SoberLife90

I just woke up from a terrible nightmare. I was hanging out with my brother and my friend and for some reason I drank a beer. I was soo ashamed of myself. I was a little angry at my brother that he would let me drink so easily in his presence, especially since I've came a very long way. Anyways my buddy Marty comes over and he sits down. I say to him "Marty, there's no easy way to say this, but last night I drank a beer." I was already upset, but after I said that his eyes became red and teary. I was ashamed of my self and had deep guilt. A big part was that I was gonna lose all my hard earned sobriety. This is a huge deal to me. In the dream I seen a bottle of xanax and I was thinking of getting high too, since I already drank a beer and had lost all my clean time. Even in the dream I though, screw it I'm just gonna stay sober. I'm not going to get high. I was relieved to say the least that it was all a dream! (Nightmare)

Anyways I woke up and texted my buddy. Wow that dream was terrifying. I thought I was about to have to hop on SoberRecocery.com and tell all my friends I relapsed. Even in my dream I was looking at the positives of this relapse. I was thinking well maybe now I can relate better to others who have relapsed, and I was just thinking well I just need to learn from this mistake and move forward.

So happy it was all a dream!

I have about 15 months sobriety, and when I was in my early early days I felt like I had these much more often. I don't usually have relapse dreams anymore.

How about you? Do you still have relapse dreams? How about any of you who are not in early recovery? Do you still have them?

ScottFromWI

I'm about 2 years in and I still have them occasionally. Heck, I gave up nicotine about 4 years ago and I still occasionally have dreams about that.

People have nightmares about all different things...I personally try not to read too much into them, I think it's really just your brain letting out pent up feelings.

SoberLeigh

I am almost 3 years into sobriety but still have those dreams, SoberLife. The two themes which always seem to run through the dreams is that the dream starts after I have taken the drink and that I am very unhappy about the drinking event; I find some comfort in that. If, in the dream, I was happy about the drinking event I might feel that my 'real life' program might need some improvement or enhancement.

Congratulations on almost 15 months.

Aellyce

Over 9 months here. Dreams.... well, this morning before waking I had a long, extremely vivid, and seemingly neverending epic nightmare, the kind I have not had for a good while. I am very used to all sorts of vivid dreams all the time and don't tend to get too hooked on them emotionally after waking, but this one did make me a bit uneasy for an hour or so. It wasn't about relapse, but about getting lost in a completely alien environment, trying to find my way "back" to where I started from, but instead, I got into all sorts of really weird "adventures" and encounters, many really disturbing, and yet I just wanted to see more and more despite the fear associated with the events. The more I wanted to find my way to my destination, the more I got lost and things became foreign. I tend to have many long lucid dreams and/or conscious moments in my dreams, and I recall wishing to have that in this dream last night, but it did not last... so it all seemed and felt extremely real. Unconscious.
But just a dream And easy for me to interpret also.

pakman

I've had these dreams a couple of times as well. Apparently these are common.. My group calls them 'freebies.'

I too am very relieved when I wake up.

bigsombrero

I've had some pretty earth-shattering relapse dreams. Most of them took place in my first year and a half of recovery. I had the same feelings you had on waking up.

They are much less frequent now. Maybe once every 6 months or so.

Soberwolf

completly relate