Travellinggirl

hi. I've come onto here as I need to stop binge drinking. I'm a 41 year old professional woman. Yesterday I was out drinking for 10 hours drinking wine. By the end of the night I was a mess, threw up over myself which caused me to also wet myself. I am totally ashamed today and have woken up to this isn't a good way to be. I can go days without drink but once I have that first glass I just keep going

Barnumb

Welcome. Today is a great day to change your life to a sober one that only you control. I have just posted my first post today, but have been an observer for months. I am newly on the sober program for 3 days. Get sober for October is a great place to start. You just have to 100% want it! Best wishes on your voyage.

HellJuice

Hi Travelinggirl, It's really great that you decided today will be your first day.
The only thing I'd warn you on is to not use specific dates as the day to quit ie, first day of the month, birthdates, anniversaries, new years, etc etc.
I myself have found that never works well because you are using a date due to the significance of the date itself to quit and not basing your decision to quit on that day solely on the fact that you want to quit. I'm not saying that's why you chose OCT 1st, but it's just something I myself found never worked.
Thats really why most new years resolutions are broken, because those people who make resolutions on that date were never ready to make that promise to themselves in the first place.

Travellinggirl

Thanks Barnumb. I really do. My whole social life revolves around drinkers though which is daunting. Also I have just come out of a long term relationship which means I having plenty of me time. I've signed up for a half marathon to stay focused and to help if I get any cravings. A run will hopefully help. Well done on your first 3 days. Did you normally drink daily or binge??

Travellinggirl

Ok thanks Helljuice. I just saw it as the first day of my turned around life but I do understand what you are saying. I hadn't really thought about it to be honest

Barnumb

I am what you would consider a highly functional alcoholic. I would go days or weeks without and in may cases be able to put it down after a few. It always seemed to creep up on me until it hit a breaking point, then I would reset the switch. If you read my first post, you will get a better understanding of where I have been. Regardless, I have read a lot about how important to keep growing while going through recovery. Glad to see a 1/2 marathon goal and a good run always clears the demon's besides sure is hard to run with a bottle of wine!

OpenWindow

Welcome TravelingGirl! I started yesterday and feeling great so far. I was a 10+ hour wine drinker on an almost daily basis, though somehow highly functional and productive.

I too have a running goal to help me focus, though it's raining here today I went out and it was a great feeling.

Glad to have you here.

SoberLeigh

Welcome, Travelling. Today is always a beautiful day to stop drinking.

Glad you found SR.

P.S. - wine was my poison, too.

Travellinggirl

Hi Open window. That's fantastic. I'm off for a long weekend away. This will involve pub lunches etc with the family but planning on using this time to detox on juice. I love running in the rain....makes you feel alive ��

Travellinggirl

thanks Soberleigh. I love wine and enjoyed a glass when cooking etc. I just wish there was nicer soft drinks

SoberLeigh

I have found something called "Blood Orange" made by "O" Organics; not bad, especially over ice.

TryingInTexas

Just one day. That's all you have to focus on.

Wastinglife

The last binge I went on started with a pint at a pub for lunch. I ended up going on a one-man bar crawl and got home 10pm for my furious girlfriend to see me stumble in and vomit all over the kitchen floor.

I think it had been 3 months since I had a drink before that, however I was daily drinker at one point too before rehab.

I also would wet myself in a blackout, ruined a lot couch cushions over the years!!

JD4010

Hey!

Happy to hear you are walking the path with the rest of us.

I had to make myself really, REALLY sick to finally get the message to stop drinking.

Treerat66

Hi Travellinggirl

Welcome to SR

Travellinggirl

It's such a terrible feeling the next day isn't it. How can I let something take away any self respect I have. I wasn't even in my own house! I was at a friends and they witnessed it all. I couldn't remember a thing but the told me this morning

Alynn

Welcome! This is how I drank.. Days without but ended badly way to often when I did.

September first was my first day and September was wonderful! Honestly worth it.. No hangover, embarrassment, anxiety, alcohol caused drama.

I've been on SR everyday. Leave it behind. Take it a day at a time, you will be so glad you did.

I can do all things through he who strengthens me

firstymer

When I was drinking heavily, guilt and shame were my constant companions.

Deciding to quit drinking, especially after the night you had, is relatively easy. I made that decision, and then broke it, dozens of times.

The hard part is getting past Day 2. And Day 6. And Day 17. For that, you need a plan. SR is a great resource for that. And the people here have been incredibly supportive and kind to me. I wish the same for you.

The good news is that you never again have to feel the guilt and shame that you woke up to this morning. What a great incentive for sobriety that is, don't you agree?

Good luck. And welcome. I am glad you are here with us.

razor15

Welcome travellinggirl. The guilt and shame I had after numerous "attempts" to quit ended in failure was tough for me and actually fed my alcoholism. For a long time I've always said I never got too out of control, or blacked out or embarrassed myself, but your post reminded me of two times I woke up in bed after wetting it. Tough to admit but boy, is that low. With a clearer head now, I am amazed I let myself get to that point. I guess I wasn't as "together" as I thought.
Way to go recognizing your decision needed to be made. We are here to support you!
This place is so wonderful.

PurpleKnight

Welcome to the Forum!! Great to have you onboard!!