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Frustated

Old 10-14-2014, 11:31 AM
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Frustated

Hello everyone..... I am a newcomer. I have been with my guy for almost 20 years....never married. Drinking has always been a part of our life. Started out with beer then moved to beer/whiskey. I am not good about sharing my secret with to many people as he is a great guy without the booze. It's the whiskey that I truly hate. It changes the way he acts and feels. He used to be verbally abusing until he went to counseling a few years ago. I just don't feel loved when he drinks. I am angry sometimes just going to bed...depressed. He tells me I am the one that has the problem with his drinking. Of course I do because I hate it so much. About 7 years ago I decided to join the "party" (and I am a social drinker or don't have to drink to have fun) and drank every weekend to numb my pain and pass out so I didn't have to deal with him. 4 years ago I realized I was just hurting myself and told him I was done and moved out. Of course he told me everything I wanted to hear and we got back together. I just don't understand how we can go to a function and we drink then we come home and he switches to whiskey. I know he needs that high that is probably the switch. I have thought and thought about going to Al-anon groups but don't want him to be judged in the town we live in. I know that is me protecting his feelings and not mine. i am a protector and giver. In the last couple of weeks I have just had it with the drinking. I want to have fun with my guy and not have the other "thing" always hanging over my head. I feel like their is 3 of us in this relationship. Truly and great guy just doesn't know his limitations to stop.
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Old 10-14-2014, 11:56 AM
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Welcome to SR sbeach

really nice to meet you
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Old 10-14-2014, 12:46 PM
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Welcome to the Forum!!
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Old 10-14-2014, 12:55 PM
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