Sulu1

I posted recently about how well I was doing with my sobriety. Things have ultimately gone downhill.

I've been drinking beer since Friday and I'm at that awful stage where I want and know I need to stop but I'm feeling so poorly when I try its hard not to drink more.

I've been here a good few times now and I've had all the advice - the ball is in my court to stay sober but I've not managed to do it for myself yet. I Think I'm just looking for some support while I come off of the beer and regain some form of normal thinking again. I ended up ringing the local NHS crisis team last night.

I've not been dealing at all with the stress going on right now and should have seen this coming. I chose to drink ultimately and I knew what would happen. My coping mechanisms suck!

Bah - I've got myself up and outta bed as having a pity party just makes things worse. I'm up and dressed and trying to focus on daytime tv. I have beer in the house still which I'm going to have to get rid of.

It can probably be read from my post how down I'm feeling right now. I really didn't want to post because I've been here time and time again and never seem to give anything back to the community. Hopefully this is a reminder to all the sober folk how much better it is to be sober. I'm a different bloke from 4 days ago it really scares me.

All the best.

Mountainmanbob

It sure is a reminder for this guy up top the mountain.
I remember when I could not stay away from the drink for more than an hour, much less 24 hours.
Sometimes we need to dig a little deeper and keep trying.

Wishing for you a sober life with no more pity or pain.

MM

SoberLeigh

Really glad that you posted, MrG. We understand; there is no cause for shame among your SR community.

First things first, I guess. Pour, or have someone else pour, that beer down the drain.

Stay with SR today and always. When you feel weak or triggered, post, talk to us.

Do you have face to face support - AA?

Did the NHS crisis team have any suggestions?

Findingtheway

I totally understand MrG.

I thought i was rocking with my sobriety too...Then i got a false sense of confidence that i didn't REALLY have a problem with drink anymore. I stopped coming to SR. I hardly attended AA anymore.

Took one drink...And i landed in the hospital. I'm back to my 4th day of sobriety but am anxious as all hell today. But i KNOW it gets better. And i think you do too.

Please keep posting. And don't drink today. Get rid of the beer in your house now.

You are NOT alone in these feelings. Thank you for posting.

Mark1014

Hi MrG, first off, I like your signature quote. Secondly, your courage to post the raw truth of your feelings today has already benefited this struggling guy. As I'm quite sure you've seen on this site, virtually all of us go through relapsing to some degree. I wish I knew what the switch is that finally makes the effort stick. But one thing's for sure, it'll never stick if we don't keep trying.....but I guess you know this because you chose a great quote. I am rooting for you today.

Sulu1

Thanks so much guys - think I just needed that 'virtual hug' SR offers. I've just thrown the beer out and i'm preparing to buckle down, gear up and get ready to go again. I won't ever give up I know that much.

The crisis team are a strange beast - I phoned up wanting to be admitted. With my mental health problems I did think I'd be sent in. I think due to lack of resources though they dont have a spot - so they've given me an appointment tomorrow for someone to check me over. I can't fault them though they have been great for me in the past. If things get worse I'll have to ask to be seen sooner than tomorrow. Luckily I have the week off work so have some time to sort myself out.

razor15

It is brave of you to post. Thank you as it is helpful for myself in my journey. I hope you can get rid of the beer and work on staying sober today.

Sulu1

I really appreciate that - thank you. Its a quote that means a lot to me - I have it tattooed on me actually.

I wish you all the best with your recovery bud.

Anna

I hope you keep the appointment tomorrow. It could be helpful in your recovery.

Good for you for posting about your relapse and seeking support. I still remember that feeling of knowing that there is no easy way out of the situation. But, you can get back working on your recovery and you don't have to go through this again.

Soberwolf

Good luck in staying sober

FreeOwl

there's no easy path. there's no other way 'round it. the only way to get to the good side of sobriety is to put down the booze and walk away from it.

until you're ready and fully willing to do that.... no amount of other ideas or suggestions will matter.

Treerat66

We're here to support you MrG

Stayingsober72

We've been where you are MrG. Throw that beer out and start fresh. Try to get to some meetings for support. We are here for you in spirit and I wish you he best. You can do this. Big hugs.

Gilmer

Hang in there! Eventually it will stick if you keep giving it all you've got.

Sulu1

Thanks all ill get there in the end.

PurpleKnight

Hang in there MrG! You can turn this around!!

Dee74

Wishing you the very best MrG. Let us know how that appointment goes

D

Hevyn

Hi MrG. You give back by telling your story and sharing your feelings. I'm sure your experience will help many to sort things out for themselves.

We're always going to be on your side and here to help. I'm glad you reached out. Better days lie ahead.

Wastinglife

It's tough to end a binge that's a few days in. You know you're gonna suffer a horrible hangover or maybe some withdrawal symptoms. I would continue drinking day after day, week after week in order to delay the inevitable crash. Usually, a binge would only end for me if I ran out of money or something bad happened, whichever came first.

Sometimes you just gotta say enough is enough. Today it ends. Prepare yourself for feeling miserable for a few days and sober up. Rooting for you Mr G!

Sasha4

Hey mate..listen you have some good things in your life.
A job, a home, a TV to watch, access to free healthcare, people here who care and understand. Don't forget that. I have to remind myself like that day in and out.

Thats drink for you though.
Its the powerful and cunning bit thats talked about at AA.

Drink is a huge anti-depressent.
A couple of days on it without enough sleep, good food and water could make the sanest person on earth feel like they are going mad.

You did great chucking it out.
Look after yourself - rest, eat well, sleep, hydrate yourself, turn This Morning off and get some fresh air, maybe a walk on the quayside, contact friends, don't be alone - and I am sure the world will seem like a better place.

If it was so easy to stop and not be pulled back into the trap of alcohol, AA and SR would not exist.
Its hard but it is worth it in the end.

I wish you the best xx