeJane

Speaking as a recovering A, I strongly agree with this. I look back now and cannot understand how I did the things I did and found them acceptable at the time. All personal morals and standards dropped away. Also I find it odd that I happily sat for endless hours just mindlessly drinking when there are so many other wonderful and worthwhile things to do in the world.

NYCDoglvr

Yes, me too. It's the same for codependents ... relationship gets progressively worse, the bar keeps getting lowered. And when you're finally physically and emotionally free of the old relationship you can't believe what you put up with.

Timeiskey

What I don't get is how my ex could drink several- I mean four or five (and that is just what I saw him drink) doubles - scotch or vodka- and not seemed to be completely inebriated. I understand the tolerance thing and at some point on many occasions he would just flip to being completely drunk and ridiculous, but four/five/six and hardly even slurring. But it was impacting his brain, right? Its hard to know when he drinks everyday. It is all crazy, every bit of it. I try to not think to much about it. When we first broke up, I was constantly reading and researching the topic...alas, I never really found any answers that provided comfort or insight. Don't think there is much of either to be found in the search.