Terrified.

Old 10-10-2014, 07:53 AM
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Terrified.

Yesterday was the hardest day of my life. My A was thinking suicide. He was saying goodbye to me. He tried reaching out to hotlines (they weren't helpful), he felt alone...and he wanted to die.

There was nothing I could do. Nothing. Luckily his family and I worked on getting police to his apartment, he went to the ER. He was being evaluated for psychological disorders.

Needless to say, yesterday was the hardest day...

I'm flying to see him this afternoon. He's alive and he's doing much better. I just need to see him. I need to hold him, I need to sleep next to him, I need to hold his hand, I need to make sure he's really okay. It's so easy to say it over the phone, to fake a smile over skpe...but I'll know tonight.

Oh man. Just waiting for the time to go by will be so hard.
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Old 10-10-2014, 08:33 AM
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I'm sorry. My AH has talked about suicide too. SOmetimes they feel so hopeless in their addiction that there is no other way.

Saying prayers for you and your A. Hopefully the hospital and doctors will let him know there is hope, there is help, there is a way out that will let him live a happy and healthy life.

CHeck in when you can, let us know how things are going. Hugs and prayers.
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Old 10-10-2014, 08:34 AM
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Oh ((((dreamer)))!!!!
So sorry!!! I know my words can't reach you the way I wish they could. Just know that my thoughts and prayers are with you and your Husband!

He's getting help....so that is a good thing. Sometimes it takes something horrible like this to get the help he so desperately needs!

It won't be long and you will be there with him!
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Old 10-10-2014, 10:09 AM
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Oh dreamer! ((((hugs))))) i just saw your thread! I'm so sorry! It's just horrible, that they don't see other solutions than wanting to die, when they are in such a dark place! I can imagine how you feel, been there a few days ago!
I'm glad you and his family got the police there and he's doing okayish. And i'm glad you can go see him! I'm sure it will help you both!

(((((((hugs))))))) time will pass and soon you'll be with him! Hang in there!
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Old 10-10-2014, 12:35 PM
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Dreamer,

I know how scared you must be right now, Im so sorry. He’s safe right now at the hospital? I hope they are able to get him the help he needs. If he called hotlines, called his family then I feel he wants help. My husband became very depressed in rehab one time and talked about such things, he got out of control and smashed his hand through a window and got all cut up, they had to take him to the ER. Instability comes from all this, and its so scary for them, and us. I will pray for both of you, his parents too they must be hurting so badly too. We care Dreamer, and we’re here for you.
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Old 10-10-2014, 01:27 PM
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Blue's right, Dreamer, if he called for help then he really was looking for help, not a permanent out. My sister is bi-polar, and she attempted suicide many times before finding the right cocktail of meds for her. On the ones she was serious about, no one knew until it was (almost) too late. She'll be the first one to say now that if someone is reaching out, they are wanting to be helped.
Hugs. Post when you can, and know we're praying for the both of you.
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Old 10-10-2014, 11:49 PM
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Prayers going ^^^ for all of you tonight.
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Old 10-11-2014, 07:07 PM
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How are you guys doing Dreamer? Please let us know whenever you get the chance to check in ok? Thinking about you today.
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Old 10-13-2014, 08:06 AM
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Oh ladies...thank you so much for the prayers and the well wishes and the good thoughts...

I arrived last night back from visiting him. He's doing much better. It was just so draining and terrifying and all I could think about was how angry I was. Not at him. It wasn't even the alcohol that did it. I mean, it didn't HELP. But his depression got the best of him. And it could've taken his life if he hadn't said so many cryptic things to me.

All is okay, for now. I say that because there's no saying what will happen tomorrow. But I believe he's genuinely willing to get help now. Thank god. He was given recommendations by doctors and a psychologist and he's going this week to get the help.

Hopefully it works out. I know there will still be bumps, but I'm hoping that he won't have to feel the need to suffer anymore.
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Old 10-13-2014, 11:25 AM
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Its a relief to hear he's doing better Dreamer. Im sure all of this took an emotional toll on you. How are you feeling today? What types of referrals did he get? My husband has been on a couple different medications for his depression plus works with a counselor. Over time there has been progress made because of it. Another issue was insomnia oh boy this is a fun one. I think I had sympathy insomnia HAHA or in truth once my sleep patterns got off it just turned into my own I guess. One thing Ive learned, humans are complex!
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Old 10-14-2014, 06:44 PM
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Dreamer I'm glad he got some referrals. Hopefully, he will find some help. You must be exhausted!! Hopefully you can get some rest tonight. It looks like you are being very realistic about all this.

I'm sure he was glad you were there for him this weekend.
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Old 10-15-2014, 01:44 PM
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Dreamer, I'm so glad he is getting help. There is always something behind the drinking. Our counselor says quitting drinking is only 25% of the problem. Once it's out of the system, work on the other 75% starts.

Hoping you have been able to get some rest, physically and mentally. Lots of prayers for both of you!
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Old 10-18-2014, 08:30 AM
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Just catching up Dreamer but so sorry you and he are in all of this right now, I hope he got to see the docs this week, maybe it is next week. Thinking about you both.
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