toolbox idea - share yours pls
learning to live
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,665
toolbox idea - share yours pls
I just got all my old journals together from 2009 and took a flip through the pages/years comparing drunk times to peaceful/happy times.
It seems in the past I forget how bad it gets after a lapse of sobriety resulting in relapse. Well, tonight I found one of the tools to add to my toolbox for that.
When my AV starts chiming I will compare the two. I even marked with bookmarks; misery (active drinking) & happy/peace (sobriety).
Although "make a plan" sounded so simple as I heard it on SR all the time I don't think I "got" that til this go round.
Hey, I am determined not to relapse this time SO whatever it takes, right
I need all the tools I can in the recovery toolbox!
On another note:
I noticed certain spaces of journals had been ripped out & I have a ponder that is most likely when things were "really bad"...denial at its finest.
I also know I have struggled with alcohol abuse since 2004-2005ish but it's funny in those years I no where mention alcohol. Maybe I started admitting in 09. Man this disease is progressive, aint it?
Just happy to be here and sober today with all of you on SR I wanted to share that "tool" as it was powerful for me.
Feel free to share your tools below if you would like. Someone may benefit from them, including me!!
It seems in the past I forget how bad it gets after a lapse of sobriety resulting in relapse. Well, tonight I found one of the tools to add to my toolbox for that.
When my AV starts chiming I will compare the two. I even marked with bookmarks; misery (active drinking) & happy/peace (sobriety).
Although "make a plan" sounded so simple as I heard it on SR all the time I don't think I "got" that til this go round.
Hey, I am determined not to relapse this time SO whatever it takes, right
I need all the tools I can in the recovery toolbox!
On another note:
I noticed certain spaces of journals had been ripped out & I have a ponder that is most likely when things were "really bad"...denial at its finest.
I also know I have struggled with alcohol abuse since 2004-2005ish but it's funny in those years I no where mention alcohol. Maybe I started admitting in 09. Man this disease is progressive, aint it?
Just happy to be here and sober today with all of you on SR
I wanted to share that "tool" as it was powerful for me.Feel free to share your tools below if you would like. Someone may benefit from them, including me!!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 831
Great idea!
I know they make a lot of people cringe, but I love the slogans/sayings and actually find them quite helpful.
Some of my favorites:
ODAAT - One day at a time
FINE - F'ed up, insecure, neurotic, and emotional
HALT - (don't get too) hungry, angry, lonely, or tired
This too shall pass
And one I learned from my SR friends, Rule #62
I know they make a lot of people cringe, but I love the slogans/sayings and actually find them quite helpful.
Some of my favorites:
ODAAT - One day at a time
FINE - F'ed up, insecure, neurotic, and emotional
HALT - (don't get too) hungry, angry, lonely, or tired
This too shall pass
And one I learned from my SR friends, Rule #62
learning to live
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,665
Yes, bookmaven! I like the slogans too!! My fave (and I tell myself this often) is KISS...keep it simple stupid and I usually add an A behind that 
I have never heard FINE..I like it! so thanks!
Another tool I have is GOOGLE "benefits of sobriety".... "motivational quotes" they seem to take my mind to a new place....most importantly away from MYSELF!
I have never heard FINE..I like it! so thanks!
Another tool I have is GOOGLE "benefits of sobriety".... "motivational quotes" they seem to take my mind to a new place....most importantly away from MYSELF!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: New York
Posts: 59
I found these quotes and I really like them:
Every alcoholic's favorite brand: More!
Alcoholic: Someone who refuses to give up a life of failure without a fight. (lol)
Bottom: When things get worse faster than you can lower your standards.
Only an alcoholic would believe that the solution to loneliness was isolation.
Some people think alcoholism is a two-fold disease--more and right now.
I don’t come to AA because I can’t drink I come to AA because I can drink.
An alcoholic is someone who finds something that works and then stops doing it.
and my favorite:
Blackouts: Maybe they are not such a bad thing--the stuff we remember is bad enough!
Every alcoholic's favorite brand: More!
Alcoholic: Someone who refuses to give up a life of failure without a fight. (lol)
Bottom: When things get worse faster than you can lower your standards.
Only an alcoholic would believe that the solution to loneliness was isolation.
Some people think alcoholism is a two-fold disease--more and right now.
I don’t come to AA because I can’t drink I come to AA because I can drink.
An alcoholic is someone who finds something that works and then stops doing it.
and my favorite:
Blackouts: Maybe they are not such a bad thing--the stuff we remember is bad enough!
Sober Alcoholic
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 3,539
Good topic growpath.
I think many people need tools in order to help them make their own tools.
For example, you wrote in journals. This allows you now read about past events, accurately remember how you experienced them and say to yourself, "instead of drink, if something like that ever happens again, I'm going to do X,Y and Z". In this way you craft an alternate set of future behaviors.
Other people can do this by sitting down an remembering the reasons were involved in their past relapses. Journals are a bit better, but just reflecting on past events can be almost as good. In any event, if enough of these relapses are considered, a pattern often emerges. For me, relapses involved either stress, depression, anxiety and/or fear. I needed specific action plans for a variety of situations and emotions. I had to have a very specific plan for what I would do in the event I found myself in that same past situation.
I also needed to take proactive steps to minimize the likelihood that these situations did not come up. For example, I did not go to events where alcohol was served. I also needed to minimize the likelihood I would become depressed, because depression would also lead to drinking.
This can all seem very overwhelming in the beginning, so a lot of support is typically a good idea. It helps many people to go to a counselor, a treatment program or to AA for that support.
Tools and a plan are essential, at least for those of us who could not just decide to quit with use of our willpower alone.
For those who are new, remember that there is a lesson in every relapse, and potentially another tool and a better plan for the work ahead.
I think many people need tools in order to help them make their own tools.
For example, you wrote in journals. This allows you now read about past events, accurately remember how you experienced them and say to yourself, "instead of drink, if something like that ever happens again, I'm going to do X,Y and Z". In this way you craft an alternate set of future behaviors.
Other people can do this by sitting down an remembering the reasons were involved in their past relapses. Journals are a bit better, but just reflecting on past events can be almost as good. In any event, if enough of these relapses are considered, a pattern often emerges. For me, relapses involved either stress, depression, anxiety and/or fear. I needed specific action plans for a variety of situations and emotions. I had to have a very specific plan for what I would do in the event I found myself in that same past situation.
I also needed to take proactive steps to minimize the likelihood that these situations did not come up. For example, I did not go to events where alcohol was served. I also needed to minimize the likelihood I would become depressed, because depression would also lead to drinking.
This can all seem very overwhelming in the beginning, so a lot of support is typically a good idea. It helps many people to go to a counselor, a treatment program or to AA for that support.
Tools and a plan are essential, at least for those of us who could not just decide to quit with use of our willpower alone.
For those who are new, remember that there is a lesson in every relapse, and potentially another tool and a better plan for the work ahead.
as a sober contributor
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: California
Posts: 1,312
I have a few simple tools that I'll share...
Just do the next right thing. This is my #1 rule in life.
Exercise. Do something active EVERY day.
Listen to music. It doesn't matter what kind but it should be an artist you enjoy.
Smile at people you don't know.... especially children. When they smile back, it feels great.
Be kind. Open doors for people. Return a shopping cart for someone. Lend a hand whenever you can.
Be good to yourself. Eat well. Positive self talk works wonders.
Tell your loved ones that you love them. All too often they will be gone before you can....
Just do the next right thing. This is my #1 rule in life.
Exercise. Do something active EVERY day.
Listen to music. It doesn't matter what kind but it should be an artist you enjoy.
Smile at people you don't know.... especially children. When they smile back, it feels great.
Be kind. Open doors for people. Return a shopping cart for someone. Lend a hand whenever you can.
Be good to yourself. Eat well. Positive self talk works wonders.
Tell your loved ones that you love them. All too often they will be gone before you can....
learning to live
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,665
thanks for the responses guys! I enjoyed reading all of these.Dee - ya got the helping others gig in the bag
Hope - your list was like reading a lot of my own. Awesome
Marg - Thanks for the laugh. We alcoholics are some stubborn bunches, aren't we. lol
Awuh - I keep reading your post over and over thank you for posting
I liked how you said to have a plan when a certain relapse trigger emotion occurs. I need those plans. As of now it is get in the car and drive away. Does that count? lol No, I got AA meeting, cardio, run etc on the list and a couple more ideas. Cant wait to grow in recovery and learn more!!!
Have a great sober day everyone
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,499
Originally Posted by growpath 
Although "make a plan" sounded so simple as I heard it on SR all the time I don't think I "got" that til this go round.
Make sure you are being kind to yourself. I used to be patient and kind to everyone but myself. It's important for me to reflect on things I did well during the day.
learning to live
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,665
I like that Anna. A good idea would be to add the things I did well during the day to my daily journal entry A lot of the time I am too hard on myself which doesn't help me in any way!
In early recovery people may not "get" my ways but I HAVE TO do what is best for me and my recovery.....they don't realize (although they should) if I am not sober they fall to the back burner.
One thing I have enjoyed about being sober is the attachment I have to the world. When drinking all I did was isolate and drink.
Onward and upward
A lot of the time I am too hard on myself which doesn't help me in any way!In early recovery people may not "get" my ways but I HAVE TO do what is best for me and my recovery.....they don't realize (although they should) if I am not sober they fall to the back burner.
One thing I have enjoyed about being sober is the attachment I have to the world. When drinking all I did was isolate and drink.
Onward and upward
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