YELL at ME please!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: New England
Posts: 1,926
YELL at ME please!
So it's day 4. The day I always drink! (Since relapsing). And guess what I did? DRANK!
I was literally craving ALL freaking day!
Craving all through my kids soccer games....used every tool in the book. Still drank at a bar!
PLEASE be brutal! None of this ***** crap! I need to be hit over the head or I will DIE!
Sorry for letting everyone down!
:-(
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I was literally craving ALL freaking day!
Craving all through my kids soccer games....used every tool in the book. Still drank at a bar!
PLEASE be brutal! None of this ***** crap! I need to be hit over the head or I will DIE!
Sorry for letting everyone down!
:-(
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: New England
Posts: 1,926
Originally Posted by Marcher13 
Why didn't you come and talk to us before you went into the bar Serenidad? You would have had a lot of support to stop you going in.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,426
Yelling never did any good for me.
All it did was reinforce the manchild thing I had going on.
Being the naughty boy absolved me of responsibility in a way.
Drinkings what alkies do (like you just said 'alcohol is the devil') ...
I obviously needed an appropriate adult and 'they' let me down by not providing one.
Yet..when someone did appoint themselves appropriate adult, I resented them for it.
win win for an alcoholic really...
You don't need to be castigated - you need to work out what's wrong with your recovery plan Serenidad.
You need to work this out cos noone else can do it for you.
whats your plan for when cravings hit? Do you have a Plan B C and D?
Did you use them all?
do you have numbers to call?
and the biggie...why, with everything you're trying to do, would you go to a bar?
I don't need to know the answers Serenidad, but you really do, y'know?
I hope you can work out what you need to add this time
D
All it did was reinforce the manchild thing I had going on.
Being the naughty boy absolved me of responsibility in a way.
Drinkings what alkies do (like you just said 'alcohol is the devil') ...
I obviously needed an appropriate adult and 'they' let me down by not providing one.
Yet..when someone did appoint themselves appropriate adult, I resented them for it.
win win for an alcoholic really...
You don't need to be castigated - you need to work out what's wrong with your recovery plan Serenidad.
You need to work this out cos noone else can do it for you.
whats your plan for when cravings hit? Do you have a Plan B C and D?
Did you use them all?
do you have numbers to call?
and the biggie...why, with everything you're trying to do, would you go to a bar?
I don't need to know the answers Serenidad, but you really do, y'know?
I hope you can work out what you need to add this time
D
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: Iowa
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Remember, you idiot, (There you were yelled at in a really loud voice) that you end up doing what it is that you really want to do. If you don't - really don't - want to drink then don't.
If you REALLY don't want to drink then go through whatever it is you have to go through and DON'T DRINK. DAMNIT!!!!!!!
If you REALLY don't want to drink then go through whatever it is you have to go through and DON'T DRINK. DAMNIT!!!!!!!
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Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: New England
Posts: 1,926
Originally Posted by least
What do you want me to yell at you? You're already beating yourself up pretty good. 
Do something different this time. Whatever you were doing isn't working.
Do something different this time. Whatever you were doing isn't working.Sent from my iPhone using SoberRecovery
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Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: New England
Posts: 1,926
Originally Posted by trachemys
If you know day 4 is going to be a problem, then by all means do day 4 differently!Should I take day 4 off work? Want should I do?
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Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 3,539
You need a plan. How about a plan that puts you in a situation that is impossible (or nearly so) to drink for day 4 and day 5.... and perhaps day 6. This is a physical thing and you need to get past it. (IMO) How about you glue yourself to someone from AA who knows what you are attempting to do for these few days?
Whatever it is do it differently! (Please note, all this is was said while yelling, . . lovingly)
Whatever it is do it differently! (Please note, all this is was said while yelling, . . lovingly)
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Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,634
Serenidad -
Dee offers some good advice.
We aren't you, so we can't tell what your plan should be to get you through Day 4.
But I bet you can by looking at today's relapse, understanding what drove you to drink, identifying what you would do differently next time, and putting that into your plan proactively.
Good luck.
Dee offers some good advice.
We aren't you, so we can't tell what your plan should be to get you through Day 4.
But I bet you can by looking at today's relapse, understanding what drove you to drink, identifying what you would do differently next time, and putting that into your plan proactively.
Good luck.
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Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: New England
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Originally Posted by awuh1
You need a plan. How about a plan that puts you in a situation that is impossible (or nearly so) to drink for day 4 and day 5.... and perhaps day 6. This is a physical thing and you need to get past it. (IMO) How about you glue yourself to someone from AA who knows what you are attempting to do for these few days? Whatever it is do it differently! (Please note, all this is was said while yelling, . . lovingly)
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Join Date: Oct 2013
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You know what? I yell at my kids to do stuff after asking them, in many different ways and nicely, and they always, invariably turn a deaf ear to me no matter which method I use. Yelling isn't a substitute for a solid plan for day 4.
If your AV is telling you on day for to go in "x" direction, go in "y" instead. Don't go in bars. Don't go places that serve alcohol. Don't go to stores that sell alcohol. Go to an AA meeting. Reach out here, loud and clear, that you are having trouble. You only go through the pain of battling the urges temporarily. They do ease up. Recognize them for what they are but don't give in. You are aware enough to see and know your pattern. What can you change? Or are you always telling yourself "well, it's day 4. I can never get past day 4." So you don't get past day four. Self fulfilling prophecy.
Beating yourself up and us yelling at you won't change things or make them better. Go to bed. Tomorrow is a new day.
If your AV is telling you on day for to go in "x" direction, go in "y" instead. Don't go in bars. Don't go places that serve alcohol. Don't go to stores that sell alcohol. Go to an AA meeting. Reach out here, loud and clear, that you are having trouble. You only go through the pain of battling the urges temporarily. They do ease up. Recognize them for what they are but don't give in. You are aware enough to see and know your pattern. What can you change? Or are you always telling yourself "well, it's day 4. I can never get past day 4." So you don't get past day four. Self fulfilling prophecy.
Beating yourself up and us yelling at you won't change things or make them better. Go to bed. Tomorrow is a new day.
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Join Date: May 2014
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for me i just got my bum on an aa seat, its hard to ignore my drink problem when i am surrounded by others who have the same problem and just listening to them takes my mind off how i might be feeling its hard to explain how it feels being in a meeting when your in need of a drink but it worked everytime for me when ever my head was battering me over drink
so it might be an idea on your day 4 that you might try a meeting ? whatever your doing at the moment clearly isnt working so its time maybe to do a bit more ?
like i said its so hard to ignore people who are sober in aa meetings and the length of time they have been sober is amazing
so something is clearly working there thats what appealed to me is these guys in aa had something that i wanted they were sober and i couldnt do it so i let them help me and show me how they did it
it might just work for you to if you give it a try ?
so it might be an idea on your day 4 that you might try a meeting ? whatever your doing at the moment clearly isnt working so its time maybe to do a bit more ?
like i said its so hard to ignore people who are sober in aa meetings and the length of time they have been sober is amazing
so something is clearly working there thats what appealed to me is these guys in aa had something that i wanted they were sober and i couldnt do it so i let them help me and show me how they did it
it might just work for you to if you give it a try ?
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Join Date: Mar 2014
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I call bull sheet. Why day four? Is it always day four? Seems to me you look forward to day four so you can drink and use "day four" as an excuse.
As was already said, DON'T COUNT DAYS. Don't count the days for a while. Make every day day 1. And mean it. Get through day 1 is all you have to do. tomorrow is day 1 again. Treat it like it is day one and that you want this so bad you will do anything to avoid a drink - "I just need to get through THIS day. That's a simple approach, but you know what? It seems to have worked for a lot of people.
Every day is day one. Every day is the first day of the rest of your life. Make it count.
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I haven't had a chance to read the responses to my thread but I PRAY that they were HARSH! You see....I am dying. Just like the rest of the alcoholics that chose to continue to drink. I hate myself right now. I feel extremely hopeless.
I feel like I let everyone down but that's the story of my life.
If you are sober....please stay that way! Please don't drink! It's hell!
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I feel like I let everyone down but that's the story of my life.
If you are sober....please stay that way! Please don't drink! It's hell!
Sent from my iPhone using SoberRecovery
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