7 weeks and feeling defeated
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Deep South, US
Posts: 62
7 weeks and feeling defeated
Hello all,
It's been a while since I posted. I am 7 weeks sober and while I should be jumping for joy, I'm feeling a bit defeated. It seems as though since becoming sober, from alcohol and cigarettes, I have been sick a lot more than usual. Normally, I would have 2 colds/year that wouldn't last long at all. Now, in the 7 weeks of being sober, I am on my second cold. It wouldn't bother me, but, the duration and intensity is a lot more than usual. The first lasted 3 weeks and this one, so far, is lasting almost a week with me waking up every night in coughing fits even though I take cough medicine! Maybe I'm just whining too much, but, it affects my moods b/c I can't work out b/c I'm too tired and weak, I feel like c*** at work all day, and it's making me anxious. I was wondering if anyone else had this happen after quitting and can tell me that it gets better b/c I'm starting to get discouraged
! Thank you!
It's been a while since I posted. I am 7 weeks sober and while I should be jumping for joy, I'm feeling a bit defeated. It seems as though since becoming sober, from alcohol and cigarettes, I have been sick a lot more than usual. Normally, I would have 2 colds/year that wouldn't last long at all. Now, in the 7 weeks of being sober, I am on my second cold. It wouldn't bother me, but, the duration and intensity is a lot more than usual. The first lasted 3 weeks and this one, so far, is lasting almost a week with me waking up every night in coughing fits even though I take cough medicine! Maybe I'm just whining too much, but, it affects my moods b/c I can't work out b/c I'm too tired and weak, I feel like c*** at work all day, and it's making me anxious. I was wondering if anyone else had this happen after quitting and can tell me that it gets better b/c I'm starting to get discouraged
! Thank you!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: SE Michigan
Posts: 1,066
I don't think this is unusual, you've confused your poor body by quitting both alcohol and nicotine. That's amazing, congratulations on your seven weeks! 
I've had similar experiences in the past, and used it as an excuse to start using again. Just make sure what you feel as being "discouraged" isn't your Addict Voice suggesting that you start drinking/smoking again. Your AV can be sneaky like that.
Boring advice: drink tons of water, eat well, your cold will be over with shortly.
I've had similar experiences in the past, and used it as an excuse to start using again. Just make sure what you feel as being "discouraged" isn't your Addict Voice suggesting that you start drinking/smoking again. Your AV can be sneaky like that.
Boring advice: drink tons of water, eat well, your cold will be over with shortly.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: Midwest USA
Posts: 69
Originally Posted by Stevie1 
I don't think this is unusual, you've confused your poor body by quitting both alcohol and nicotine. That's amazing, congratulations on your seven weeks!
I've had similar experiences in the past, and used it as an excuse to start using again. Just make sure what you feel as being "discouraged" isn't your Addict Voice suggesting that you start drinking/smoking again. Your AV can be sneaky like that.
Boring advice: drink tons of water, eat well, your cold will be over with shortly.
I've had similar experiences in the past, and used it as an excuse to start using again. Just make sure what you feel as being "discouraged" isn't your Addict Voice suggesting that you start drinking/smoking again. Your AV can be sneaky like that.
Boring advice: drink tons of water, eat well, your cold will be over with shortly.
In any regard, congrats on 7 weeks! That's amazing!
EndGame
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 4,677
After spending years destroying my immune system (not to mention my internal organs) with too much alcohol; consistently poor sleep; junk food or no food at all, and generally poor nutrition; increasing levels of unmanageable stress (I don't count my drinking as a good way to manage stress); medical and psychiatric issues due to drinking; a reliable succession of drunkenness followed by hangovers/withdrawal; an increasing absence of genuine, healthy interpersonal exchanges and an increase in isolation from others; episodes of extreme anxiety, both acute and chronic, around work, relationship, finances, and personal integrity; the exquisite kind of stress that comes with dramatic personality changes that not only don't seem to be under my conscious control, but also work against me; and just living the life of an active alcoholic, I was pretty much defeated in every area of functioning.
Following my relapse, I became the walking dead. I was living that dark night of the soul, in which I'd given up on life, on myself, and when I didn't even have the strength or motivation to take my own life. Everything was a struggle for me...getting out of bed, taking care of personal hygiene, getting myself to treatment during the day, and then to meetings at night. Eating.
I didn't want people to help me, and I didn't want new friends. I wanted only to be left alone; the thing I thought about most was getting my next drink. All this happened for about my first ten months back, and I saw no way out of it; I no longer believed I was able to get sober. And I no longer cared.
Something changed along the way. Without necessarily appreciating it while it was happening, I spent my surplus time (aka all my time) working on getting sober, despite my best efforts to avoid sobriety. The truth is, I had nothing better to do, and the only commitment -- really, the only conscious "activity" -- I made was to not drink, no matter what. It's now difficult for me to recall the person I was early on at 3+ years of sobriety.
For me, getting sober again truly sucked. I wanted nothing to do with it, and believed that I deserved to live an unhappy life because of my drinking, and because of the things I did and did not do while I was drinking.
There is a way out, though, as I commented, I wasn't nearly fully aware of my process while I was in it, beyond making a commitment not to drink, no matter what. I can appreciate in retrospect what might have "worked" for me and what didn't, but the only thing I know for certain is that making a commitment not to drink and a leap of faith (extremely muted and not fully believed) that there was a better way for me brought me to a much better place where, rather than just avoiding poison in my life, I could actually go about living my life happily as a sober person.
Following my relapse, I became the walking dead. I was living that dark night of the soul, in which I'd given up on life, on myself, and when I didn't even have the strength or motivation to take my own life. Everything was a struggle for me...getting out of bed, taking care of personal hygiene, getting myself to treatment during the day, and then to meetings at night. Eating.
I didn't want people to help me, and I didn't want new friends. I wanted only to be left alone; the thing I thought about most was getting my next drink. All this happened for about my first ten months back, and I saw no way out of it; I no longer believed I was able to get sober. And I no longer cared.
Something changed along the way. Without necessarily appreciating it while it was happening, I spent my surplus time (aka all my time) working on getting sober, despite my best efforts to avoid sobriety. The truth is, I had nothing better to do, and the only commitment -- really, the only conscious "activity" -- I made was to not drink, no matter what. It's now difficult for me to recall the person I was early on at 3+ years of sobriety.
For me, getting sober again truly sucked. I wanted nothing to do with it, and believed that I deserved to live an unhappy life because of my drinking, and because of the things I did and did not do while I was drinking.
There is a way out, though, as I commented, I wasn't nearly fully aware of my process while I was in it, beyond making a commitment not to drink, no matter what. I can appreciate in retrospect what might have "worked" for me and what didn't, but the only thing I know for certain is that making a commitment not to drink and a leap of faith (extremely muted and not fully believed) that there was a better way for me brought me to a much better place where, rather than just avoiding poison in my life, I could actually go about living my life happily as a sober person.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: New England
Posts: 1,926
Yes! Being sick a lot (and exhausted) is normal in early sobriety. I am coming back from a relapse but I had almost 6 years before my relapse last year and I remember going through the same thing!
I clearly remember feeling better at 4 months, then around a year, then 15 months, then 18 months.....stages of recovery. My problem is I stopped going to AA, got cocky and forgot I was an alcoholic & relapsed. I'm starting all over. But all we have is today, right.
Anyhow...I'm sorry you have been sick. Oh...by the way...I also quit smoking and drinking at the same time the first time AND this time. Your body may be expelling all those toxins which is good.
Sleep sleep sleep, eat healthy, drink lots if water and don't forget to get a check up with your doctor.
Hang in there!
Sent from my iPhone using SoberRecovery
I clearly remember feeling better at 4 months, then around a year, then 15 months, then 18 months.....stages of recovery. My problem is I stopped going to AA, got cocky and forgot I was an alcoholic & relapsed. I'm starting all over. But all we have is today, right.
Anyhow...I'm sorry you have been sick. Oh...by the way...I also quit smoking and drinking at the same time the first time AND this time. Your body may be expelling all those toxins which is good.
Sleep sleep sleep, eat healthy, drink lots if water and don't forget to get a check up with your doctor.
Hang in there!
Sent from my iPhone using SoberRecovery
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Gulf Coast, USA
Posts: 2,229
Congratulations on 7 weeks! Great accomplishment.
Your symptoms should ease over time. Although it's been years since i quit smoking, I remember being sick quite a bit during the early stages. Hasn't happened since I quit drinking, but I think everyone's symptoms / body's recovery mechanisms are different.
What you are going through is probably just your body's way of getting back to "normal". Like Dee said, however, if you are concerned then a Doctor's check-up is probably a good idea.
Best of luck!
Your symptoms should ease over time. Although it's been years since i quit smoking, I remember being sick quite a bit during the early stages. Hasn't happened since I quit drinking, but I think everyone's symptoms / body's recovery mechanisms are different.
What you are going through is probably just your body's way of getting back to "normal". Like Dee said, however, if you are concerned then a Doctor's check-up is probably a good idea.
Best of luck!
now's the time
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 2,181
With the coughing... as a fellow smoker who's quit a few times, that's very normal. I've read that smoking kills the cilia in your respiratory track, and when you quit they come back, and that can cause coughing. It's a good thing though. Hang in there!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: New Orleans, LA
Posts: 985
Hey sobriety sister, I'm right with you in feeling frustrated & unwell today...
I have 66 days sober and 12 days clean from cigs, & I feel dizzy, feverish, & lethargic. I actually just left work "sick", which is frowned upon in my office & which makes me feel guilty and "un-powerful."
I'm either catching a cold or having a detox reaction. I stopped the sugar & wheat this weekend, so only 3 days so far, but I know that I replaced the energy push of alcohol with sugar, so it's not odd that I'm suddenly drowning in fatigue.
While part of me says - this is silly & extreme; don't worry about something like sugar at this stage, a primary reason I got sober was to get well & healthy, & I think I was just delaying some aspects of detox with outrageous sugar consumption. I've never been drawn to sweets, & I was actually buying baked treats at the bakery & eating handfuls of candy in these last 2 months to propel myself through these first months.
I think the toxic body releases in stages. My expectation is that this whole first year will be about releasing toxins, and there will be lots of feeling crappy & getting sick, but I'll keep reaching healthier cleaner levels each go-round. It is called a healing crisis in fasting literature. I think that's what we're experiencing. At least that is a hopeful way to frame it.
I have 66 days sober and 12 days clean from cigs, & I feel dizzy, feverish, & lethargic. I actually just left work "sick", which is frowned upon in my office & which makes me feel guilty and "un-powerful."
I'm either catching a cold or having a detox reaction. I stopped the sugar & wheat this weekend, so only 3 days so far, but I know that I replaced the energy push of alcohol with sugar, so it's not odd that I'm suddenly drowning in fatigue.
While part of me says - this is silly & extreme; don't worry about something like sugar at this stage, a primary reason I got sober was to get well & healthy, & I think I was just delaying some aspects of detox with outrageous sugar consumption. I've never been drawn to sweets, & I was actually buying baked treats at the bakery & eating handfuls of candy in these last 2 months to propel myself through these first months.
I think the toxic body releases in stages. My expectation is that this whole first year will be about releasing toxins, and there will be lots of feeling crappy & getting sick, but I'll keep reaching healthier cleaner levels each go-round. It is called a healing crisis in fasting literature. I think that's what we're experiencing. At least that is a hopeful way to frame it.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 2,129
Originally Posted by EndGameNYC
After spending years destroying my immune system (not to mention my internal organs) with too much alcohol; consistently poor sleep; junk food or no food at all, and generally poor nutrition; increasing levels of unmanageable stress (I don't count my drinking as a good way to manage stress); medical and psychiatric issues due to drinking; a reliable succession of drunkenness followed by hangovers/withdrawal; an increasing absence of genuine, healthy interpersonal exchanges and an increase in isolation from others; episodes of extreme anxiety, both acute and chronic, around work, relationship, finances, and personal integrity; the exquisite kind of stress that comes with dramatic personality changes that not only don't seem to be under my conscious control, but also work against me; and just living the life of an active alcoholic, I was pretty much defeated in every area of functioning.
Following my relapse, I became the walking dead. I was living that dark night of the soul, in which I'd given up on life, on myself, and when I didn't even have the strength or motivation to take my own life. Everything was a struggle for me...getting out of bed, taking care of personal hygiene, getting myself to treatment during the day, and then to meetings at night. Eating.
I didn't want people to help me, and I didn't want new friends. I wanted only to be left alone; the thing I thought about most was getting my next drink. All this happened for about my first ten months back, and I saw no way out of it; I no longer believed I was able to get sober. And I no longer cared.
Something changed along the way. Without necessarily appreciating it while it was happening, I spent my surplus time (aka all my time) working on getting sober, despite my best efforts to avoid sobriety. The truth is, I had nothing better to do, and the only commitment -- really, the only conscious "activity" -- I made was to not drink, no matter what. It's now difficult for me to recall the person I was early on at 3+ years of sobriety.
For me, getting sober again truly sucked. I wanted nothing to do with it, and believed that I deserved to live an unhappy life because of my drinking, and because of the things I did and did not do while I was drinking.
There is a way out, though, as I commented, I wasn't nearly fully aware of my process while I was in it, beyond making a commitment not to drink, no matter what. I can appreciate in retrospect what might have "worked" for me and what didn't, but the only thing I know for certain is that making a commitment not to drink and a leap of faith (extremely muted and not fully believed) that there was a better way for me brought me to a much better place where, rather than just avoiding poison in my life, I could actually go about living my life happily as a sober person.
Following my relapse, I became the walking dead. I was living that dark night of the soul, in which I'd given up on life, on myself, and when I didn't even have the strength or motivation to take my own life. Everything was a struggle for me...getting out of bed, taking care of personal hygiene, getting myself to treatment during the day, and then to meetings at night. Eating.
I didn't want people to help me, and I didn't want new friends. I wanted only to be left alone; the thing I thought about most was getting my next drink. All this happened for about my first ten months back, and I saw no way out of it; I no longer believed I was able to get sober. And I no longer cared.
Something changed along the way. Without necessarily appreciating it while it was happening, I spent my surplus time (aka all my time) working on getting sober, despite my best efforts to avoid sobriety. The truth is, I had nothing better to do, and the only commitment -- really, the only conscious "activity" -- I made was to not drink, no matter what. It's now difficult for me to recall the person I was early on at 3+ years of sobriety.
For me, getting sober again truly sucked. I wanted nothing to do with it, and believed that I deserved to live an unhappy life because of my drinking, and because of the things I did and did not do while I was drinking.
There is a way out, though, as I commented, I wasn't nearly fully aware of my process while I was in it, beyond making a commitment not to drink, no matter what. I can appreciate in retrospect what might have "worked" for me and what didn't, but the only thing I know for certain is that making a commitment not to drink and a leap of faith (extremely muted and not fully believed) that there was a better way for me brought me to a much better place where, rather than just avoiding poison in my life, I could actually go about living my life happily as a sober person.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Colorado
Posts: 118
Originally Posted by Melina
DANG! I re-read the first paragraph three times in a row to extract all the goodness. And then I proceeded to do the same with the following paragraphs, and finally read the post as a whole. The sincerity of how you deliver your experience is palpable and touching. This is a fantastic post, thank you!!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Deep South, US
Posts: 62
Thank you all for the amazing support! I'm feeling a little better today. Still coughing a lot at night, but it didn't keep me up too much last night!! I ended up taking the day off yesterday b/c my 5 yo was also sick the night before vomiting, so, I got a lot of good rest yesterday
.
Dee... I will be seeing my doc the first week of November so I'll ask him about all of this craziness
Serenidad...Yes, I think that the combo of drinking and smoking was especially toxic, so, I guess it will take a little longer for us smokers who quit to bounce back!
Endgame...thank you so much for your heartfelt post. I too have that faith that there is something out there better for each and every one of us struggling to get our lives back together. Maybe we will appreciate it more than those who aren't addicted because we had to work harder at it!!
.Dee... I will be seeing my doc the first week of November so I'll ask him about all of this craziness
Serenidad...Yes, I think that the combo of drinking and smoking was especially toxic, so, I guess it will take a little longer for us smokers who quit to bounce back!
Endgame...thank you so much for your heartfelt post
. I too have that faith that there is something out there better for each and every one of us struggling to get our lives back together. Maybe we will appreciate it more than those who aren't addicted because we had to work harder at it!!
Better when never is never
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Wisconsin near Twin Cities
Posts: 1,745
Drinking can mask the damage we have done to our bodies. Only once we are sober do we start to get an accurate assessment of where we are with our health. I know when I quit smoking (9 years this Christmas), I started coughing up all sorts of lovely stuff. It will get better.
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