A Little bit about me. Time For Change
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: Melbourne
Posts: 37
A Little bit about me. Time For Change
Growing up I was a very confident smart young boy, plenty of friends, girlfriends. I was one of those kids that my peers looked up to.
I had my first drink when i was around 15. My mates and I would buy a cask of goon, go to parties and basically get up to any mischief we could find.
As the years passed, slowly but surely this started becoming a regularly weekend thing. The more the years passed the more heavier the drinking became to an extent where i would binge drink up to 24 hours straight (md, ecstassy assisted).
As time went on, friends become scarce, i found myself not really caring who came and went from my life.
To make matters worse I started suffering from anxiety and depression and i guess i was just self-medicating by drinking. I found that no anti-depressant would help. Over time i realized that drinking was actually making the anxiety worse.
Now I am 27, had the most crazy past 2 years with Alcohol. I am very alone in this world. My family still care but I am hanging by a thread. All the good friends I once had have now far gone. My girlfriend of 4 years has pretty much packed her bags. I don't seem to care about life as much as what i once did.
The past year I have been drinking very heavy maybe like 3 times a week, but binge drinking 12+ hours every session.
I started noticing the next day after every heavy binge I was experiencing these weird and strange feelings (sweating, vertigo, confusion, etc) At first i put it down to Anxiety & Panic Attacks, but then realized it would occur between 8-12 hours after my last drink. Obviously it had to be the alcohol leaving my body. Over time these withdrawal effects have landed me hospital, however at the time it was all diagnosed as Panic Attacks.
I took a stance on Saturday to quit alcohol altogether. Looking into rehab facilities and AA Meetings, etc. I'm at the point where i am just so numb, it's hard to function and think rationally. My girlfriend says i show no emotion towards anything, and it has really taken a strangle hold on our relationship.
I have to mention that after 3-4 sober days I do start feeling more motivated and aspirational.
I would like to know where i can start, I know by myself i cannot kick the addiction. I would really just to live a normal life again, without alcohol being any player in my life. I look back at all my peers now, and most of them are very successful and it kinda pisses me off.
I have to mention that i do not drink everyday.
I really appreciate everyone reading, I just needed to share some of my story.
Thanks
I had my first drink when i was around 15. My mates and I would buy a cask of goon, go to parties and basically get up to any mischief we could find.
As the years passed, slowly but surely this started becoming a regularly weekend thing. The more the years passed the more heavier the drinking became to an extent where i would binge drink up to 24 hours straight (md, ecstassy assisted).
As time went on, friends become scarce, i found myself not really caring who came and went from my life.
To make matters worse I started suffering from anxiety and depression and i guess i was just self-medicating by drinking. I found that no anti-depressant would help. Over time i realized that drinking was actually making the anxiety worse.
Now I am 27, had the most crazy past 2 years with Alcohol. I am very alone in this world. My family still care but I am hanging by a thread. All the good friends I once had have now far gone. My girlfriend of 4 years has pretty much packed her bags. I don't seem to care about life as much as what i once did.
The past year I have been drinking very heavy maybe like 3 times a week, but binge drinking 12+ hours every session.
I started noticing the next day after every heavy binge I was experiencing these weird and strange feelings (sweating, vertigo, confusion, etc) At first i put it down to Anxiety & Panic Attacks, but then realized it would occur between 8-12 hours after my last drink. Obviously it had to be the alcohol leaving my body. Over time these withdrawal effects have landed me hospital, however at the time it was all diagnosed as Panic Attacks.
I took a stance on Saturday to quit alcohol altogether. Looking into rehab facilities and AA Meetings, etc. I'm at the point where i am just so numb, it's hard to function and think rationally. My girlfriend says i show no emotion towards anything, and it has really taken a strangle hold on our relationship.
I have to mention that after 3-4 sober days I do start feeling more motivated and aspirational.
I would like to know where i can start, I know by myself i cannot kick the addiction. I would really just to live a normal life again, without alcohol being any player in my life. I look back at all my peers now, and most of them are very successful and it kinda pisses me off.
I have to mention that i do not drink everyday.
I really appreciate everyone reading, I just needed to share some of my story.
Thanks
Last edited by DickySix; 10-27-2014 at 10:59 PM. Reason: Spelling
Member
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 38
Hey man, I'm 26 and in kind of a similar situation. One of the reasons I want to quit is because I know I won't ever be able to get a successful career going if I don't quit drinking. I'm a stand up comedian and have a budding film career in writing that I could very easily throw away if I continue to drink. I think it's easy to sort of let **** slide while you're in your twenties and everyone else is just figuring things out as well but I don't want to be stuck in my thirties at the same place and know I could have made a better life for myself if I hadn't wasted my twenties in anxiety and depression that was worsened by anxiety.
I'm not into AA myself. I'm looking for other resources. It would be great if it works for you but it just doesn't align with my world view.
I'm not into AA myself. I'm looking for other resources. It would be great if it works for you but it just doesn't align with my world view.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Engerland
Posts: 897
Thanks for your post.
I can really identify with the life passing me by stuff.
When I started drinking it was with my peers and was hell raising fun at times.
Then they got on with their lives.
Marriage, careers, children and home building.
I kept drinking and began to find myself alone propping up the bar, or in the company of those that drank like me.
People that lacked motivation and basically spent every day in the pub talking about what they planned to do.
In most cases it never happened.
So much passed me by.
And my drinking was to get worse and worse, until all the plates that I was trying to keep spinning hit the floor hard.
Today I suppose that I am playing 'catch up'.
Emotionally, spiritually and materially.
But so grateful that sober I have the chance to salvage and make better a life that I (and others) honestly thought was done not that long ago.
I wish you well, and hope that you keep posting.
G
I can really identify with the life passing me by stuff.
When I started drinking it was with my peers and was hell raising fun at times.
Then they got on with their lives.
Marriage, careers, children and home building.
I kept drinking and began to find myself alone propping up the bar, or in the company of those that drank like me.
People that lacked motivation and basically spent every day in the pub talking about what they planned to do.
In most cases it never happened.
So much passed me by.
And my drinking was to get worse and worse, until all the plates that I was trying to keep spinning hit the floor hard.
Today I suppose that I am playing 'catch up'.
Emotionally, spiritually and materially.
But so grateful that sober I have the chance to salvage and make better a life that I (and others) honestly thought was done not that long ago.
I wish you well, and hope that you keep posting.
G
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: Melbourne
Posts: 37
Yeah I am approaching my thirties and its making me have a real hard look at myself.
I own and run a clothing business but its just hanging by a thread just because I have continued to drink.
Lets hope for better and sober times!
I own and run a clothing business but its just hanging by a thread just because I have continued to drink.
Lets hope for better and sober times!
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Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Posts: 1,476
G'day DS
Your story sounds a lot like mine.
Captain of the cricket team, captain of the footy team, girls came and went with little effort on my part.
Sports fell away by early twenties and I went to London and partied like a mad man, including DJ'ing at clubs and raves... It was during this time I started having my first lot of panic attacks... Which I largely attributed to the drugs, so I gave those up, but I never quit booze.
I progressed from huge amounts of booze 2-3 times a week to lesser quantities 5-6 times a week (I thought one day off meant I didn't have a problem... Lol)
I too noticed most of my friends were going ahead with careers and had cool cars... I was DJ'ing and had a crappy part time job and my car was unroadworthy, unregistered and worth about $500
Anyway... It all went pear shaped at age 35.
Be good to see you get off the merry go round before I did... I can promise you... It gets worse and it gets harder to stop drinking the longer you drink.
Good luck with your decisions mate
Your story sounds a lot like mine.
Captain of the cricket team, captain of the footy team, girls came and went with little effort on my part.
Sports fell away by early twenties and I went to London and partied like a mad man, including DJ'ing at clubs and raves... It was during this time I started having my first lot of panic attacks... Which I largely attributed to the drugs, so I gave those up, but I never quit booze.
I progressed from huge amounts of booze 2-3 times a week to lesser quantities 5-6 times a week (I thought one day off meant I didn't have a problem... Lol)
I too noticed most of my friends were going ahead with careers and had cool cars... I was DJ'ing and had a crappy part time job and my car was unroadworthy, unregistered and worth about $500
Anyway... It all went pear shaped at age 35.
Be good to see you get off the merry go round before I did... I can promise you... It gets worse and it gets harder to stop drinking the longer you drink.
Good luck with your decisions mate
Life is an unlikely miracle.
Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: England
Posts: 1,859
Welcome, and congrats on a good decision. Don't think there is one of us here who didn't wish they had given up the drink at an earlier age !
I'm 52 and most of my working life has passed me by. Too late for a career now, all I can do is pick up the pieces.
Stick around .
I'm 52 and most of my working life has passed me by. Too late for a career now, all I can do is pick up the pieces.
Stick around .
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