Testifying in court tomorrow!

Old 09-09-2014, 04:55 PM
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Testifying in court tomorrow!

My XAB was arrested for hitting me in the face last December (ongoing abuse for a few years, just first time I called the cops).

I'm so scared. I don't want to see him. I didn't have time to prepare because I didn't get the summons and the DA called me today to say if I don't testify tomorrow the case will be dismissed. When she said that everything he did to me flashed before my eyes and I can't let him get away with it.

I have a video of a different time when I was filming him so he could see how bad his drinking was. He got mad and hit me. I don't know if I should use it as evidence. I have no idea what to expect and the DV advocate won't be there. Hopefully I can get a lawyer for the day. Do I need to pay them? I don't have anyone to go with me for support but I'm going to call my case worker beforehand so she can give me encouragement.

Ahhh so nervous!
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Old 09-09-2014, 05:09 PM
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OMG this must be so hard for you.
Some courts have safety guidelines so if you ring the court & tell them of your concerns they won't make you wait in the same room etc before being called up.
I would definitely take the evidence with you regardless of whether you wish to use it or not.
It all seems very sudden?
Can't offer much advise re. a lawyer last minute but the courthouse should be able to guide you there, ring & talk to them.
I'm so sorry you don't have a support person to go with you.
I'm sure others will be along to offer advise.
Thinking of you & sending hugs & good for you for finally standing up to your abuser, he should not get away with this.
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Old 09-09-2014, 06:33 PM
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No advice, just support. You're doing a brave thing. I'll be thinking of you, and sending positive energy and prayers all day.
(((((((( hugs ))))))))
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Old 09-09-2014, 06:42 PM
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Hugs and support!!!! You are doing the right thing. You cannot let him get away with it. Stay strong!!!! You have tons of support here. Use it!!!! Sending love your way!!!!!
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Old 09-09-2014, 07:36 PM
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Yes! Submit the video as evidence!!! That will push the court date out further and possibly be leverage for him to plead guilty. I'm going through something very similar....
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Old 09-09-2014, 07:39 PM
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Babe, you can do this. You don't have to look at him. The DA's office will be there -- when I testified in a similar situation, they were super supportive. I'm sorry you didn't get more prior warning, and I'm sorry you don't have anyone to bring with you. Call the DA's office and ask them if they want the video -- I doubt they'd use it (it's from another event, and he's not on trial for being a general abuser and ********, he's on trial for one particular instance of hitting you.

The flashback you got was scary, right? I hate those. Tell you what though: They do go away. They get weaker. You will get to a point where you can even talk about what happened without flinching.

Testifying is a great way for you to stand up for yourself and say "I don't deserve being abused; I know I didn't deserve it; and I want the court to tell him he was wrong."
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Old 09-09-2014, 07:42 PM
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Originally Posted by PunchDrunk View Post
Yes! Submit the video as evidence!!! That will push the court date out further and possibly be leverage for him to plead guilty. I'm going through something very similar....
Thanks to Google+ for backing up the video!

Best wishes to you too. I know nothing about the court system. Definitely learning from this experience.
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