zelt

Hello,

So, this past weekend i had a Friday night Saturday night binge and things weren't too bad i did get into an argument with a friend on Friday tha almost got physical but didn't and all was good the next day. Funny how bad this has gotten for me though if a night where i only have one little argument is considered a good night by me..

Thing is i'm a binge drinker and whilst right now i'm on my lunch break at work on a Monday and am in the mindset of wanting to give up drinking i know that by the time Friday comes around i'll be like F##k it! Let's have a drink. This upcoming weekend is a long weekend here in Melbourne (Monday and Tuesday off too) As of right now i really like the idea of not drinking but we'll soon see. I want to stop, i often dream of a sober life, however i always say to myself before i drink.. "I'll be good tonight!" But more often than not, that doesn't turn out to be the case. Do you think it's possible that i'm just not quite ready to put the bottle down yet? Will i ever be ready?

Raider

You will know when you are ready. Praying you don't wait until it's too late.

Hawks

Do you think it's possible that i'm just not quite ready to put the bottle down yet?

Seems like the case.

Will i ever be ready?

Yes

You already seem to sense your in too deep with booze.
The seed has been planted.

See you in recovery one day

Soberwolf

What Hawks said

bookmaven

What has to happen for you to be ready? A trip to jail? A failing liver?

I tried soooooooooooo hard to "be good" and "just have one" but I'm addicted to alcohol. I don't have a stop button.

I could never stop drinking once I started.

The only choice I have is to not drink in the first place.

Nonsensical

Many people relate to the concept of being ready, but I do not. I wanted to stop long before I did, but I didn't know how or what it meant to be addicted to alcohol. Might just be semantics, but I felt ready long before I got sober.

Bottom line is it doesn't matter what we think. What do YOU think?

ScottFromWI

Anything is possible, including sobriety. It won't happen simply by dreaming though, you will need to take the time and effort to achieve it. You will also need to accept that you can never "be good" or "have just a few". It is simply a fact of life that alcoholics cannot do those things, an never will be able to.

For me the turning point was when I needed to drink just to avoid withdrawals and keep my heart rate down. Some wait much longer until they lose their jobs, families, etc. Some never reach that point and they die because of their drinking. I hope you can make the choice to live sober before any of those things happen to you, because it is a choice you can make...today if you want.

Dee74

Hi zeit

It's scary what becomes normal isn't t it - a fight with a mate that almost became physical was not 'too bad' of a night?

I think some part of you wants to quit or you wouldn't be here. As great a collection of humanity as we are here, noone hangs out here for the ambience, yeah?

I don't know about you, but my fear of change, and my hope that one day I'd learn to drink without bad stuff happening, kept me from quitting for about 15 years longer than it should have been..

Declaring myself 'not ready' was the excuse really.

D

Kevin78

Better trying to get into recovery asap Zelt. It will only get worse if your drinking goes on m8. I have binged on and off for probably the last 15-20 years. The withdrawals get worse.

12 days sober today, My head is already beginning to sort itself out.

MavisTheFairy13

Well...the drink is already causing you problems. I tried for ages to moderate but couldn't. I was worried that without alcohol I would never have fun, never feel happy. I've finally realised that I can be happy and have fun without it. And loving the money im saving and feeling more healthy and energetic.

You will only do this when you have decided that though. Are you ready now?

MelindaFlowers

The elevator keeps going down, man. I got in arguments that did become physical and I pushed my guy a few times. I was not ready to stop. I blacked out, fell down and busted my chin and woke up with blood all over my shirt. I was not ready to stop. One day at work I was so hung over I couldn't even read email without getting up and pacing around the room halfway through. I was not ready to stop. Finally went to the doctor and found out I was really damaging my body. I was finally ready to stop.

You can get off the elevator on any floor. How much lower do you want to go?

instant

Its cyclical .rinse and repeat. Until the end.

MsTriste

It sounds to me like you've already given yourself permission to drink, in your sub-conscious mind. But your conscious mind is telling you that you want to stay on the sober path you've recently started. A battle is being waged. Which side will you pick?

I'm on day 4 myself, and finding this forum yesterday is helping immensely. Anytime I'm feeling that battle, I can come here and read and share and get encouragement.

heartcore

I suspect that every single person on here didnt feel "ready" on that night or morning when they set down the bottle or glass of what was to be their last drink.

They may have been scared at what was happening to them via alcohol - difficulties with partners, friends, health, money, reputation. They may have been frustrated with self, feeling shame, or simply exhausted by the cycle. But ready?

Just as no parent is truly ready for what is to come at the moment their child is born. They may be fearful or excited, apprehensive and thrilled simultaneously. They are not ready, because there is no way they could be fully prepared for the daily joys & challenges that are about to confront them. But it is just life, happening, and we become ready as we have the experience. Like a soldier headed to war. You grow into an experience, each day readies you for the next, but not really.

Sobriety is like that, for me, at least. What I can tell you from day 71 is that I wasn't ready, though I wanted to change more than anything else, and I am delighted with who I am becoming. Ready or not, here I come...

Meraviglioso

Me too. I was ready a long time ago, only now finally doing something about it. I think some people wait to wake up one day and just be ready and think that it'll mean it takes less work. For some this seems to be the case, for others- like me and Nonsensical here- it is not.

Croissant

I agree. I also think it's not just a public holiday in Melbourne, it's Melbourne Cup day...which is an excuse for a booze up.

Now....there's nothing "wrong" perse with not being ready to give up. But here's the thing....no attempt at sobriety will be successful until you learn to be honest with yourself.

So be honest and call it for what it is and deal with it like that. You see an opportunity to drink on the horizon, your booze brain is telling you, "meh, last time I drank I got out pretty much unscathed"....

There's no right or wrong answer, but let's be honest about what's really going on here.

JanieJ

THIS !!! It's time to stop. We will support you, all the way. Stop before you lose all your friends, your health and everything else.

Glad you found us, hope you decide that it's time now. You won't regret it.

dcrr

Don't wait until you have hit your rock bottom. Stay sober, create some good memories and save your health. We are all here for you and you can do it!