Notices

day 7 - dealing with a drunk!

Old 09-27-2014, 04:50 AM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
marina1981's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 51
day 7 - dealing with a drunk!

So yesterday was day 6 and the challenge of a Friday night. My other half has been away since Monday morning working in Scotland, he was due home at 2 pm, 3 at the latest. By 5 I begin to worry that he may have had an accident, by 7 I know he has gone straight to the pub. When he came home at 9 absolutely wasted I was
fuming inside, on the outside I stayed calm and stayed away from the wine!

By 11.30 am he has gone back to the pub to meet his dead beat, cocaine sniffing friends, god knows what time he will come home and what state he will be in. My first weekend without drink, wouldn't you think he would show some support as he hates it when I drink?

So here I am, left alone again with two kids, no money to do anything and a bitter taste in my mouth, as he drinks away our money.

Anyway, this just makes me more determined to succeed and hopefully he may see he has a bigger problem than I ever had. If not, who knows, but I am strong and will stay this way!

marina1981 is offline  
Old 09-27-2014, 04:54 AM
  # 2 (permalink)  
Member
 
MavisTheFairy13's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 668
Oh no well done on not letting this break you. What did he have to say for himself this morning? I would have changed the locks!
MavisTheFairy13 is offline  
Old 09-27-2014, 04:58 AM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
marina1981's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 51
he told me to hurry up in the bath so he could get ready to go out and dump the baby on me again! No apology etc
marina1981 is offline  
Old 09-27-2014, 04:59 AM
  # 4 (permalink)  
Member
 
sprout50's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 819
Good for you! I have a husband who doesn't drink so I live in an alcohol free zone. Huge props for you to be able to stay sober under these conditions!
sprout50 is offline  
Old 09-27-2014, 05:04 AM
  # 5 (permalink)  
Member
 
MavisTheFairy13's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 668
Originally Posted by marina1981 View Post
he told me to hurry up in the bath so he could get ready to go out and dump the baby on me again! No apology etc
Has he already gone out? If not you go out! We all need a break and some time to ourselves. If he was working away all week it would be nice for him to spend some time with the baby and give you some free time. He doesn't sound very supportive x
MavisTheFairy13 is offline  
Old 09-27-2014, 05:14 AM
  # 6 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
marina1981's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 51
He was out before I could say a word, out last night, out today, I work tomorrow and then he goes away again on a Monday morning and I have the kids all week. Nice life for some!
marina1981 is offline  
Old 09-27-2014, 05:17 AM
  # 7 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
marina1981's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 51
Part of me thinks he wants me to fail and give in so we can drink in the house again, unfortunately for him I am very stubborn and it only spurs me on more to stay sober.
marina1981 is offline  
Old 09-27-2014, 06:19 AM
  # 8 (permalink)  
Member
 
MavisTheFairy13's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 668
Think you need to have a serious talk with him about where things are going and why he can't support you. I take it he doesn't think he has a drink problem. My husband can take or leave booze apart from when he's out with his friends when he will get drunk - but he only goes out maybe 3 times a year. It's hard enough doing this let alone without support - have you got family or friends who can help?
MavisTheFairy13 is offline  
Old 09-27-2014, 06:27 AM
  # 9 (permalink)  
Member
 
biminiblue's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
He sounds very selfish.

I hope you have friends nearby. If not, try to find some. You can build a life for you and your children with other moms.
biminiblue is offline  
Old 09-27-2014, 06:57 AM
  # 10 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
marina1981's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 51
He thinks not drinking in the house and going to the pub is being supportive, unfortunately this means that I am left with the kids all week. He refuses to accept that I have a drink problem, says I just can't handle it, this makes him feel better about drinking. He can be a lovely and generous man, but whenever I need him the most he seems to retreat into his old bachelor ways.

I do have good friends and we all have children of similar ages, my friends aren't big drinkers which is good. So thankfully I have a good support system, just wish he would be part of it.
marina1981 is offline  
Old 09-27-2014, 07:05 AM
  # 11 (permalink)  
Member
 
Mountainmanbob's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
Originally Posted by marina1981 View Post

Anyway, this just makes me more determined to succeed and hopefully he may see he has a bigger problem than I ever had.
It's sad but, about all that we can do at times is set a good moral example. Hopefully he will see in time what he is lacking in himself. Possibly when he sobers up you two can have a sober talk and both seek continued sobriety together. The wonders that this has brought to many lost families are beyond count.

MM-Bob
Mountainmanbob is offline  

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 01:23 AM.