ItsJustMe89

So, once again, on the night of my 3rd day I am drinking. Why is the 3rd night a stumbling point for me? Why do I keep doing this?

I can't even tell you what the problem is...
I woke up from a hour long nap at 5pm. And I just knew when I woke up that instead of doing what I was planning on doing tonight, instead of waking up from my nap and getting ready for a meeting at 7:30, I was going to go out and grab some take home dinner and a bottle of Captain Morgan and diet coke, and come home and drink and surf the web for the night.

That was not my plan before I laid down to take a nap. My plan was to wake up and get ready for a meeting, go to the meeting, come home, eat dinner, go online, do some reading, and put myself to bed. And wake up on time in the morning and go to work.

But instead, I woke up from my nap and, knowing I was doing the wrong thing, decided to not respond to a voicemail mesg from another recovering alcoholic who was just reaching out for a friendly short phn convo... and instead of going to a meeting, go buy a bottle and come home to drink.

Not sure what triggered me to make the choice that I did. Maybe an unpleasant dream.. maybe the fact that I went 2 nights without drinking.. maybe sadness about the failed relationships and friendships in my life.. maybe I knew it would be hard to get to sleep tonight without drinking since I took a nap.

I don't know why I didn't call that recovering alcoholic back and tell her that I was having trouble not drinking tonight. Tell her that I was thinking about drinking and let her help talk me through my craving. I don't know why I didn't call my temporary sponsor. It was probably because I didn't want to get talked out of it. I knew what I was doing was wrong, but I wanted to do it anyway, so I didn't reach out for help when I got that craving.

Dee74

Day three was a problem for me too until I was determined it wouldn't be.

You already what you could have done...maybe you need to fight harder to do the things that are good for you do?

So you have any support besides sr? I know you're going to meetings - do you have any phone numbers of people to call next time you feel this way?

My advice now is to make a clear statement of intent to yourself and your addicted self - dump the rest of the booze - now - and start afresh with day one in the morning.
D

HappyBlue

Sounds like you might need to work out some better plan for day 3 and other trigger days in the future. Find some way to keep yourself occupied or go some place around other sober people.

matilda123

I'm very new at this, so I may not be the best to give advice, but your pattern is very familiar to me personally. I think that the questions that you're asking are the right ones: to figure out why this pattern is in place.

Although I wonder, too, if this is one of those "fake it until you make it" situations. That is, maybe you have convinced yourself, subconsciously, that you'll drink the third night, and thereby giving yourself inadvertent permission to drink? (I've definitely done that). Sometimes, I find understanding why I do what I do is important, but I can also be an overanalyzer. The key is just not to drink on that third day--maybe having someone with you that third night might give you the reinforcement you need?

PurpleKnight

If Day 3 is the hurdle, then on Day 3 I would lock myself in my house, not go anywhere, get a few numbers to call and hang out on SR, make some serious plans to ensure you make it to Day 4!!

For me it had to get that serious, to me Sobriety was that important!!

You can do this!!

least

I failed a lot early in recovery too. Until I'd had enough. I was finally sick and tired of always being sick and tired. I hope you can get past day three this time. Living sober is so much better than drinking.

ScottFromWI

Are you still drinking now? If so dumping out the rest of the bottle would be a good start. Then maybe you should hit a morning meeting? Perhaps you need a little more accountability until you get some sober time under your belt?

phoebe64

Day 3 and Thursdays are hard for me. I think on the 3rd day, I feel really good physically, and the AV wakes up with a vengeance, fighting to come back to being in charge.

Nuudawn

Ya..I believe the problem lies in your belief that you can't get through day 3. It's a resignation that allows your addiction to continue.
Of course you can get beyond day 3.
Decide to.
And do it.

Aellyce

Hi, I had a similar problem... except that I mostly could not go further than two days even. This is how my true journey started here back in January when I came back after a long break of mainly drunken posting here:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...d-day-2-a.html

It is indeed possible! I had a little slip a couple weeks after that post, but nothing since. Go for it, it is a journey that is worth it even just for the effort