Kraszy

Hi all,

My name is Joe. Nice to meet all of you wonderful people. I've been lurking the past several days (i swear I'm not a creeper) reading lots of posts and such, and reading a lot of your stories brought me to tears because I identify with a lot of them.

Of course, I'm here posting because I think I have a problem. I binge drink like a sonuva bitch. I'm 32, been doing it since I was 18. I think I can control it but I really can't. I type this to you with quite a buzz going, unfortunately. I'd like to think I'm a functioning alcoholic, if there is such a thing. I was on day 3 today of not drinking (one of many day 3's), the wife left to go to a school function with the kids, I was by myself and with a bottle of bourbon, you know how the rest goes.

I've been trying to cut back my drinking and it's been quite difficult. At the most, I've been able to go 2-3 days without drinking. There's always some excuse to "celebrate" - oh it's friday after a long work week...there's a flyers game on saturday night, the eagles play at 1 sunday afternoon, work sucks - it's hump day, time for a few fingers of bourbon, it's oktoberfest, there's a halloween party, holiday after holiday, etc. Any excuse there is to imbibe, I'm there.

there's a lot more story to tell than the lot of you care to read, so I'll end it there for now. I just wanted to introduce myself and my problem, and let you all know that I look forward to getting to know you all and hopefully we can help out one another. If you've read this far, thank you and hope to hear from you soon,

Joe

Dee74

Welcome to SR Joe
Support made all the difference for me - I hope we can help you turn your life around too

It might make it easier if you have an alcohol free house for a while - is that feasible?

D

trachemys

if you'll equate three fingers of bourbon with the proper equivalent: death..we have common ground.

Changel

Hey Kraszy Joe. I am new here too. Welcome.

margherita

Welcome. Have you ever been to an AA meeting? I suggest that you try a couple of meetings, they have been helping me a lot. Just seeing and hearing all these people with the same exact problem is a huge support system for me.

XIIIXXIXXVI

Welcome to SR, Joe! You'll find tons of support around here. Best of luck to you!

B

MavisTheFairy13

Hi and welcome

Kraszy

Thanks for the replies, guys. I think the support will help me tremendously. I don't have a lot of friends/family (mostly because of alcohol/bat-**** crazy family). My closest friend is a raging alcoholic himself. As a guy who married young and a dad of two young boys (8 and 6), over the years I've lost friends and a social life that I've had and replaced them all with alcohol. So immediate support is pretty minimum.

My wife of almost 9 years just lost her father and grandmother this summer, who both raised her, and she comes from a fairly broken home; both of our boys have special needs, so I'm trying hard to be her rock. I do that pretty well, but with that comes a lot of booze after all is said and done, and, as such, sacrifices my own health.

I have my own family issues, which I'm sure are the very root of my alcoholism, but we can come to that another time.

I very much appreciate your responses. I know I have a lot to work through, alcohol being first and foremost.

I've never been to an AA meeting, been kind of afraid of the stigma of it (where would I tell my wife I'm going, etc). As far as being in an alcohol free house - I have this thing about being wasteful, so discarding any alcohol in our house that we've already spent our hard earned money on would be a difficult task. I know I suck at this. This is why I'm here.

fantail

Hi Joe! If you do want to attend an in person meeting, I know that here there are quite a few that meet around the lunch hour, so you might be able to go without taking away from family time.

I can understand not wanting to tell your wife about the full extent of your worries yet, it sounds like she's got a lot to cope with right now. But at the very least it's probably best to let her know that you've decided to stop drinking. You can tell her that you don't think you have a healthy relationship with alcohol right now without dropping the word "alcoholic". That might give you some more support and accountability while still giving you some time to decide whether it's the right time to tell her that you think you should stop for good.

In any event, this is a great place with lots of supportive people to help you through. Welcome & good luck!

5KRunner

Welcome to SR!

Our stories are almost identical - I'm the same age as you, had the same drinking habits (major bingeing), also started drinking at 18, married and had kids relatively young, terrible family issues in childhood, sports and holidays used to be a trigger for drinking, etc. etc. I could keep going.

I went to bed sober last night and woke up this morning to my 24th day of complete and total abstinence from alcohol. Life is good.

I am happy to be of support to you at any time. Please feel free to PM me whenever you want.

SR is a wonderful community and you will find many supportive people here.

least

Welcome to the family. I hope our support can help you stop drinking for good.

JanieJ

Welcome,Joe. I'm on day 13 of sobriety, and would not have come this far without these guys on this forum.

I have learnt here that once you decide you need to stop, you then need to have a plan of action-what will you do when the urge to drink comes ? How will you deal with it ? What will you do instead ?

There's lots of info on this site which can help with that. A really good bit of of advice from these guys is, take it day by day, promise not to drink just for today.

Stevie1

Welcome, Kraszy.

Most of have found that cutting back and trying to "moderate" doesn't work at all, so it's good that you are coming to that realisation now.

As for AA having a stigma - well maybe for some, although I have a couple of wealthy and successful clients who are AA regulars. Better that than the stigma of being known as a drunk, no?

Hope you keep coming back!

johnny821

Hi Joe. My name is Jon. Much like yourself, this is my first post on here. I am 31 as well, and have a situation somewhat similar to your's. I am on day 4 of no drinking, but I have a day 4 every week. I only drink on Friday nights, Saturdays and Sunday's, no problem right? But on those days I sure do make up for lost time. Every time I tell myself it will only be three beers, but after that first one all I want is more. Next thing I know I'm waking up the next morning to my Fiancé crying because she had to help me to bed the night before because I passed out on the floor again. However, this Monday morning when I saw the pain I was causing her, something inside of me snapped and I knew I had to stop. I have found these posts very helpful, hopefully this can help you some too. I know it is nice to know that I am not in this alone.

MnEman

Welcome krazy and johnie. Your stories are both very familiar to me, and a lot of other good folks here. Keep reading and posting, and check back often. You both sound like you might be ready for a change. It probably won't be easy, but I guarante it will be worth it.

Eric

PurpleKnight

Welcome to the Forum Joe!! Great to have you onboard!!

Cecilia44

Welcome Joe! Lots of great support and advice here.

As far as being in an alcohol free house - I have this thing about being wasteful, so discarding any alcohol in our house that we've already spent our hard earned money on would be a difficult task.


Can you return it where you bought it from or give it to someone? Like maybe as an early Christmas gift? Having alcohol around you all the time makes it that much harder.

Good luck.

Kraszy

Thank you so much for your kind words everyone. I can see that you all are going to instrumental in getting me sobered up. Hopefully I can return the favor and pay it forward one day. A couple of you sound like you're long lost twins haha so I'll definitely be reaching out to you guys if that's okay.

I went very overboard last night, passed out in my recliner in the middle of playing a game of Madden, woke up at 4am, not having eaten any dinner, stumbled my sorry butt to bed and didn't wake up until 11 this morning with a nasty hangover that I haven't had in a long time. I'm completely disgusted with myself today. Maybe that was a good thing because I don't want a drop right now. It's a long, bumpy road ahead.

Rachinator

Welcome Kraszy. I too thought I was a creeper for many weeks. Stay strong. Remember you want to be the rock for your wife. The rock that she wants to anchor to, not the one to bring her under. You can do it

Kraszy

Love this. Thank you.