petals

Im wondering what words are the best way to say I don't drink?
I want to sound firm and positive but not over confident.
Everyone knows how fond I am of wine....
Should it be....I don't drink anymore
I've stopped
I've given up


I've read a fare few of the books suggested on sr and don't want to mess with my own head by accidently planting negative thoughts into my own head by saying it wrong
Sorry if this post is a bit silly but it's worrying me....and I've got a holiday coming up with hubby and family. ...they all drink and its going to be a tough one.
Then there is Christmas to tackle. ...
Xx

Meraviglioso

I think it depends on who you are talking to and how much you want to go into it.
No, thank you is sufficient for strangers when offered alcohol. For people who know me and know I used to drink I say "I am not drinking anymore"
If asked why I say one of the following depending on how close my relationship with the person is or how much I want to be open
"I have found I feel a lot better without alcohol"
"I was becoming concerned about the amount I was drinking so I decided to stop"
"I just want to take a break from alcohol"

Dee74

When I first gave up I had these huge essays of explanation ready in my mind...As time went on I realised that the vast majority of people simply don't find drinking as important as I did, and they don't really care whether I drink or not, or what I choose to drink.

Honestly 'no thanks I don't drink' has served me well for 99.99 percent of occasions over the last seven plus years, petals.

It's a big a deal as you make it

D

fantail

Usually no one asks any questions, but if they do, I just skip the negative stuff and tell the truth about the positive stuff. As Meraviglioso suggests, "I feel a lot better when I'm not drinking" is simple and people understand it. I also sometimes will talk about my yoga practice, focusing on my health, my energy levels, or sometimes just "I gave it a try and liked it so much I decided to continue!"

When I start off that way, on the rare occasion that someone is interested and wants to talk about it, I've set myself up to be totally honest. I just talk about how good things are for me etc. It's all true, I just skipped the "and the reason I gave it a try was because I was a mess" part.

MythOfSisyphus

This! At first I expected to have to defend my decision not to drink like it was a doctoral dissertation! 95% of the time people just said, "Okay". They didn't care. Drinking is a big deal to drunks, not to normal drinkers. I didn't "get it" at first. I assumed everyone drank a lot all the time!

Meraviglioso

I remember I was out with my boyfriend and a group for for an aperitivo (cocktail/happy hour) I was so worried, what am I going to drink, what am I going to say, what will they say…
Someone was going to the bar to grab drinks and going around asking people what they wanted "glass of white wine, a beer, a gin and tonic…" they asked me what I wanted and I was feeling all weird and said "no thanks" they paused and said "water? coffee? anything?" I said "no" and then they moved on to the next person. No one noticed or cared at all.

least

I think just a simple "no thanks, I don't drink anymore" ought to do it. And if they ask you why, you can just say you feel better without it.

Soberwolf

Like D said its a no thanks i dont drink from me aswell

fridgey

my body is a temple
I'm detoxing
just not today, tonight
I prefer water
Drinking makes feel unwell
Yes, I'll have a water, juice, coffee

jshep

All excellent suggestions above and I found "No, thanks" also works. Most people don't care and those who ask questions really need little more than "I don't drink".

And I really like fridgey's "Yes, I'll have a water (or juice or coffee)"

petals

Thanks guy's. ...perhaps I'm overthinking and worrying as usual. Xx

margherita

You can just say you are taking a break from drinking for health reasons. Nowadays everyone is obsessed with this idea of healthy living (hence nature, organic food etc). Say you are detoxing for a while and will see how it goes. A lot of my friends are taking breaks from drinking for "detox" and they are not alcoholics at all! It seems like the cool and trendy thing to do these days

Suziequeue

I've decided mine will be "I seem to have lost my taste for it", which I have - I certainly have lost my "taste" for feeling ill and unhealthy

Anna

'No thanks' really does work.

I refused to sound like I was apologizing for the fact I didn't drink.

Fly N Buy

OMG - do you know what your asking? Do you know WTH alcohol does to me? Do you realize how messed up things become when I drink? Wow, I cannot believe you would ever encourage me to drink???? Why your no friend at all!!!!


Hmmm, the alcoholic thinking......

Thanks for offering, but I am not drinking today is my typical response with those who are casual friends. Others pretty much know my path at this point....

You're doing great! Keep it up!
Hope you don't mind the feeble attempt at humor.....

ghostdad

The few events I attended after I stopped drinking were not as big a deal as I had thought in my own head. No one seemed to really care what I was drinking which proves we do make a bigger deal out of it than we need to. Don't worry about things you have no control over and take it one holiday at a time. Best wishes.

petals

Thanks again.
Hey flynbuy I chuckled at what you wrote.... can you imagine their faces if I actually said it? X

PurpleKnight

"I'm not drinking today, I'll have a water please"

Keep it simple, after a while of not drinking "today", people will simply accept it as the norm!!